Hi, my name is Leigh, and I was in pain since a small child. Depressed since the age of 21. Rock bottom was at 40 years old, stuck on the floor one morning, screaming with pain unable to move.
That was the changing point in my life. I knew I couldn't go on as I was. Pilates and swimming (very gentle and slow) 3 months in, my depression lifted one day as I stood up from a roll-down. It was that dramatic I could feel how all my mental issues were due to the chronic pain.
Over the last 2 1/2 years I have learned to use the correct muscles - the 5 main muscles of movement. Starting from, and always working from my Base-Line muscles. Pelvic floor Base, rectus abdominis line. Our core pillar of strength.
Slowly I have released the physical tensions on my body, reliving and then releasing all the pain I had been carrying around. Regaining my natural range of movement, balancing my body. Feeling my true alignment based on the anatomical structures on the median plane - starting with the linea alba, then nuchal and supraspinous ligaments.
Feeling better than I ever have before, so I am here to share my story in the hope that it will help other suffers to learn to feel how to heal themselves.
Leigh
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LeighBlyth
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healthunlocked.com/fibromya.... Morning I have read your post with interest always good to find ways to improve our mental well being and our health have you fibromaylia?
My 'fibro' diagnosis is both self-diagnosed and retrospective. I was too young to voice my pain when it started.
From the sudden itches and biting sensations, jolts of electricity shooting through my limbs, the pins and needles, the intense spasms and stabbing pains.
The aching limbs that exhausted quickly, the cramps, the 'stitches' in my sides whenever I ran, regularly waking with a stiff neck.
These were all just a part of normal life to me. I had no pain-free time to compare to and I saw other people in pain, so it didn't even occur to me there shouldn't be pain.
As individual symptoms they were easily dismissed - I must have sat/slept funny, I'd overdone it, I'd injured myself (I was both clumsy and adventurous). If I had an explanation for the pain once, I didn't mention it again (peril of a quick learner). The weird sensations and spasms came and went, curiosities - observing the pain as my foot would spasm - How long could I bear it? What toe be pulled in what direction this time?.
The painful knees by the time I was 8, my back pain classified as chronic at 14. There was constant pain of one sort or another.
I kept on going, adding more damage to my body which became increasingly imbalanced and tense due to the adaptations in my connective tissue. Layer upon layer of restrictions bracing me and holding me rigid restrictive, like a scaffold. Zig-zagging from left to right, inside to out, front to back.
Chains of tension - twisting and and kinking, compressing and tensing, the whole length of my body as it tried to remain 'upright'. I didn't appreciate how much movement I lacked until I started to regain it.
The physical tensions throughout my body, caused a lot of pain and weird sensations.
At some point I started to struggle to believe the pain was real. That I was not faking it (for attention? I tried not to be sympathy seeking), or imagining it somehow. Life couldn't really be this painful. I doubted myself, hypochondria
The chronic pain left me in a deep depression that lasted nearly 2 decades, the overwhelming feelings of failure and despair constantly with me. I found no joy in anything, a deep sadness always there, with the stress and anger bubbling away, I blamed myself for everything.
Learning to use my muscles correctly, centered around my Base-Line pelvic floor and rectus abdominis has changed my life.....
So glad that you have found a way that works for you. I also go everyday to a combination of Pilates & Yoga. My strength & flexibility are very much improved & as you say I feel much more in balance with my body. However, my fibromyalgia still causes me as much pain as it ever did. The main benefit that I get is a more mindful approach to my symptoms. The problem is that Fibromyalgia is different for each person. I wish you well & hope everything continues to improve.
Pilates was my intro to finding my muscles - Joseph Pilates figured out how to use the main muscles of movement, he just didn't get the anatomical basis of it.
I couldn't do most (any) exercises. I could see others straining to do the next level but I'd been so frightened by my rock-bottom I kept to the very basic level really focusing on my 'core' at the time (not a term I like to use).
As I unravelled the physical mess I was in I had to relive all the pain stored on my body. I could feel the pains moving just a little every day as I became more balanced and aligned.
It wasn't all fun....
A year into my "healing" my back was so bad I spent a week in bed, someone bringing me a bucket as needed.... Taking morphine to constipate me (it never touched the pain) and my water intake reduced to the bare minimum. I had to release some tension in my upper body before my back could improve some more.
It's not a quick fix, I had pain all the time but after my depression lifted I knew I was recovering.
Have a look at the anatomy - go-ogle images for each of the main muscles. Think about them as you do your Yoga and Pilates and see what happens over time.
Glad you are on the mend. I've gone through same 3 times now, had 6years between first two flares one for 3days could not move at all, thought I was paralysed, 2nd one was around 3 weeks not as bad as first but lasted longer then 4 years. The last one lasted two years and was a doozie, was in wheelchair, needed stick to walk, I had every fibro symptom going can't explain how bad the pain was. Now, I'm still in pain but coping and constantly watching over my shoulder for next bad flare. Exercise and mindfulness do help but exercise in moderation when having a good day. All the best to you glad you are doing so well.
"I can't explain how bad the pain was". I get it. I struggle for words for the web of pain that seared though my body. OK there's a few words but unless you've experienced it you just don't get it
During my recovery it felt like I had to relive all the pain I was carrying around to release it, but without the depression I had hope and the pain is was easier to bare.
I hope you try focusing on your pelvic floor and rectus abdominis Base-Line, working with your breathing. It sounds like you'll be in for a rough ride but it'll be worth it..
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