Getting a job with fibro, college and dont know what to do...

[fibrogirl41]

Hi hope you are alright, i just would like some advice about working, someone in my family made a conment that really upset me about working it made me feel low, i do want towork, go to college etc but worry whether ill be okay working, finding a job, managing my condition etc but i just wonder what to do, sometimes i feel like im lazy but i hope im not but anyway, just wanted to say how im feeling and hoping the college get back to me so i can get my life back x😔😭😎

[Debsdelight72]

Morning fibrogirl41

Let me guess, Why don't you help out? Why won't you get a job? Why do you look well ? If your ill and so tired, Why don't you? Why don't you? Why don't YOU??

it's just so frustrating trying to tell friends and family you are really ill and just because they don't feel your pain and feel your your total chronic exhaustion,

Don't you feel there's a lot of DON'Ts, If they fail to hear you maybe you should too? ear them too

They are maybe unable to listen whilst you try to explain how your feeling, Why don't you tell that person how you felt when they made these comments?

A lot of people just really find it difficult to ask questions and are afraid If they don't understand?

Why don't an awful lot of people just be kind and offer love and kindness to all?

It's totally up to you weather you feel well enough to go to work,How do you think you will cope? If the job will leave you a crumpled mess in the corner sobbing with pain and exhaustion every day and will push you to the limit?

Same with colllege? You may want to go back, The horrid brain fog will kick in and you won't keep up or be joining yourself in that same corner

DO whatever you want and follow your dreams,

I wish you the best fibrogirl41

Take care

Debs🤗

[fibrogirl41 in reply to Debsdelight72]

Thankyou i felt quite teary after but your comments have cheered me up x. Thanks for understanding x😊❤️

[Debsdelight72 in reply to fibrogirl41]

I've just noticed your other post,, I couldn't afford to pay for hydro treatment, Or a hydro bath,

But I did have the next best option, 30 pound from ebay , I can't remember what it's called at the moment sorry

Suckers to the bottom and multiple holes that force big bubbles, so I suppose it's like a poor man's jacuzzi The lable says bath spa??

Don't forget the different settings will change your level of water,

I did forget and flooded the bathroom, It's funny now but wasn't then,😆

[fibrogirl41 in reply to Debsdelight72]

Thanks, ill look into it, that cheered me up x🤣

[Devonl in reply to Debsdelight72]

oh where did you get that ? Sounds wonderful.😁

[Dinkie]

Disability grants might be worth a google. They supply grants and loans for college etc or disability support schemes within your college should be helping you. The job centre also have trained staff to advise. In our area we have Balance Employment Support a charity supporting folk to remain employed or to help them seek employment after working with them. Self referral service for Balance. Maybe there is something similar in your area.

I am fortunate in that I am still able to work, with reasonable adjustments in place, I know without it my mental health would suffer and physically I would be worse too.

Good luck hope you find a solution.

[fibrogirl41 in reply to Dinkie]

Thanks dinkie, ill have a look at those, see if it could help mex

[Devonl]

Hi fibrogirl41, I work with fibromyalgia it is hard work but, to be fair self satisfaction outlays the pain. You do what ever helps you and moving around helps but dont do too much or you will suffer worse. When you go to college explain and let them know you will have to move about sometimes. You will find what ever you do people will understand some adjustments may need to be done for you to be comfortable. Good luck and I hope you get that amazing job.

[TheBigYin84]

I still work.I gave up my career as a chef coming up on 2 years now. It was a hard decision to make.

Mainly because my fibro is at its worst in my hands and arms.

I'm a bus driver now, so it is possible.

Not saying it is for everyone. Totally depends on circumstances.

[RustyOBear]

Oh how this resonates! Family, who you hope would be supportive aren’t always understanding. As an invisible condition and the fact it can be variable from one day to the next confuses the picture.

You are not lazy, the fatigue is real. It’s easy to be down on yourself and it’s natural to feel frustrated when your body doesn’t cooperate with your wish to study or work. The one thing I’ve learned is that pacing yourself allows you to do more overall and pushing yourself leads to flare ups.

Maybe discuss this with your GP and see if they can refer you to a service that can explore the possibilities.

Your worth is more than whether you are employed or not. Being kind to yourself even when others aren’t is important to feeling positive.

Take care.

[MW07]

Hi, I totally sympathise. I've had very hurtful comments and behaviour from a range of people, including those very close to me - being told I'm "knackered like everybody else", or if only I changed my house / job / family / attitude, I wouldn't be unwell. GP saying I create my own symptoms. The list goes on. It can be crushing.

With regard to college and work, both have a legal duty of care if you declare a disability, which Fibromyalgia is. You can contact ACAS for advice, and the Equality Advisory and Support service. equalityadvisoryservice.com/

Good luck!

[fibrogirl41 in reply to MW07]

Thankyou, it made me feel like bursting into tears, anyway, feeling okay but fed up thankyou for the advice ill have a look at those x😊

[KimiJay in reply to fibrogirl41]

I hope you get your life back soon too fibrogirl41 and discover it to be still extraordinary and surprising. I felt moved by the previous comment from MW07 too. It's the kind people will help you get there and they are out there as are so many on this website with experience and wisdom about so much.

Turn around and literally walk right away from the meanies if you feel you can. Other people are beginning to grow in empathy and understanding more than ever before. But that brings stress and sadness. These folks don't need killjoys around them who don't, or won't, or can't weep, but they'll have you to listen and understand them and you will all be working for a better world and giving each other friendly feedback. - I'm sure many college teachers will need to feel they can make a difference for you and perhaps someone younger need you to be their good listener who really understands.

I hope the 'AHA!' moment crosses your path soon and gives you a direction that you feel truly free to choose or not.

[fibrogirl41 in reply to KimiJay]

Thankyou, that means alot x 💕

[KimiJay in reply to MW07]

I'll bet you would not wish your condition on that GP even so! - The cure for fibro is probably closer to you than a cure in attitude for all the meanies out there! ... I find it healing to read the compassionate comments and emotional support given to other sufferers on this website such as yours. Thanks for the hope that gives for humanity and its future.

[Phgc]

my sympathies i do understand its hard but be too hard on ur self n ignore people with negative comments Good Luck

[Smilesalot]

Oh sweetie😢 that person was very rude and doesn't understand Fibro or you🤗🤗🤗It's a while since someone said it to me but I understand the pain it causes.

Don't let them hurt you more !

Know ur worth sweetie 🙂.

Ur contending with so much. Wait for college to contact you. Or give it a week and ring them again if ur well enough.

Hugs sweetie Dawn 🤗🤗🤗

[fibrogirl41 in reply to Smilesalot]

Thankyou, i did feel very teary yesterday, i hope the college contact me soon, i hope i can do a course or something, so fed up with being at home but hopefully ill get there and one day get my own place x😊❤️