Drowning....

[RealTSM]

....in depression....I can't seem to stop crying....trying to kick myself up the proverbial but I peak up n flop back down further....I don't know what's wrong with me....scared....but I gotta face my fears....I wish I could jump in the car n go for a drive....that always makes me feel better....oops....I lost that over a year n a half ago....stuck at home most of the time....I need a slap....

[margaretjo]

Have you seen a doctor but hang on in thete you are not alone any time you need to talk i am here ive been through it and know how it feels take care

[RealTSM in reply to margaretjo]

Hiya Margaretjo, I ended up getting an emergency Dr appointment on Friday as I finally broke. Still feeling a bit delicate but I'm here....it's a horrid, horrid, scarey feeling....thank you sooooo much for your kind words x

[Hidden]

No you do not need a slap you need someone to talk to and perhaps a change in medication. As Margaret. said there is always someone to talk to here, even if it is only to let off steam. I agree with her when she asked about seeing a doctor. what we can do is send is lots of hugs and the reasurance that we are here for you . sue xxx

[RealTSM in reply to Hidden]

Thanks MaryRose54, I feel very reassured by my virtual hugs....there had been a mix up with my meds, in fact the request was rejected because I was due a review....of course no one told me....I was in a bad place....I just sat waiting for my meds as I've been sick for a fortnight....didn't realise until my mood got so low and violent that there was sommink missing!! I range the Dr in a panic Friday early evening so panicked that I was gonna hurt myself....confused, bawling and shaking....my poor 11 year old daughter had to witness this (which I feel so guilty about)....my 20 year old son just walked off n left us as he can't handle it!!!!

Big hugs x x x x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Hi Real I have just re-read my post.I am sorry that it seems to be very blunt. But then thats the way I am.

I was angry when I wrote it, not at you but at a society that makes sick people feel as though ir`s their fault. that they are ill, and as you put needs a kick up the backside or a slap. That is the last thing anybody needs.

Ok Rant over and I am so pleased that things have been sorted out and that you are feeling much better

Lots of hugs sue xxxx.

[Hidden]

Hi RealTSM

It's very sad to hear that depression is getting you so down I've been living with depression/anxiety for 20+ years and to begin with it interfered with everything in my life.

I know how to manage it now and I have a good counsellor that I can see when I need to talk to someone, vent my anxieties going on at that time.

I think it is a good idea to go and have a chat with your GP about how you feel together you can work out a way to combat your problem whether it be with medications and/or therapies. Also MIND offer good services too

Relaxation time set into you daily routine may be good for you. I'm a strong advocate of relaxation for many reasons, firstly because my/your body mimics sleep so has the chance to heal a little, secondly it re-charges my/your battery giving me a little more 'oomph' for the next part of the day and thirdly to reduce my/your stress and anxiety as it has nasty affects on our health. All of the aforementioned can be related to why we become depressed, not being mobile, in pain, fatigued and stressed, all of them affect our mood.

This is a link to one of my posts: RELAXATION TECHNIQUE - Muscular relaxation AND Planned times for regular positive relaxation I thought you may be interested to take a look

healthunlocked.com/fibroact...

This is a link to another of my posts: RELAXATION TECHNIQUE - Guided Imagery and Visualisation Relaxation, which I also thought you may be interested in

healthunlocked.com/fibroact...

In the meantime, if you feel really low and would like to talk to someone you could call the Samaritans: 08457 90 90 90 their website is: samaritans.org

Wishing you wellness, healing and smiles

xxxsianxxx you're not alone xx

[denvajade in reply to Hidden]

great reply, I agree whole heartily.

[RealTSM in reply to Hidden]

Absolutely lovely Sian, so reassuring. My situation is very similar to yours hun....I have been a sufferer of depression, stress and anxiety for just over 19 years. I have have an amazing psychotherapist and numerous counsellor's....I know the signs and what to do but for some reason I just didn't catch on until it was too late....I think....Fibro fog, illness,etc....meant I wasn't listening to my panicked Angel but my devious lil Devil!! My Angel screamed so loud and panicky I did reach out and I did end up getting a very nice Dr that saw me immediately. I will most definitely follow your links for the relaxation techniques, I'm currently on a CALM's programme at Lewisham Hospital which aims to teach you how to live a relatively manageable life with chronic pain....

I'm still a bit delicate but just trying to be gentle with myself and kindly asked those around me to be patient too....

Thank you huni x x x x

[Hidden in reply to RealTSM]

That's good hunny I am pleased that you have arranged something and hey! we don't always spot our triggers straight away so don't feel bad

Good luck with the course and hope you get as much as you can from it, I learned lots on my pain management course including how important relaxation is everyday. Do let me know how you get on and please get in touch if you have any Q's

Relaxing lavneder fluffies heading your way

xxxsianxxx

[Ginsing]

Hi Real TSM

It is not unusual to suffer with depression when you have Fibro. Are you on anything from the doctor at the moment.

I take Duloxetine an find it is very effective stops everything toppling in on me.

Go see you GP soon as you can see what he thinks they can be very helpful

xgins

[Hidden in reply to Ginsing]

Fancy a cuppa gins ???

I think I've seen kettle about

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Any bickies going?

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

What kind would you like? crunch creams?

[RealTSM in reply to Ginsing]

Hi Gins....I'm on setraline but due to a mix up I was without them for nearly two weeks and I was in fact going through an unplanned "withdrawal" which....with a whole load of other stuff going on I didn't realise until I reached breaking point. Thankfully I got an emergency appointment, my antidepressants and some much needed sleeping tablets (short term). Thanks huni x x

[Ginsing]

Oh yes please Zeb is it yorkshire tea? Mines white no sugar thanks!

Managed to find ginger biscuits fancy one .............(Offers the Packet across ciber space)

Any one else joining us Maryrose -Margaret _ Real ??

[Hidden in reply to Ginsing]

Shouldn`t really have any more bickies. selling fig rolls 2for 1 and i have made a pig of myself and scoffed a whole packet full slapped wrists

[Hidden in reply to Ginsing]

ginger biscuits, yum thanks

here's your cuppa sorry it took so long xx

[Ginsing in reply to Hidden]

Well stewed but the biccies are good afraid never liked fig roll.:P)

[Hidden]

Don't be hard on yourself. You'll get through this, but not by kicking yourself up the proverbial. Maybe some of these suggestions might help? Find a sympathetic doctor and get some help. Or call a friend to talk it through. Counselling can be great for anyone and especially for people with chronic pain (I've been for counselling twice and found it extremely helpful). It's nothing to be ashamed of. Fibro is awful and hard to live with. Love yourself. Give yourself a treat (I bought myself a £4 pair of earrings this week as a reward for getting through something I found hard). Write a journal. Pray. Be safe and well x

[RealTSM in reply to Hidden]

Apple4me, thank you for your absolutely beautiful and thoughtful reply....you made me smile....

Journals are one of my major bug bears (bad experience) but I have started (again) doing my 'to do lists' and treating myself when I've achieved something. I know the signs but the break came when I was trying so hard to stay safe....it only took one trigger and I was broken. I'm recovering now though n trust me....I prayed hard....so very hard.

Big hugs x x x x

[Hidden in reply to RealTSM]

Hi RealTSM. Thank you for replying to my reply! I'm glad you're trying journalling again and doing your 'to do' lists! I find the journal a good check on my activities. If I've done too much (as I often do) then over a period of days I'll see the pattern emerging and I'll be able to be stricter with myself in pacing. It's also helpful to pour out my woes! You know, the kind of woes that your husband/ kids/ family/ friends don't want to hear again for the hundredth time! Counsellors are great for that too. Poor souls are paid to listen to our woes! Hoping you'll make progress and things will seem brighter soon. A xx

[TheAuthor]

Hi RealTSM

I have read your post with so much pain and sorrow for what you are going through at this time, and I genuinely hope that you can find some resolution and relief to all of the torments that you are enduring.

I see that zeb73 has given you the telephone number for the Samaritans out of her friendship and genuine concern. I would implore you to ring them, and tell them everything that you have told us here. You clearly need to release so much pain and anguish and they are totally confidential.

Please take care and let us know how you are getting on?

All my hopes and dreams for you

Ken x

[Cookie72]

Morning realTSM depression is part of fibro, so no u don't need a slap, you need to either come talk to us loony lot, or go see you GP for some antidepressants which also help with pain, I take Sertralin , ....or as zeb says go see a councillor, this bummer of a deseas is enough to make any one cry, so don't beat your self up about it, we are all here for you we are what I call a " caring, sharing, loving, laughter fibro club "" and damn good one at that, put us all together and you'll have a huge shoulder to cry on lol, it's. brilliant site, we are all going or have been thru what you are going thru, I've had it for over 50 + years and still manage to burst into tears for what I call no reason. ....sometimes I feel sooo low, then I come on here and somebody says something loony, especially our gins and zeb and that makes you smile and it helps, so come on here daily and I bet sometime thru the day they will make you smile....look forward to your posts...sending you gentle hugs and a large handful of sunshine....Dee xxx

[ninjananna]

I cannot put into words how much I'm feeling for you right now I have suffered from clinical depression for nearly 30 years, I to wanted to kick myself up the wotsit and "pull myself together" but that's easier said than done! Be kind to yourself and please get advise and support from your Dr. Medication really does help, its finding the one that suits you best and please believe me when I say " things will get better" I take amitriptylin a few hours before bed so I can sleep properly and just pain killers during the day. We are always on here for you to talk to and if you'd prefer to inbox certain people you can do this as well. The other bit of advise I can give is, when you go to the Dr, write everything down!! I often end up crying before I've sat down! This way the Dr can see what's happening with you and hopefully get the ball rolling! Much love....ninja...xxx