I settled down in my nice cosy bed, closed my book upon the bedside table, and dimmed the lamp. I yawned, closed my eyes, and started to think about tomorrow’s shopping list. I always find this more effective than counting sheep.
I was just dropping off to sleep, when I thought I saw a movement at the door. I was horrified to see a tall, thin figure standing there, wrapped in a black cloak!
“Who’s that?” I screeched, flicking on my bedside lamp.
“Don’t make thuch a futh!” came the reply ”and turn that lamp down, it’th hurting my eyeth!
“What .. who ... what d’you want?” I quavered, pulling the duvet up to my chin.
“Thurely you can recognithe me?” said the tall figure, swishing back his cloak and revealing thick, black hair with a silver streak in the centre. He was deathly pale, and his eyes burned terrifyingly red.
“Well, you .. look a bit like Count Dracula” I gasped, “but ... you don’t ... sound quite right!”
The tall figure searched around in the pocket of his cloak for a moment, withdrew a set of dentures, and inserted them between his thin, bloodless lips.
“That’th right – Dennith, Count Dracula at your thervith! I know I don’t thound ath I should – my falth teeth are a very poor fit, you thee!” He hissed.
“Can’t you get a dentist to fix them?” I asked tremulously.
Count Dracula removed the top set and held them up to the light. The long, pointed canines were terrifying – icy white and nearly three inches long!
“No “ he said sadly. “All the dentitht I have approached are too cowardly – they shut up shop ath thoon ath I try to make an appointment!
He slumped down despondently on the end of my bed, which I thought was a terrible cheek, as I hadn’t asked him to take a seat! I was at loss for words, when suddenly inspiration gripped me.
“Would you like a cup of tea?” I asked, as kindly as I could.
The Count’s ashen features took on a pained expression, and he shook his head.
“Thank you dear, but I can’t bear the thtuff! Don’t thuppothe you’ve got a drop of Ribena on the go, have you? Or port? I don’t mind that!”
~~~~~
Well my dears - I've started the story - over to you!
Bring out your werewolves, ghouls, ghosties and zombies - not to mention the odd vampire to keep Count Dennis company - he would also like to know if you can put him in touch with a good (and courageous) dentist!
Remember, the budget for fibrofantasies is unlimited, so choose your salary as director, producer, star, whatever you like, and we'll have a spooky night to remember ...... Mwahaha!
Written by
ladymoth
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22 Replies
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For some reason I happened to be wandering around the volunteers with at midnight and saw a dim light under Moffys door upon heating a mans voice I got jealous and burst in... Dennis ... I gasped ... What are you doing in Moffys bedroom .. Your dentures will never pierce Moffys neck ...
VG ..he replied how did you get a volunteers job being a vampire.... ??? We females have brains I cooly replied .. I changed my name from Vampire Goldfish to Very Grumpy ...At night I merely pretend I am a phirana and no one notices the difference I am so grumpy anyway ... No one notices the odd snap... At this point our conversation was interrupted by a loud snore.... Moffy had gone to sleep.....
Typical ... So I took Dennith ... I mean Dennis out into the toolshed and and hunted for a file to modify his dentures. To be sharper and a better fit.....
Next time you see Dennith please could you ask if he has a rather more handsome friend/relative please. Fed up looking tired and dull and quite fancy being turned so I can go out and be all sparkly in the sunshine x
Hee hee. I giggled. Thank you Moff and Vampire Goldfish!
I will send a carrier bat to Albert .... He is so devastatingly handsome he makes Edward Cullen look dull and boring ... Unfortunately most vampires are so old their names do hark back to an earlier century
Well vampires are the 'in thing' at the moment, aren't they - especially good-looking sparkly ones like Edward Cullen. Did you know that Dennith is his grandfather?
Maude E. x
Dennith was my best friend when we were young when we played on the streets dodging the Hanson cabs .. It was fortunate we were both changed at the same time by a devastingly handsome vampire who looked a lot like Tom Cruise in a blonde wig........
Ooh - I loved that film. Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise as I recall? < dribbles longingly >
That is why I am glad a I am vampire goldfish .. Fish are cannibals so it is easy for me to sneak into an unsuspecting fish tank at night ... Feast on The fish and leave before the owners wake in the morning and find a tank full of dead fish
I am sure you were mithtaken , it wasn't Count D, it was me, Darth Vadar. in that swirling clock. Methinkith Moffy hath been at the red wine again. And there is something very fishy about VG visit to my aquarium. I was about the have my weekly fish pedicure but my fish are all floating upside down in the tank and a pair of false teeth are at the bottom.
I'm not sure if it's the fibro that's driven you crazy, Jilly, or us volunteers
Did you mention red wine? Yeth pleathe, large one for me!
Anyway, you have just put me off fish pedicures for ever
Moffy x
Shrieks and rinses her mouth with dettol I have been sucking the life out of fish with bits of people's feet in their mouths ...... Pass the red wine .... I need something for the shock !!!!
Pleath path the grog thith way, I've had a thock here today, tho anything for athithtance will be great fully retheived >>>>>> bumbles round in ever decreasing circles <<<<<<<
Foggy x
Oh my goodness foggy please tell me Dennis didnt drink too much port and turn up at yours naked under the cloak.... I have had words with him before but lack of blood makes him do very strange things
Oh Moffy & VG! Only just caught back up with this thread and laughed out loud at your "real" names. Took me right back to when I was young and my friend and I used to try and repel boarders by telling them our names were Ethel and Maud and acting all affronted when they laughed or failed to believe us. I also used to tell them I trained poodles for the circus when they asked what I did. Poor guys didn't stand a chance! (please imagine eveil smiley here) x
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Very sad day for me 😢😢
PIP face to face with Atos
Return of the prodigal!
