Trigger warning Missed miscarriage

[ShelleyBalders]

Trigger warning this post is about missed miscarriage.

Very sadly after 2 years of trying to conceive our second child my second pregnancy is a missed miscarriage. The hospital have recommended I either have medical management at home or in hospital or have the D and C. I really don’t know what to do. I’ve heard some people say the medical management is a lot of pain and doesn’t always work and you end up with a D and C anyway although could also be ok. But with D and C they couldn’t fit me in till next week and surgery feels invasive. Has anyone else had to face this choice how did you decide? What was the least worst?

[ShelleyBalders]

My gestational sack is 9 weeks but there is no embryo. They’ve called it a blighted ovum and the pregnancy stopped growing at about 6 weeks.

[SMMW in reply to ShelleyBalders]

This is exactly what I’ve been told .. having a procedure tomorrow to remove 😢

[fay2399]

Is invasive procedure and there’s risk of uterus being scratched... medical treatment was very very painful you may have 2 hours in hell ... it worked for me anyway D and c is more dangerous when you do it for second time..

Hope it goes well for you! If u are not in rush for ivf or pregnancy you can wait for natural miscarriage too !

All the best xx

[ShelleyBalders in reply to fay2399]

Thank you. I don’t want to wait for a miscarriage naturally as my pregnancy symptoms are so strong. Awful morning sickness all day and uterus still growing. It will take some time before my body realises whats happened I think. I just want it all to be over so I can move on. X

[fay2399 in reply to ShelleyBalders]

Is your hcg keep going up? I hope u don’t have the issue like me.. I had molar pregnancy... check your hcg urgent and do ultrasound to make sure you are ok ..Best of luck xx

Don’t panic but is better to be safe xxx

[ShelleyBalders in reply to fay2399]

Hello yes this is all ok thank you. I’m sorry for your loss too x

[Runcaptain]

I recently had a missed miscarriage at 9 weeks, we knew from scans at 7 & 8 weeks that this was the increasingly likely outcome so we didn’t have the same shock that you’ll be experiencing. I opted for medicated assistance. The pain was intense for an hour or so but for me I think I was lucky as I’d anticipated it’d be much worse.I wanted to be at home and collected my baby remains so we buried them in the garden. I was frightened but I am so glad I went with my choice.

I certainly understand why d&c can be more favourable as it’s then ‘done’ and you don’t experience the same pain. Whatever you decide, I’m sorry for your loss x

[ShelleyBalders in reply to Runcaptain]

Thank you for sharing and your understanding. I’m feeling frightened too but like you want to be at home around all my safety. I’m sorry for your loss too x

[RubyVet]

So sorry you are going through this. I had a D&C in March at 10 weeks so around the same as you. This was my only miscarriage so I don’t have anything to compare it to however I opted for it as I didn’t want to go through the trauma of bleeding and pain. The hospital gave me a lot of information about the pro and cons. It was draining and I needed to rest afterwards. But I would opt for that again.

Xxx

[ShelleyBalders in reply to RubyVet]

Thank you for sharing your experience. I’m sorry for your loss too. It’s an awful choice to have to make. I’m thinking that I will ring the hospital this morning and have the bloods for management at home and if they are ok I’ll probably go ahead with that and if not I’ll wait for the D and C x

[Icsi_Wincy_Spider]

Hi ShelleyBalders , I am so sorry to read this. The same happened to me end of April 💔 I had d&c as I was scared to see pieces of the fetus (would break my heart even more), and also I wanted to start more ivf rounds so figured it would be quicker. They can also test the fetus if you do d&c, my results came back this morning actually - something about chromosome 13 (can't remember if she said it was missing or extra).

The only thing was the cost: my d&c was £750.

£750 for a procedure I never wanted to have 💔

It's such a personal choice and you need to do what's right for you. My next period came 5 weeks after d&c, our bodies are pretty amazing really. Xxx 😘😘

[Zebedee1971]

Depends how far along you were? For me, I always miscarried fully within a couple of weeks- no intervention needed. My body just seemed to be quite good at recovering from these things and 'clearing the slate' so to speak. But minee were always under 8 weeks.

[Hidden]

I have had a number of miscarriages, including exactly the same as you a Blighted Ovum around the same time. I opted for a D&C for that pregnancy and following MMC because for me I needed to get it over and done with and my body hadn't realised for so long it didnt feel like it would realise any time soon. I wanted it to be quick, unmemorable and then allow myself to deal with the grief

Having said that I have also had natural MC at 6 weeks (not Medical management) and it was just like a heavy period.

Just to be clear on another comment - there is no foetus in a blighted ovum so there is nothing to test so this isnt an option.

I don't think there is a right or wrong option, but I am sorry for your loss and whatever you choose I hope you find some positivity over time x

[Hidden]

I’ve had a 3 mmc too 2 blighted mc both at 12w and 1 grew to 9w but heart stopped mc at 12w.

I had 1st naturally was painful like early labour contractions.

2nd started naturally but baby (at 9w size) stuck in my cervix they had to pull it out with forceps they then tried medical management but nothing happened I had past all the tissue so it was fine.

Last I had a Mva it’s like a d&c but you’re awake I’d opt for this again although not very pleasant it was quicker hardly any pain & minimum bleeding afterwards I would ask if this procedure is available. I’m sorry for your loss mc is an emotional experience aswel so I hope you have support x take care