Any support would be appreciated.

[Tap1987]

Does anyone have stories about being refused IVF for being obese on their BMI? I am at 31 and have been told to lose weight. I have put 4 stone on since an increase of Sertraline to 200mg a day following issues with mental health in 2019. This along with a delay in the process during the pandemic, I was told in April 2022 that I would need to lose weight before I could have treatment. I was diagnosed with PCOS during this process. I was left with a letter that stated I needed to lose weight. I have a history of disordered eating which I have not informed A doctor about and instead revived private counselling. This has triggered the disorder eating and I found a nutritionalist to support me. I have failed to lose the weight and again Themis has triggered disordered eating this year. I have been told to phone the doctor when I am at the right weight. I have been eating healthy with no disordered eating for six weeks and going to a gym. I have not lost weight but know I need to take time with this. I feel like a failure and that if I really wanted a baby I could do this. I find it so difficult and it is like all of my issues around weight are being confirmed as they are saying I can’t have a baby until I am thinner.

[JustJane1234]

I don't have direct experience but just wanted to say it's amazing that you've been able to keep up the healthier eating and exercise for 6 weeks. That's such an achievement and the weight will start to come off soon. Please remember that managing weight is NOT a level playing field: for so many reasons, it's just much harder for some women. It doesn't make you a failure or any less deserving of being a mum. Wishing you lots of luck xx

[Tap1987 in reply to JustJane1234]

thank you so much x

[Kittykat198]

I’m so sorry and there are loads of us who were refused treatment based on bmi. I was refused clomid for my weight but didn’t for Ivf because I was too old for funding in my area. My clinic accepts Ivf for bmi of under 35 for private patients so I had to pay.

I have pcos too and completely understand how difficult it is to lose weight. I managed it slowly and with a lot of persistence. It is completely disheartening losing 1 pound in the time it takes to lose half a stone. It is pretty great to have stuck at it for 6 weeks!! It will eventually shift. Our bodies just are very keen on keeping our stores!

I was advised to try insitol by my clinic which can help some people and I thoroughly recommend getting your thyroid checked too because my tsh was too high and the medication really helped me to start losing weight even with the pcos.

[Tap1987 in reply to Kittykat198]

thank you this is great advice. X

[Kittykat198 in reply to Tap1987]

it’s totally not you though. Lots of women who have high bmis get pregnant and have healthy babies ever day. It’s incredibly frustrating. You can do it. X

[Boo718]

I totally get you I had to lose over 5 stone to start my ivf journey and I just couldn’t get the last bit off. So we ended up going abroad as they wouldn’t take me xxx

[ADHDPCOS]

In the same situation here Tap. It sucks xx