I've been counting down to today with quiet hope. I'd even made the mistake of thinking about how and when we might share our good news - I know the cardinal rule is to go one step at a time in this process, but I'm always planning forward and some habits are hard to break!
There's been no bleeding, I had implantation cramps around the right time as well as nausea and twinges around my stomach. It all seemed really positive.
OTD today and the test is negative, followed by a negative clear blue just to be certain. I don't feel as devastated or emotional as I expected, just so deflated and incredibly flat and disappointed. I know this is only our 2nd transfer (with a chemical pregnancy spontaneously in the middle) and many people have been through so many more disappointments than us, but it's bloody hard going.
I think the hardest part is waiting again afterwards for the next step. Due to the lab team being at capacity it's looking like August for our next transfer. Again, I know many people wait a lot longer, but it just feel like a stab in the gut knowing that it will be over 2 months until we can try again. We'll also be on frostie number 3 of our 4.
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DSPurple
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Hey, it is absolutely about your journey, so you feel what you need and express it. Everyone's experience is relative to their journey. Devastation is natural. We all want that child to be born, and I have visions of having a child and pondering what it would feel like one day.
The IVF journey is cruel and expensive, but hope is a sign that you want to keep going. Right now, taking care of what you need to feel better and peaceful is important. Don't let yourself think disallowed to feel down; that negative result always pierces the heart. I hope it now gives you time to recover your body, enjoy the summer, and plan for the next round. It is about working through each cycle, and pushing the Dr. to ensure protocol and tests are done to your satisfaction. You are remarkable for doing it.
It doesn't matter if it is your first BFN or your 7th....it is always heartbreaking.
I wish I was having some very wise and deep advice that could help you.....I think we all go through it in different ways and they are all valid. Some will say that focusing on being heathy for the next transfer helped them focus, others will say that they have enjoy some holiday with their partner and it helps them because they connected.
I was trying to think what have I done that helped me go through....and I do not know....I think that I have also try to focus my attention to other things because the fertility is out of my control....I can take the medication...I can try to eat healthy...but other than that...so there was a time I did crafts....that helps if you feel anxious as all your concentration is on that activity. After a few years of not reading I found again the love of reading....and now I am obsess reading and reading. Keep your mind occupied with things you enjoy.....I think that is what has helped me in the past.
So sorry DSPurple. It is so tough. Sometimes we don't break quite the way we expected but it doesnt mean we are breaking any less. Sometimes I find the day after a BFN much more emotional (especially if I had hope for a BFP up to test date) so just be kind to yourself and do whatever feels right to get through it between now and August x
I'm so sorry to hear about your negative test result. I also know how it is to be so hopeful, especially with all the positive signs, and it’s just really hard when things don't go as planned.
Waiting for the next step is agonizing, especially when you have to wait until August. Even though others might have longer waits, it doesn’t make your wait any less painful. Sending you lots of strength and positive thoughts as you go through the next few months. x
I bled before OTD on my first 2 transfers, so when I didn’t on my 3rd and had a big swollen belly I was convinced it was 3rd time lucky. That was one of the hardest BFNs for me.
You sound like a strong positive person, and that’s half the battle with IVF. I’m a believer in tue power of positivity and laws of attraction, so absolutely you should be dreaming of that positive outcome. There’s a book called The Secret. Worth a read.
Totally understand the frustration of the wait to try again. The next step was a big thing for me to keep me focused. I rushed straight to next transfer once and it was a disaster so take it as a positive and try and use time to get ready and relax.
Hi, I'm so sorry for your BFN ;( it is always heartbreaking and not what we wish for. I hope the time will pass quickly till your next transfer. I had a short break after my last BFN because it broke me to pieces I am glad for this short break but now I am worried as closer I am getting to starting a new cycle. I wish you all the strength I can and that your next transfer will give you the best BFP you can get! 🙏
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2ww now over
Negative test, cramping
Negative test this morning
OTD negative , heartbroken 
