How many DE FETs before BFP?

[Eswyn]

TTC for a sibling but experiencing secondary infertility due to low ovarian reserve.

After unsuccessful rounds with my own eggs we’ve moved to DE and did our first DE FET this week. But I’m now panicking that it won’t work. The clinic told us that this donor’s eggs have led to a successful live birth, but it took ‘several transfers’. I’m surprised they told us this level of detail and also wished they’d have said something BEFORE we’d got to FET stage.

We only have three embryos and none of them are tested because our clinic doesn’t believe it’s needed for young eggs. Our embryos are also average quality (3BB). I guess after years of being told that my eggs were the issue, I assumed using DE would mean amazing results, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.

Looking for some reassurance to remain hopeful. Just wondered how many DE FETs you had before getting a BFP?

Thanks!

[Kitkat10]

Hi Eswyn

I am in a similar position to you, I had a baby with OE in 2021, then had no luck with three more transfers with OE. Moved to DE when I turned 43, and I’m 8 weeks pregnant with the first attempt 🤞🤞

The DE embryo was a 4BB. My own embryos were 5AB and 5AA and didn’t work so the younger genetics of the DE certainly seem to be more important than the subjective embryo grading. I felt very similar to you and opted for a refund option as I was skeptical about the whole thing but… 🤞🤞 it’s definitely much more likely only to take you 1-2 attempts. Best of luck this is your time 🤞🤞🍀🍀

[Eswyn in reply to Kitkat10]

Thank you for replying, and congratulations on your BFP!! I really hope it’s finally our time. You’re completely right about the grading being subjective. When you want something as much as we do it’s easy to obsess over every detail. Trying my best to focus on the fact that the DE has worked once before, so there’s a good chance it will again. Also, we’ve never had any embryos to freeze with OE, so already things are way better. Just need to keep it together and not to lose my mind during the TWW xx

[Btown98]

Hey there- I was in the exact same boat. Used DE for a sibling and had three average quality embryos non-tested. I was devastated when the first one didn’t work because I also thought it would be much easier. The second transfer was a day 6 average quality embryo who is now a wild 2 year old

I know it’s hard because you’ve already been through a lot when you get to the stage of DE and it all feels so out of your control. Wishing you the best!!

[Eswyn in reply to Btown98]

Thank you! Hearing positive stories of things working out is just what I need right now in this crazy TWW. Sending lots of love to you and your wild 2yr old xx

[MyLittlePinkness]

Not meaning to be a downer…but 5….I didn’t expect to have to do that many….but I got my precious baby girl in the end!!

[Eswyn in reply to MyLittlePinkness]

Not a downer at all 🙂. It’s helpful to get a range or perspectives so I’ve got an accurate picture. I naively expected it to work first time. I think I need to start preparing myself for the fact that it might not be the case for us.

[Meliana in reply to MyLittlePinkness]

Do you mind if I ask what you think made a difference with your fifth FET being successful? I've had 1 chemical pregnancy and three negatives with embryos from donor eggs. I think it's the end of the road for me because I only have one more 6 day 3BA embryo left with a 50% chance of success but looking for some hope. I can't afford any more IVF (not covered at all by insurance) and the last transfer was my best 5 day 3AA embryo

[Ace1991]

remember it’s not just about the eggs. It’s about your lining and the actual transfer itself. So easy to just blame eggs. I was in your exact position. We have 5 DE Frosties. 1st one failed but i believe timing was wrong. We waited for lining to get thicker and probably missed the window. Next frosty we went earlier and rather than waiting for optimum thickness and it worked. I think my clinic quoted 70pc chance of success so odds in your favour for sure !!!

[Eswyn in reply to Ace1991]

I think we’re with the same clinic! They’ve been a bit more cautious with us and said it’s a 50:50 chance with a Day 5 embryo. Out of interest did you opt for the medicated or natural modified cycle? I did natural modified and had to have a few scans before we were ready to go. Despite my lining and follicle size being optimal, I still wasn’t showing any signs that ovulation was imminent, so we made the decision to crack on and not wait any longer. Love the fact that it was gentler on my body, just hope it was enough 🤞🤞

[Ace1991 in reply to Eswyn]

Hiyah. I used London egg bank and London women’s clinic. We had the full meds. I’ve had lots of IVF and never struggled with the drugs to be fair. Definitely noticed a poorer response from womb lining now in 40s. ( previous 6 rounds I was in my middle 30s ). I ended up using patches to help. Otherwise all good. Baby now 1 years old and best additional to the family ! ( already have two from previous IVF )

Just know. You will get there. I always knew this. It’s just the journey isn’t always easy.

👌wishing you lots of luck with this one and I’m sure you’ll be here soon holding your baby and helping others

[Hidden]

I had 3 transfers in total. The first two had problems with the cycle (progesterone allergies and family crises). The third we did a double and now have 18 month old twins. Just like with any pregnancy, everything has to align, but certainly younger eggs should help. My donor was actually 30 at the time of donation so maybe that’s why it took longer! 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s so hard! The TWW is the worst.

Wishing you all the sticky luck.

Xx

[Eswyn in reply to Hidden]

Congratulations 💕 (You can still say that when they’re 18months right?!) I know three cycles is really nothing when you’ve waited so long already, but at the same time it can feel like a lifetime.

Need all the luck I can get, so thank you for sending some my way xx

[Debsdex11]

Hi Eswyn, I used DE, my clinic didn’t even grade the embryos because they didn’t feel it’s helpful, lower grades are often as successful as higher. And also wouldn’t test them as the donor was 26 and they felt there’s no point at that age, same as yours said. I got success on 2nd transfer, now 20 weeks pregnant, fingers crossed for you that this is your time xx

[Eswyn in reply to Debsdex11]

Very reassuring to hear that yours were untested, and not even graded. I think it’s the grading that panicked me because I was hoping for more, even though I know it’s subjective and doesn’t really matter. Our donor was 27, which is 12 years younger than me. Really hoping it makes the difference ☘️

[Yellowlove]

Mine took 3 attempts, all were 4BBs, currently 9 weeks. All were untested. I totally agree, you expect first time results when you move to DE, but there is so much more at play than the eggs. The positive take away from all these comments is that it’s worked! Wishing you all the success my lovely xx

[Eswyn in reply to Yellowlove]

You’re complete right! I’m clinging onto the fact that it’s worked out for so many. It may not be a magic wand that miraculously fixes everything, but there’s every chance it’ll work for us 🤞

[Yellowlove in reply to Eswyn]

Yes I totally went it with the attitude it was going to work because statistically speaking chances are higher. Such a journey for us. Xx

[M_fox]

mine took one attempt, amazingly. Embryo was 5AA but untested as we thought it was additional time and risk (I was 47 at the time of transfer) We had never been successful before, not even a positive after 15 yrs of trying. Wishing you all the luck xxx