I look out for all the ways that I can to lessen the isolation that come with 20yrs of fibromyalgia.I know this is a worldwide challenge.

[Zivago74]

I am elderly,have connections but the time when friendships ,marriage and family existed is well past. I think we need to develope new mores ,incorporating technology for connection.I dont want to be a lonely dinosaur .I read of university studies and medical studies on loneliness.I think that when a problem reaches a certain level a momentum for change begins.I can talk about isolation and loneliness as it goes along with chronic health problems...but I know from talking and reading the wellest of people can be lonely.I remember when friendships were important and then that word seemed to be overtaken by relationships and the pressure to be in a relationship.I do my small best with tiny friendships!at the shop,on the bus.I have family who care for me but thats at a different level than a generational connection.I am an Anglican..irregular.I can feel most lonely among Christians as there is this..dont be your godgiven self,be a Good Person,and if you were really Christian your faith would make you well!My faith as I experience,helps me to accept my fibro etc,but to seek solutions.Im asking a lot of questions here I know.Too much?

[LoneEra]

Hi ☀️ You can certainly find some friends on here to talk to. It is difficult socialising when you have fibro. And yes, loneliness is an issue in society today. Not helped by lockdown situations of course.

I’m not a church goer so can’t comment. Do you have any hobbies at all? I like to walk with my big dog and that’s a good way to meet people. Here’s a photo for you..

Hairy dog smiling at the camera

[saluhouse in reply to LoneEra]

Hi Lone Era. What a gorgeous boy - and really photogenic. Obviously that’s his ‘I’m so ready for my photograph’ pose!Xxx

[LoneEra in reply to saluhouse]

Haha, you hit the nail on the head with the pose! And thank you - yes - he’s a sweetheart and hilarious too 🙂 Xxx

[Dizzytwo Moderator]

Hello and welcome, if you have not had time to read the forum guidelines. May I politely suggest you do.

One of the FMUK rules respectfully asks all members to remember

Religion and Politics should not be discussed here as it is hard to not offend someone in discussing these.

But please feel welcomed. This is a great group. The members are very friendly and always happy to share their experiences.

I see you've left your post unlocked to this community only for privacy reasons you may want to lock it. Also locked posts tend to get more replies.

If I can help you with anything please feel free to ask 😊

Momo

[flicka in reply to Dizzytwo]

Sorry about the Faith comment.

[saluhouse]

Hello Zivago. Sorry to read you feel so down. Fibro can isolate you because you often don’t feel well enough to get out and socialise.

But we are here. And you only have to tap out a message and someone is pretty much guaranteed to reply. Plus you don’t have to pretend to feel fine - which we all probably do when the family asks how we are. And it’s so interesting to read what other members write.

I’ve gained a lot of self-help tips on here (who knew stretching was such a good idea?). And lots of fellow sufferers have retained their daft sense of humour.

What I am saying is - there is a lot you can do to feel connected and you won’t even need to put your shoes on!

We aren’t elderly - just maturing nicely (like cheese).

Xxx

[Veganviews]

So identify with your words

[SusieSquirrel]

Hello Zivago74, I to identify with you. As the years go by friendships slip away faster than they would do without a chronic illness. Now that I can no longer drive I feel even more isolated. Covid has done a right one on people's mental health. But covid plus chronic pain plus no longer driving has me very depressed at the moment. I was always a 'home bird' but now home is like a prison

[Makie-Uppie]

Everybody is in the same boat on here, and a lot who are not on here, so you are not alone.Funny thing personally is the COVID thing other than making the streets quieter had little or no effect on my day to day life.I appeared here a few months ago and have found it quite good, I think the F-word and finding out that others are the same and a lot of them are worse knocks the rough edges off us all.

This make people on here pretty tolerant of a little moaning and intolerant of those who would be nasty. So I don't think trolls would last too long on here, though I do have a couple with baseball bats banging on my head at the moment, but those are of the invisible kind.

As for those do gooders that tend to blame every ill in the world on people not following a certain set of rules, I don't think they have any place here. Unless of course they have the F-word, then they can comment of that and keep the other for another place.

They do tend to float around like vultures, some do good but a lot of them are just promoting the cause. So I trend to ignore them.

Take care and have a good moan, to be taken as required.

[Midori]

It can be difficult when you reach a certain age and you realise that those around are passing on, and suddenly there is nobody to reminisce with!

Through this effect I suddenly realised that I am now the Matriarch of my family! Scary!

Covid has been a nightmare for me, as I moved home, 300 miles to Wales, just before the first lockdown and I've been itching to get out and explore!

It has also been ruinous to my fitness, my walking ability has decreased because of it is difficult anyway as I use a rollator. I've had a couple of falls lately in Tesco, by tripping over my own feet! Can't use a wheelchair here as I wouldn't be able to get my shopping up the hill! Don't drive any more due to failing sight. Found the higher registers of my hearing are gone, so I cannot hear the thermometer beep!

On the plus side, I'm now in a bungalow, so no stairs! Keep looking at ads for stair lifts and laughing!

Fully jabbed, so theoretically I can get out more, but t'ain't easy! Have friends around the area, but don't like to bother them for lifts and things, I have a horror of becoming too dependent and being a nuisance; they all have their own lives, but I keep up via Facebook and emails.

Hopefully classes will start up again soon and I can get back to learning Welsh, and hopefully the Crochet club will start again.

I may be almost alone (my son is my carer), but I'm certainly not lonely.

Cheers, Midori

[Bakgri]

Agree completely, for me the loneliness is a feeling of isolation, as despite living in a busy house I dont think as anyone “gets” it and although I have some close friends, they think it c ant be that bad as I look normal. I have a support group at work for long term conditions and that helps too but no close supportive friends who get it and thats lonely. Has anyone tried to go to fibro support groups pre pandemic and did that help?

[flicka]

Having Faith wont make us well but will help us along. Good luck, being old is not for wimps, I am 80 this year! x