Life

[helensib]

I feel like my life is over i am 46 and married one daughter at home my husband works full time I have had fibromyalga for years and as im getting older if feels like its getting worse my husband has no understanding at all he tells me to get out and find a job and as i also suffer with depressin he makes me feel even worse i explain i cant work as my body hurts so much and he says there are people out there with n limbs who work Grrr he makes me so angry and i think im ending up resenting him i am in so much pain all over i just want to end it all on times its that bad i have very little gd days and when i do i make the most of them i wish i could feel better i hate being like this am i on my own or are there others out there x

[chilli50]

You are not alone hun. this site is fantastic so have a good look around. no matter what the problem,whether it is big or insignificant,or you have a question, everyone and i mean everyone here has the same health issues so there is always on hand to answer your questions, give advice or be a shoulder to cry on if thats what you need

i would go see your gp .to see if there is anything else you can do about your pain. Its a case of trial and error finding what works for you so please please persevere. is your gp sympathetic? do they have a good understanding of fibro? If not, you need to find one that does, or you could print off some infotmation and ask if they are willing to research fm in order to help you.

As for your husband, there is an excellent post on here called " a letter to normals " you could print off a copy after adapting it for your needs and give it to him to read. if he continues being so.callous ( sorry, my opinion ) then i would seriously think about your relationship with him

love and gentle hugs

chilli xxx

[Hidden]

hi and you are now in for a lecture !!! lol please dont talk like that feel you want to end it all that is an awful thing to say especially when you have a daughter jus t imagine how she would feel if you did anything like that ????? imagine what she would gpo through for the rest of her life and look what you will miss out on in the future when your daughter evntually probbably gets a partner maybe kids of her own and her mum is not there to share those moments ???

also your husband too your re his wife out yourself in his shoes !!! how would you feel if he done something silly ????

see it is not a nice thought is it i am not being horrible or nasty but yes you have got fibromyalgia like we all have and we all feel so down at times we do say and perhaps do rash things but the thing is we have to not let fibromyalgia rule oour lives , it is a horrible illness and really unless you have this you cannot understand it ,

i am not sticking up for your husband but i think you really need to sit him down and show him this site so he can see what we all have and also maybe take him to appointments with you if he can go . it is something that i know on some days i could do something for an hour then maybe not be able to do it the next 3 days so for me too a job is out of the question

i am the same age as you and i too think my god is this it for the next 20 years ??? ansd if it is i am gonna have to turn it around because i am gonna do no good sitting in a chair feeling sorry for myself for 20 years am i ?

i am glad you are on here as i think you will get alot from it we all do

so please dont say things like that again jus think today of that poor girl and her family who died doing the marathon in her late 20'2 bless her heart imagine what her family are going through and i am sure you wouldnt want your family to go through that so get them together and tell them all you can about fibro there is loads on the internert outside of this site and join me today (ref my earlier blog) in it being fibromyalgia positivity day !! you take care and sorry if i went off on a tangent i jus wan t you to realise you are a lovely human being with an illness you didnt ask for and you are not alone you can always come on here for help advice and a laugh will chat again soon love to you diddle x

[helensib in reply to Hidden]

I dont want to be thinking like this i cryed so much the other evening i told my husband i want to go to sleep and not wake up i know its selfish but when i get in that state i dont know what to do i love my family very much and would never hurt them but i have no one to talk to nobody understands how im feeling i have just joined this group so i am trying to sort my self out but like everything it takes time xx

[chilli50]

Sorry, i couldnt fit it all in on the last post. there is

always somebody here for you hun, you are not alone. please dont think you have to suffer through this on your own. even if you dont feel up to posting i find it really theraputic to read through the posts on the site. there is always someone here who has the same strange symptom no matter how small. or has a funny or uplifting story to tell. you seem to always find that yhere are people on here you get an urge to hrlp because you understand just how they are feeling and where they are in their lives. please have heart sweetheart we are here when you need us ok?

Love and hope

Chilli xxx

[helensib]

I got nobody who understands what im going throu in my life im finding it very very hard prehaps i am feeling sorry for my self i use to be so full of life but not anymore i dont go out im in doors day in day out people ask me to go out but i always got an excuse i wont go out on my own forever missing appointments because i wont go out im on prozac i do feel a little better but still a work in progress im tired all the time no energy at all how can i pick my self up out of this nightmare xx

thanks both for yr comments xxxxxxxxxx

[Hidden]

well sweetie they are not going to understand if you dont let them in to understand you must sit down with your family and tell or show them all about fibro either by this site or booklets etc i think they would quite shocked and upset to see what you have written and also guilty they havent been there for you more bless you

The other thing is you arent really helping by not going out just try to go for a walk around where you live you will find it does help you to be out and you always see someone worse than you

you should go to your appointments as they will help you ttooo perhaps your meds need updating and your pain relirf but please you are not alone really your not i know we are not physically here for you but its the next best thing read a few og my blogs a few days ago i think one was about ibs arghhhh i was on a real downer like you in fact it was early hours i wrote one blog and a member on here was sooo concerned about me ansd my state of mind she private messaged me and gave me her mobile number to call her threre and then how kind is that ?

so you see your not alone that private message gave mwe a real kick to think that someone out there was soo worried abou me to do that and i felt bad thinking i had worried someone that much i really di so see we all get like you are now but the other thing is if you are as low as you can get which it sounds like you are

the only way from there is up isnt it so focus on that

here for you love diddle x

[lynz]

i cant say anything else that hasnt already been said ,only that please keep in touch on here ,it really can make a difference to day to day life ,just talking about your day or having a moan ,we really do understand how you are feeling hun ,

like diddle said when you reach rock bottom the only way is up

gentle hugs to you xxxxx

[jazher]

Hi helen,

I am so sorry you are feeling like that.

I think you need to get back to your doc about your antidepressants hun.

I was a bugger (still am), for not explaining things and not telling people how its affecting me, but it is so hard for someone to know about fibro unless they have got it.

I think your husband maybe was a bit harsh with saying go back to work, but he maybe doesnt mean it as bad as what it sounds.

My partner says stuff and i take it the tottally wrong way all the time, i am an emotional wreck especially at night and first thing in the morning when i am absolutly exhausted.

This site is brilliant and we are all here for you.

take care, hugs, kel xxxx

[karencw]

hi, u r certainly not alone, no-one who doesn't suffer with this illness understands what you r going thru. We all do thats why this site is so good. My hubby doesn't really understand as he is so fit, hill runner, loads of energy all the time, why should i expect him to understand, he's a man! If you would like to talk just let me know and i will send you a message with a tel no. Take care, x hug x

[Hidden]

Helen, I'm with you all the way. I'm not married but my 'significant other' is my Dad who was like your husband is. He just didn't want to know about my symptoms but he has got better over time.

I suffer from depression too and actually tried suicide twice last summer and was in psychiatric hospital for a month.

You certainly are not alone.

Love and hugs Christine xxx

[linksy]

Hiya

You are not alone and I hope you are having a better day. The thing that helped me was that I found some leaflets about fibromyalgia to give to my family to read as they didn't understand that i was in pain and felt really unwell. If someone has not experienced what you are going through or felt poorly they can not understand what the other person is going through.

I think it took me a while to come to terms with having to pace myself and accept the limitations that came with fatigue and pain .The biggest thing i had to learn was to be able to say the word no without feeling guilty if i didn't feel well enough to do things. I accessed the help of MIND i am not sure if there is one in your area it is a charity and should be on the internet Hope this helps.

Take care x

[TIDDLYF]

Hi i was reading chilli's comments and they are so true. I started looking on this site a few months ago. I never did that hello i'm new here, i just read everyone elses posts. The second or third time i was on here i realised i had tears running down my face because i realised i had found people who knew. They actually knew more than me about how i was feeling

I had told my family that at last i knew what was wrong with me 'fibro' but i didnt even understand it. All i knew was i felt like c**p and the tought of 20 yrs worth horrified me.

Reading posts from people who sometimes moaned, sometimes laughed and sometimes asked relevant questions i have learned so much about ME and how i feel, i am now quietly (and most importantly) less tearfully begining to understand about fibro. I would like to know what leaflets linksy is talking about though because i have been given nothing about fibro by anyone and explaining it to my family is still a work in progress.

Sorry lost the thread there but the point is i now feel "qualified" to comment on other peoples posts, so keep coming on here and i think you will learn to be kinder to yourself and not so negative.Good luck with it all but if those negative thoughts keep coming talk to your family, friends and GP about them, and dont be ashamed to ask for help.

[helensib]

I would like to thank everyone for their comments i'm so glad i found this sight love and huggs to you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Tibby3a]

I did attempt suicide in 2006. I think of it everyday when I am under stress and being shouted at by employers, by the person who is trying to keep me in work... then I go home and my partner says to keep her she wants nothing to do with my employer as they called her a lier on the phone when I came out of hospital in 2010, she ex boxer and judo for GB wanted to go and do something which may have resulted in me seeing her through a glass window for a long time. So I have a bad time at work and no one to talk to at home. This site does help in the small ways.