First failed FET (5d/blastocyst), looking for a pick me up

[singleswimmer]

Hi everyone, I've had my first failed FET (d14p5dt tomorrow but BFNs all the way) and would like to hear others' IVF success stories after failed transfers. I had my first IVF in September and the fresh transfer (d3) failed, 3 blasts frozen. I have 2 left but am feeling a bit nervous, partly because everytime I have to travel from the UK to Denmark and it's been a nightmare in the pandemic! Wondering if there's anything I need to do differently for the second FET.. any thoughts or +ve implantation stories, pls post!

[MelissaS6]

Hi I’m sorry to hear about your bfn. All my pre IVF assisted cycle attempts ended in failure and so did my first frozen embryo transfer. I just had my second fet on May 3rd and so far have a BFP! Although I don’t feel that out of the woods yet. I guess those feelings are just residual from four years of trying. I would say the main difference for me on the successful transfer is that I took 5 days off from work and really tried to take it easy and relax. My first fet, I went back to work right away and felt like my heart was pounding outside of my chest all week. I also went for a run a few days later which probably didn’t cause the failure but I second guessed myself afterwards. I do feel like personally the rest and relaxation made a difference, if not in the transfer, but in my mental state during the tww. You are lucky you have two frosties left. Hang in there - from what I have read having three transfers really increases your odds of success!

[singleswimmer in reply to MelissaS6]

Thanks so much MelissaS6 that was exactly what I needed to read! And big congratulations on your BFP!! That's v exciting - I'm so happy for you. I've been thinking about stress too - while I'm skeptical of how much it might impact a transfer, it DEF impacts the way I've felt about it (not to mention during it) and the second guessing aspect is Hell. I have a high-stress job (shift work ergh) and it was an extra pain having to self-isolate at both sides of this past trip / do all the covid tests etc. I think it's going to be loads easier next time on a practical level, and I will take your advice and clear 5 days afterwards, incl no travel :))

[MelissaS6 in reply to singleswimmer]

Oh thank you! I have a high energy stressful job too so I can definitely understand. You still have a lot of chances and I am rooting for you!

[Fizzbip]

I am right here with you - first fresh transfer failed and 3 embryos frozen, then first FET failed, now I'm prepping for my 2nd FET. I cannot do another egg retrieval and blast #4 is very poor quality so I am feeling quite low! Your post made me feel less alone 🙂 .

[singleswimmer in reply to Fizzbip]

Ugh it’s so much pressure isn’t it 😖. Have you started the second FET yet? I like the number 3 and they do say it’s charmed I’ve decided to take a month off as not feeling physically or mentally great, need to get back on exercise wagon somehow.

[Fizzbip in reply to singleswimmer]

Yes so much pressure! I did start right away (last time I waited in between) - I was kind of regretting it because it felt a bit rushed, but when I went in to have my lining checked I needed some extra time on estrogen before starting the progesterone, so I feel better about it now. Best of luck to you .

[singleswimmer in reply to Fizzbip]

You too!! Keep me posted on how it goes (if you feel like it), am excited for you.

[singleswimmer]

it’s so anxiety provoking isn’t it?! 🤯. Can I ask, why can’t you do another fresh round? When is your transfer?

[McQueeny]

So sorry you’re going through this journey, it’s so tough. Our first IVF we did a freeze all, got 2 blastos, did 2 FETs and both failed. Our second IVF we again got 2 blastos and our fresh transfer worked! We now have a gorgeous little boy, 21 months old.... (trying for a sibling). It’s so so tough but you just need to persevere, sending strength 🙏🤞 x