Transfer day given up hope already

[Missl73]

Feeling really sad and need a pick me up after todays transfer. We only got a 4CA (all my previous transfers were 5AA and my son was a 5AB) so I’m convinced there’s no chance this is going to work. I really didn’t want to go through another fresh egg collection but it feels inevitable now. I’m going to transfer the 4CC I have in the freezer (if it survives the thaw) next month and then move clinics to do a new fresh cycle in May. I wonder if my protocol change affected my egg quality because our last fresh we got a much higher blastocyst rate and the quality was also much better.

[KiboXX]

Hey lovely,

I’m sorry you’re feeling so down but just wanted to say that if it’s good enough to freeze and survive the thaw, then it’s good enough to make a baby! My clinic don’t tell you the embryo grades for this reason. Plenty of top grade embryos fail and plenty of lower grades make babies so don’t give up hope just yet xxx

[Ranchu90]

Oh don't be sad at all one of my twins was a 5BC and the other a 5BB. If the embryo is euploid you have all the chances, grades are just subjective numbers and letters. Indeed protocols are also helping improving the egg quality in my opinion (according to my experience). Stay positive 🤩❤️

[Missl73 in reply to Ranchu90]

This is amazing! They did spring on me did I want to put back 2 given the quality so the clinic obviously doesn’t hold out much hope either but I already have a son from IVF and no way could I handle twins now. Hats off to you mama I think twin mamas are superheroes! Xx

[Ranchu90 in reply to Missl73]

Oh thank you! Twins is a damn crazy job 🤣 but we will survive 😁 All mummas are heroes!!

[sun-and-rain]

I have no idea about grades of my eggs, but I've tried blastocyst, 2do (or was it 3do?) and a 4do that was not their best guess for success, so they saved it for the last try. That one stuck and developed to be my beautiful son 🥰🥰🥰 So heads up! When it's time, it's time 🥰

[Missl73 in reply to sun-and-rain]

Thanks for the reminder. I know it’s just how it goes sometimes, I know perfect embryos also can not work I miscarried a 5AA I just felt so disappointed as usually we get more blastocysts and better quality ones. I just have to wait and see. Congratulations on your son xx

[McQueeny]

I’m so sorry you’re so down, but please don’t give up yet! I never knew the grades of my embryos when we were trying for my son, they just said ‘good enough’ - and one worked ! I’ve also heard of abnormal embryos making healthy babies, and low grade embryos sticking better than higher grade ones…. It really isn’t a clear science, there are so many factors.

Try and keep optimistic, though I know it’s so hard - and take care of yourself 🤞🍀💪🤗

[Missl73 in reply to McQueeny]

I do think it would be better not to know seeing as it was all we got we were always going to try it and see. Sometimes information just gives you something to obsess over than you can’t change or control. It’s why I’ll never do blood betas again (if I get pregnant) they just make me stress but I can’t change the outcome. How are you feeling after last month? Have you got plans to go again? Xx

[McQueeny in reply to Missl73]

Yes I agree… sometimes too many details make it worse. My clinic don’t do betas at all unless there’s a specific concern - I was upset by that sometimes (feels odd to bank on a HPT alone, so I did ask for a blood test on occasion) - but it was one less thing to obsess about, once you get a BFP they just book you in for your viability scan… 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m ok, thanks. I was really low for a bit, but better now. Yes, we’re all set to go for our next fresh round, hopefully in about two weeks if AF arrives as due 🤞🍀 xx

[Shell-c]

Just wanted to let you know I had my last transfer on 17th March. It was embryo number 11 in total and the grade was 4CB so I didn't hold out much hope but it stuck. It's very early days for me, 5 weeks today but I've never been pregnant before. There is always hope 🥰

[Missl73 in reply to Shell-c]

This is amazing congratulations!!! So happy for you xx

[st1984]

My little girl was a CB so don't lose hope yet, they wouldn't transfer if there was no chance. I had loads of higher grades transferred that didn't work or ended in MC so I don't really think much to the grading to be honest. Good luck xx

[Missl73 in reply to st1984]

This is exactly what I needed to hear today. Congratulations on your beautiful daughter xx

[Eternalwarrior]

Hello lovely, according to my fertility consultant, any embryo that it is good enough to freeze and be transferred is good enough to result in pregnancy and a baby! We had 4 'beautiful and perfect' 5 day AA embryos that didn't work. I was utterly devastated and didn't hold onto much hope... but I am currently pregnant with a B grade embryo. My consultant always kept repeating that although the quality of the embryos is important, the baby's house for 9 months and many other factors, like the mother's health, are equally as important. And sometimes they don't know why but it is the last embryos that work. Please don't give up and I pray your little one sticks! xx

[Missl73]

Wanted to share in case someone comes across this thread looking for 4CA stories like I did…. Against all odds and certainly my expectations I got a lovely strong BFP today at 9dp5dt!

[Redsequin in reply to Missl73]

Ahhhh!!! Wonderful news. So happy for you. 💫🥂🎉

[Missl73 in reply to Redsequin]

Thank you!! I had absolutely convinced myself I was out so I’m delighted. Now the much scarier wait to the viability scan. I see yours went well that’s wonderful news xx