Back again!

[Jam-master]

Hey! Been on here for a while but took a break from posting as we’d taken a break from IVF. My short story: did ICSI and gave birth to my beautiful boy in 2018. I’ve had 3 failed FET’s since so that’s why we took a break. Back for another cycle, was suggested we do PGT-A so I’m going in for bloods to get my AMH etc.

Need to try and feel positive this time round but after 3 failures it’s quite hard. Just always find people on here very supportive and helpful so hoping I’ll get that again to get me through this very tough and hopefully exciting time. Thanks for reading xx

[Picalilli99]

Welcome back! We are also back after a break. It is so hard to stay positive when faced with repeated failures. But hopefully a break may have helped. And you are definitely in the right place for support and plenty of others who totally understand. Wishing you the best of luck for your next cycle lovely xx

[Jam-master in reply to Picalilli99]

Thanks! A break definitely helps I think, although like you say, with repeated failures it’s hard to start positive. Is there anything in particular you’re doing to try and stay positive? Xx

[Picalilli99 in reply to Jam-master]

Rather than putting pressure on myself to stay positive, these days I think I’m more committed to self-care. I accept that this whole IVF process is bloody hard work and some days I’m going to feel shit and that’s ok. However, I do also try to do things each day that help me to feel good and make me smile. This involves a range of habits that I have built up over time, like getting outdoors for regular activity/exercise, daily meditation (I found both the headspace & more specific the mindful IVF app work well for me), trying to keep myself occupied and distracted (such as with a box set or reading a book) rather than sitting and thinking too much about every detail of the process and all the “what ifs?”, when I’m jogging I like to do a lap of the park where I just think of things that I feel thankful for that day (helps me to feel happier rather than dwell on the sad stuff), soaking in a hot bath (or more recently I’ve jumped on the Wim Hof bandwagon of cold showers in the morning and have been feeling the benefits!). I’ve also had quite a bit of counselling/therapy over the years (we’ve been TTC for a LONG time now!) which I found really helpful. Basically I’ve tried all sorts! But I think it’s important to recognise that different things work for different people and so it’s just about trying things out to help find what works for you. Reaching out for support on here is also a godsend as there are so many people who really understand & empathise. Take care lovely xxx

[Daffodils140]

Welcome back! We have had three failed FETs this year (most recent BFN was just yesterday) and I know what you mean about positive thinking becoming harder and harder. I think it’s natural after all the disappointments to become more guarded and a little bit cynical/negative but I do try to see each attempt as fresh and unique and perhaps a chance to adjust and improve things where possible. Big hugs xxx