Christmas Pain Plans: I was just... - Fibromyalgia Acti...

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Christmas Pain Plans

JacquiRo profile image
24 Replies

I was just wondering.. any great tips for surviving Christmas and Boxing Day with judgmental people ?

How do you cope?

So not good at the moment .. in terrible pain and all I want to do is rest but try to force myself to keep going..

Some at the pain clinic said when bad push yourself !!! I feel it is making me worse so not only physically tired I am mentally also.

Healing love and light

Merry Christmas xx

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JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo
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24 Replies
rosie-2015 profile image
rosie-2015

I definitely don't push myself, that's the worse thing to do, the best thing to do is relax but it's also the hardest. Can you go into your bedroom with some hot chocolate and some soothing music and just lie on your bed for a while, I know it sounds simplistic but sometimes the simple methods are the best

Rosie 😊 xx

M0AL61 profile image
M0AL61ModeratorVolunteer

Could you excuse yourself from people's company by saying that you need to go and lie down for a while, or say that you have a migraine.

I know it's easier said than done, but try not to stress too much.

I hope that you will be able to cope ok.

Hi J, it’s a catch 22 isn’t it. Who do we please them or us, or do we suffer in silence. My motto would be . No don’t push yourself, pace, if others don’t except your pain, sorry I have to rest. If they don’t like it or understand it. Just say. Have you ever suffered muscular pain. Well my whole body has it. 10 fold. Sometimes their reaction is shock. So sorry for you. I hope you manage to enjoy some of it. Take care. Happy Christmas and new year I hope 🤞. Xx

Lizzyear profile image
Lizzyear

Hello,

It is difficult, but I agree, pushing yourself is the worst thing you can do in my opinion.

I have people staying over Christmas and I must have had an epiphany moment, as this year I have totally stepped back. I have already told people I will need to take an afternoon nap/rest. Also I will not be able to stay up late. Forewarned is forearmed as they say. You have to listen to your body. I think you find out your real friends and family support lay when you have fibro! I’m going through a terrible and long flare, I have no option but to relax the reins, (I am a terrible control freak by nature) I also have my own business, but I am learning, I just can’t do what I used to. So now I am more accepting of my frustrating limitations! I am lucky I have a very supportive hubby and family and I know other people have far more of a struggle with no support network.

Make sure you rest over Christmas, if they love you and want you as well as you can be, so you may have to have a bit of a break or lie down. It might be worth telling them about the ‘spoons’ analoby?

I wish you and everyone else on this sight a Happy Christmas 🎄 and hope 2018 will be a gentle and kind year. Gentle hugs 🤗 xxx

JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo in reply toLizzyear

Hi Lizzy what's the spoons anology? Xxx

in reply toJacquiRo

You only have so many spoons of energy per day.

Say it's 12. Getting up takes 2, showering and dressing 2, taking meds 2, cooking a meal and eating it 3. You can see how they disappear. Go over your allotted 12 and you're borrowing from tomorrow.

It's a good way to learn to pace yourself. If you search Spoon Theory online or on Pinterest, there's lots of info and charts.

JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo in reply to

I will thank you sounds interesting x

in reply toLizzyear

totally agree, and i learnt that the only real friends i have are indeed online. my friends IRL didn't want to know me anymore or even try to understand and they literally disappeared from my life in an instant. glad i have husband for support or i'd go completely (christmas) crackers!

JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo

Now I know that I must rest .. but what I found was when I went to the pain management clinic they said to push yourself when bad.... They clearly DON'T have fibro as I am exhausted and in pain. I don't want to go to families on Boxing Day... too far for me to come home and no way could I ask to rest their.. I normally stay out the way and wash up etc but blow that... I am NOT doing that anymore as the last few meetings they have said we have left you the washing up! (B*****dy cheek if you ask me)

They have family gatherings In the gardens in the blazing sun in summer and with my temp gauge and not liking the sun too much I stay in the kitchen and wash up etc well now 19 years later stuff it!!

Awake again in pain I am stressing about Boxing Day as I don't want to go... sigh. No my husband would go mad if I said no 😌

But healing love and light to all xxx

deejames profile image
deejames in reply toJacquiRo

That's bizarre that the Pain clinic said push yourself. My pain management course was all about pacing. Fi ding and recognising your limit and going to just before that point.

JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo in reply todeejames

It was my first visit and waiting what else they have to say.. would be good if they had a dr that actually had it would t it!! X

Queen-sab profile image
Queen-sab in reply todeejames

Is it easy to be referred to the pain clinic?

JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo in reply toQueen-sab

Took me ages .. just keep asking your gp... just keep pestering them xx

deejames profile image
deejames in reply toQueen-sab

It can take some time depending on your area. But worth doing.

Queen-sab profile image
Queen-sab in reply todeejames

I'm going on Monday to pester the doc. I'm tired of feeling weak

Fibrolife profile image
Fibrolife

Lizzyear you are so right, I am one without a support network, not even my mom, so I will be home alone like last year. They started not including me in Holiday's at home. My brother and I live in the same town which is about 2 hours fro my mom. I found out she was inviting him and his girlfriend to several parties and Holidays, and did not include me. It has taken me a while to forgive them and I told them that , but I am Dead to them. This has been about 8 years now. First I was hurt and upset, then I was mad, and now I don't give a flip. I am blessed everyday, and god has brought me through it! Amen!

JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo in reply toFibrolife

Where do you live Lizzy? Xx

Queen-sab profile image
Queen-sab in reply toFibrolife

I'm sorry to hear that, you can't choose your family unfortunately. I hope you spend it with friends. X

in reply toFibrolife

Sadly i know what that feels like, i spent three christmases completely alone with no one to talk to and i have a fairly big family brother sisters etc. not one of them invited me to anything. they just left me. and i understand the pain and almost resentment that you feel when your family just ignore you like that- mine have been doing that to me for years, but like you as well i now don't give a flip! let them have their stupid parties, i'm too darn ill to go anyway! lol

Fibrolife profile image
Fibrolife in reply to

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Finally someone who understands me. We definitely have to stay in touch especially during the Holiday's.

God bless you my Fibro Friend! 🎄☃️

hf1981 profile image
hf1981

Definitely do not push yourself! I find that lying down for 10 minutes in the quiet really helps but if you need more then you need more! Listen to your body and not other people! Have a lovely time and be good to you!🎄🎁

ingart profile image
ingart

For years I suffered and still do but now I do all Xmas shopping online and delivered and pre prepared food helps a lot. This year little Xmas wrapping chore sorted by buying voucher gifts ie afternoon tea out gift vouchers etc. Try to think of any ways round problems and chores and in preparing for Xmas alot yourself only one task a day to do.

dannyxox profile image
dannyxox

Try not to push urself I find makes me worse xx take care xx

JacquiRo profile image
JacquiRo

My Boxing Day has been cancelled by my husband and that is sooooo good for me!

Merry Christmas all xx

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