2WW, here we go again

This really is the worst part of it right!? Id happily take all the side effects from the stims again over this.

Sadly, as expected, our 2nd cycle ended with a BFN. My bleeding started around 7/8 days after transfer and only got heavier.

We started cycle 3 straight the way again. I couldnt wait, i almost just wanted it over and done with. This one went a lot better. I had buseralin, 300 menopur, 300 gonal f and dexamethasone daily. A lot, but it was our best cycle yet. Ended with 1 grade A, 1 grade B and 1 grade C. I had the A transfered and B and C in the freezer.

However i now feel like its history repeating itself. Im 8 days since transfer, and starting to see light pink blood when wiping. This is EXACTLY how it started before, and the same amount of days past transfer. I know it could mean anything, but in my heart im probably out and thats it.

Im now wondering, if this does end with BFN, if i even want to try and transfer the frozen embryos. It has completly taken over my life, and im just not me when going through any stage of the treatment, i almost feel like ive lost myself.

My husband and I are very open to adoption, and before starting IVF were just very close to going straight to adoption anyway. As silly as it sounds, the actually carrying/ giving birth to a baby doesnt bother me, im not longing for that experience. I just want a family. Why put myself through more stress and upset when i dont need to.

Sorry for the long message, i just needed to get out how i feel somewhere. Has anyone ever had frozen embryos and decided not to transfer them??

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi graccceeee. Just wantedd to wish you well. If it doesn't work this time, you will need to use your frozen embryos before embarking on the adoption route. You have to have given up all fertility treatment before hand. Thinking of you. Diane

[Hidden in reply to DianeArnold]

Hi Diane, thanks for your reply! Do you know if there is an option to ask the clinic to discard the frozen embryos so that they are no longer there frozen and would not have any option to go back to them?

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK in reply to Hidden]

Hi. Yes, speak to your practice manager and explain what you want to do. Remember that they belong to both of you, so both of you need to give permission to dispose of them. Diane

[FrancyItaly]

Wishing you all the best on your 2ww and with a successful outcome! ☺️✨

[Hidden in reply to FrancyItaly]

Thank you xxx

[Future1000]

My 3rd cycle just failed and i have 2 frozen embryos, but my heart aches everytime i think about going through another round, more meds and injections. But we have to do what we have to do. If you have 2 embryos left just give it one more try, you never know 🤞 Yes i agree we are going through a lot physically, mentally and socially. I am not who i was a year ago, i stopped all my career plans because im not able to focus on anything else but ivf and making a family. Sometimes you wish you didnt go through all this. I wish you all the best with your future plans and lots of positive vibes your way 🍀 you are not alone

[Hidden in reply to Future1000]

Thank you xxx

[MissSaoPaulo]

You're around the halfway point and that always seems to be when despair sets in so don't go making any decisions now. I can totally understand just wanting to be done with it - I feel the same way myself to be honest. I'm at the end of my last ever 2ww and I won't say I don't care which way it goes, but even if it's negative it will be a relief not to have to do this anymore - the waiting and the emotional strain rather than the physical side, really. So many decisions, big and small, seem to be on hold waiting to see if I'm going to be pregnant and I just want to know one way or the other and then start getting on with life again (we're lucky enough to have a little girl from IVF and have been using our frosties trying for a sibling, so I understand it's not really the same situation)Spotting isn't necessarily a bad sign, so it could still go either way here. Wishing you all the best and you'll make the right decision when the time comes - but that time's not now in the throes of 2ww despair!! xxx

[Hidden in reply to MissSaoPaulo]

Thank you! And fingers crossed for you result 🤞 xxx

[MissSaoPaulo in reply to Hidden]

Ironically, it was 'inconclusive' and have to do another blood test tomorrow. More waiting!! I think it's probably a chemical. Good luck with yours xxx

[hodgeheg2]

Sending lots of hugs to you. Am just starting our second 2ww (after taking time out for fibroid surgery) . Personally, I think if it's taking too much out of you then you know the answer, you'll be a fab parent however you get there.

[Hidden in reply to hodgeheg2]

Thank you so much. And everything crossed for you! Xx

[road_to_motherhood]

Hi,I’ve just come across your post and just wondered how you had got on?

We’re in the same boat currently but have just had our third negative from ICSI. We have one embryo left in the freezer and technichally another round paid for (we paid for a multicycle package) but we’re really not sure we can go through with it any longer so thinking about adoption (although we know we have to wait 6 months to start the process).

How did you get on? Did you end up using the embryo you had in the freezer? Or how did it work if you went down the adoption route? Sorry I hope I don’t sound or come across as insensitive, it’s just I have never come across someone in the same boat as me x