*Sensitive* Looking for advice please ref next FET after loss😢😢. To do another transfer with frozen embryos or to start new DE NGS cycle?

[Chinese13]

I would like to thank all of the kind and lovely people whom supported me recently. I hope you are all doing as well as you can on this truly difficult journey.

I recently lost my ivf miracle pregnancy at 6 weeks and I am totally devastated and heartbroken 😞😞. I had a DE double transfer of PGTA tested top graded embryos. I honestly couldn’t believe that I had a positive test and was over the moon. Sadly I had an awful lot of bad on going stress, which was unavoidable. My stress got worse when I received bad news when I was 4 +6 weeks pregnancy and started bleeding with cramping. The bleeding was on and off and my tests were still positive and I had pregnancy symptoms. At 6 weeks I had a further bleed with small clots and this is when I believe I lost the 2nd embryo.

I am totally heartbroken and struggling a lot but I was trying to look forward to my next transfer when I have grieved (I have some frozen embryos from the same DE cycle).

My clinic said my loss was probably due to my stress levels (also I was unable to rest due to work and home), also my lining was a bit thin at my transfer (7.3mm). Or due to chromosome issues with embryos (even though they were PGTA tested). I suffer with adenomyosis and my lining didn't get past 6.2 with my last cancelled transfer. I had a hysterscopy, endo scratch and was on down reg meds for 3 months, so this was my best chance of success and sadly I lost my miracle.

I was expecting my clinic to say come back in 3 months for my next transfer. However, they are now saying to start a new cycle with a new donor and also test the embryos with NGS instead of PGTA (all 24 chromosomes instead of 5). I didn’t even know this was available. This is so difficult to take in because I have 3 PGTA tested, good quality embryos, which I am being advised not to use. This is because of my loss they are suspecting a possible chromosome issue, although they also mentioned the stress and my lining. However it could have been because of my high stress levels and not been able to rest also. They have also advised to start a new NGS cycle because sadly my partner said we can only try one more time (one more transfer not cycle) so they are trying to increase my chances for my possibly last try. I can’t even face this right now.

Please can anyone share their advice, as it’s so hard to move to a new cycle without first trying one more transfer. Do you think stress and not resting can really cause a loss? Should I take their advice and move past my current embies that I have waiting? It’s so hard to know what to do when I potentially only have one last try🙏🙏.

I really hope my post doesn't cause upset to anyone going through the same.

Sending hugs to everyone needing one💗. Thank you for reading xx

[Lana89]

Hi lovely I’m sorry for your loss if I was you I would put the ones you have already back especially if there PGTA tested and see how you go first then if not then could do another De round with what there saying.

Maybe work on your lining walnuts Brazil nuts and Pom juice plenty of protein and ask about a Lubion injection aday if wasn’t on already xxx

[K_LNB]

My personal view is that stress would not cause a loss. Before I found out I was pregnant this time I went through a house move (including heavy lifting), and then toddler had an asthma attack with overnight A&E stay! As for the other part of your question I’m afraid I don’t know.

[Twiglet2]

this sounds like the clinic wanting more money to me! You have 3 PGTA tested ballasts and they want you to pay for another DE cycle and MORE testing? Absolutely not. I’m so sorry for your loss but that doesn’t mean any of these 3 won’t be your take home baby 🤗💜 xx

[nat55zt]

I am so sorry to hear about everything you’ve gone through.

As for the next steps I would insist on the transfer of the remaining embryos. What your clinic is saying does not make much sense. Even if the loss was due to some chromosomal abnormality it does not mean that one of the remaining embryos isn’t your miracle baby. Why on earth would you want to throw away tested top grade embryos???

They probably want more money. So if I were you I would transfer the embryos and it that fails, I would start another round of IVF with another clinic. This one sounds fishy.

[BlueEyedTabby]

Hi, I'm so sorry to hear all this, it sounds so tough. I just wanted to say that my first thought was how unkind it was for them to blame your stress. It's not your fault. Sending you big hugs xx