I definitely don't push myself, that's the worse thing to do, the best thing to do is relax but it's also the hardest. Can you go into your bedroom with some hot chocolate and some soothing music and just lie on your bed for a while, I know it sounds simplistic but sometimes the simple methods are the best
Could you excuse yourself from people's company by saying that you need to go and lie down for a while, or say that you have a migraine.
I know it's easier said than done, but try not to stress too much.
I hope that you will be able to cope ok.
Hi J, it’s a catch 22 isn’t it. Who do we please them or us, or do we suffer in silence. My motto would be . No don’t push yourself, pace, if others don’t except your pain, sorry I have to rest. If they don’t like it or understand it. Just say. Have you ever suffered muscular pain. Well my whole body has it. 10 fold. Sometimes their reaction is shock. So sorry for you. I hope you manage to enjoy some of it. Take care. Happy Christmas and new year I hope 🤞. Xx
It is difficult, but I agree, pushing yourself is the worst thing you can do in my opinion.
I have people staying over Christmas and I must have had an epiphany moment, as this year I have totally stepped back. I have already told people I will need to take an afternoon nap/rest. Also I will not be able to stay up late. Forewarned is forearmed as they say. You have to listen to your body. I think you find out your real friends and family support lay when you have fibro! I’m going through a terrible and long flare, I have no option but to relax the reins, (I am a terrible control freak by nature) I also have my own business, but I am learning, I just can’t do what I used to. So now I am more accepting of my frustrating limitations! I am lucky I have a very supportive hubby and family and I know other people have far more of a struggle with no support network.
Make sure you rest over Christmas, if they love you and want you as well as you can be, so you may have to have a bit of a break or lie down. It might be worth telling them about the ‘spoons’ analoby?
I wish you and everyone else on this sight a Happy Christmas 🎄 and hope 2018 will be a gentle and kind year. Gentle hugs 🤗 xxx
Say it's 12. Getting up takes 2, showering and dressing 2, taking meds 2, cooking a meal and eating it 3. You can see how they disappear. Go over your allotted 12 and you're borrowing from tomorrow.
It's a good way to learn to pace yourself. If you search Spoon Theory online or on Pinterest, there's lots of info and charts.
totally agree, and i learnt that the only real friends i have are indeed online. my friends IRL didn't want to know me anymore or even try to understand and they literally disappeared from my life in an instant. glad i have husband for support or i'd go completely (christmas) crackers!
Now I know that I must rest .. but what I found was when I went to the pain management clinic they said to push yourself when bad.... They clearly DON'T have fibro as I am exhausted and in pain. I don't want to go to families on Boxing Day... too far for me to come home and no way could I ask to rest their.. I normally stay out the way and wash up etc but blow that... I am NOT doing that anymore as the last few meetings they have said we have left you the washing up! (B*****dy cheek if you ask me)
They have family gatherings In the gardens in the blazing sun in summer and with my temp gauge and not liking the sun too much I stay in the kitchen and wash up etc well now 19 years later stuff it!!
Awake again in pain I am stressing about Boxing Day as I don't want to go... sigh. No my husband would go mad if I said no 😌
That's bizarre that the Pain clinic said push yourself. My pain management course was all about pacing. Fi ding and recognising your limit and going to just before that point.
Lizzyear you are so right, I am one without a support network, not even my mom, so I will be home alone like last year. They started not including me in Holiday's at home. My brother and I live in the same town which is about 2 hours fro my mom. I found out she was inviting him and his girlfriend to several parties and Holidays, and did not include me. It has taken me a while to forgive them and I told them that , but I am Dead to them. This has been about 8 years now. First I was hurt and upset, then I was mad, and now I don't give a flip. I am blessed everyday, and god has brought me through it! Amen!
Sadly i know what that feels like, i spent three christmases completely alone with no one to talk to and i have a fairly big family brother sisters etc. not one of them invited me to anything. they just left me. and i understand the pain and almost resentment that you feel when your family just ignore you like that- mine have been doing that to me for years, but like you as well i now don't give a flip! let them have their stupid parties, i'm too darn ill to go anyway! lol
Definitely do not push yourself! I find that lying down for 10 minutes in the quiet really helps but if you need more then you need more! Listen to your body and not other people! Have a lovely time and be good to you!🎄🎁
For years I suffered and still do but now I do all Xmas shopping online and delivered and pre prepared food helps a lot. This year little Xmas wrapping chore sorted by buying voucher gifts ie afternoon tea out gift vouchers etc. Try to think of any ways round problems and chores and in preparing for Xmas alot yourself only one task a day to do.
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