Yesterday was an awful day and don’t know how to take this news.
I found out my medicated FET cycle had to be cancelled due to non trilaminar lining, which I accept is fine, and was going to go ahead with a natural FET next.
I then found out that through the Dr, now that he is leaving maybe decided to be frank with me in phone conversation, that my lining wasn’t trilaminar and was unsuitable at the last transfer I had in December.
He said the scan was done by someone new and inexperienced, and wasn’t checked as they didn’t realise she needed to be supervised at the time.
But looking at the scan images now he can see that the lining wasn’t right. That transfer was with our top grade embryo and ended in a chemical.
I’m feel so devastated and completely numb with that news. I have been told only 1 of my embryos out of 4 will statistically be normal, so what if that was the one I’ve lost. We have 3 embryos of lower grade left I’m so disheartened that they won’t work because I’ve lost my normal one, and don’t know how to stay positive.
I feel so angry at the clinic for their oversight but I don’t have the mental space for anger right now as I’m too sad.
I haven’t spoken to the clinical director yet about what the Dr told me. I’m really confused about what to say I can’t think straight. We are now thinking to move our embryos elsewhere as I don’t think I can trust anyone there again.
I guess I’m just looking for any words of advice or encouragement.
Xx
Written by
Maui2020
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Oh gosh I can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling!!! Thats truly awful, and heart breaking. We put all our trust in our clinical team, but they are human and mistakes can be made- but these are lives that are impacted!
I would ask the Clinical Director for a full report into what happened....
Thank you. The situation has fuelled all my little anxieties. I think your advice is a good start. I’m still so hormonal so I’m hoping when the progynova wears off I’ll feel better x
I would sue them and move clinic....
I know someone who sued their clinic for mistakes like this and they won the case and got huge compensation x
The Dr told me not to overthink it, as the embryo may not have worked anyway. He said if it was PGT-a tested there would be bigger questions. I was in shock at the conversation, it made me speechless at the time. I wonder if with those replies I would still have a case to sue? X
Omg you poor thing, what horrendous news to be told. I would also request a full report and look into making a claim - it is insane that this happened to you at a fertility clinic (where this should be standard!) and I’m so sorry.
I would also definitely move clinic as it will relieve the anxiety you feel.
Even if your other embryos are not as good as the one that was transferred, don’t lose hope - there are so many ladies on here who have had lesser quality embryos transferred that have resulted in a baby
Thank you. That’s really all I need to keep telling myself, that I’m not going mad for being so upset at the situation. And there is still hope. I get so fixated on the stats, but I have to remember all the situations that go against the odds, exactly like yourself. It keeps me going. I hope You’re doing well.. lots of love to you and your little bean xx
Oh hun I’m so sorry to hear this. Looks like this cycle was doomed for us both. That’s so awful too about your previous FET. I would be livid - but I also hate feeling angry at people as I know they are only human. I do think they have a duty of care though and I would think about talking to your doctor about compensation. It won’t change the outcome but it could help financially xx
Hi Millbanks, I read your post and sympathised so much! The waiting can be agony. Looks like we may still be in sync with our next cycles! Right now I don’t want my anger to take over as it’s counterproductive, but I do want to pursue the error in time, out of principle and yes it would help a lot financially if because of This we need another cycle. I know I won’t care if my remaining embryos work so I’m concentrating on getting them out of there first.
I guess we just have to focus on the positive. Just know that we are doing everything in our power to move forward and we can’t do more than that.
I really hope the wait goes quickly for you. I was listening to Mindful IvF meditations and it did resonate that time moves as fast as we perceive it to. At least our embryos are frozen in time right now xxx
I will likely have a bleed in the next few days. In an ideal world I could have started my cycle again next week. But I can’t bring myself to stay at this clinic. The Dr also revealed that they don’t do natural cycles because they often have scheduling issues. So i can’t go through any more with them. It means a delay of moving embryos but I’m ambitiously hoping I can do it for the cycle after the next. It’s not just all the money they have cost me, it’s also time I feel more hurt about. But trying to soldier on.
I think that is completely fair enough - I've thought about moving clinics for far smaller issues! I think moving embryos is pretty straightforward and can be done quickly so there's no real reason that you can't go straight in to another transfer. The time is the worst or rather the loss of time. I really hope you can get moving quickly.Everything crossed for us both xx
i’m also thinking to move my embryo to other clinics. therefore i really keen find any advice as i’m abit fed up also with my current clinics that she said( nurse) if i start will used same protocol and no further investigation or do something to improve the chances get pregnant.
Hi Qido, I was really worried about the thought of moving embryos. But found it doesn’t seem a difficult process. Need to fill a form and book a courier, which the receiving clinic can advise you on. I’m anticipating the cost is only that of the courier, they estimated £300, and a storage fee by the clinic.
Now from my experience, I would say just do what makes you feel comfortable and act on it if you think things aren’t right xx
totally like spider trapped... that we become milk cow for ivf clinic business... and get trapped option either wasted money and embryo on current clinic or wasted more money to move new clinic...
especially this pandemic... that’s everything need to budgeting and manage well to survive 😭
I completely agree, there is a sting of cost at every step and it’s not a choice as you need to pay up to move on. I think we’ve already paid storage fees at old clinic so will be repaying at new clinic. Painful 😣
That’s just awful so sorry to hear this. As others have said we have to trust our doctors completely and this seems so unfair, really feel for you and hope you get some good advice for next steps. I have seen plenty of people get BFPs from lower grade embryos though so defo don’t lose hope yet xx
I’m so sorry, this is truly shocking and yes, definitely ask the CD for a full report and take it from there. At the very least you should get all of your money back for the costs incurred for the first transfer and any costs for the cancelled transfer.
As for the quality of the embryos, we fell pregnant with my daughter from our 4th embryo. The first 3 were the best and by the 4th we were really scraping the barrel.
We have since done a new round for baby number 2 and have done PGS testing. The embryos that have come back ‘normal’ are all of varying quality but none are great. So even proven normal ones are crap quality.
I wish you all the best for when you decide to go again. It’s such an anxious journey, be kind to yourself x x x x
Thank you Elle. That’s really reassuring information. I almost want to forget that was the best graded. We didn’t do PGS and in a weird way I almost feel that’s now a blessing as we could have prioritised our only normal. This whole process really messes with your head. I appreciate your response xx
Oh dear I’m so sorry you’re going through this! I just wanted to say that having a trilaminar lining isn’t a necessary to have a transfer, a trilaminar lining CAN BE an optimal situation ma it’s not necessary to have a transfer. I really don’t know why your clinic has cancelled your transfer and by what you’re saying they don’t seem very professional (or reliable) to me! If you ask ladies here I bet very few had a trilaminar lining on their transfer, I for one never had one and got pregnant twice....
Hey Toughcookie, you don’t understand how much better that makes me feel, knowing you had success. The Dr had been so adamant about it on this cycle but never mentioned inconsistency of last cycle until he is now leaving. I can’t help thinking I’m also caught up in some internal politics. I’m just glad I know enough to move to somewhere more professional. You’ve really helped xx
Oh I’m really glad if I helped hun! We as patients sometimes don’t realise what’s really going on around us re internal politics and I’m sure you’ll be successful soon in another clinic ❤️Stay strong! Xxx
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
Devastated after failed cycle 
Devastated! No eggs fertilised!!
Devastated 8 week scan
Silent Miscarriage, utter devastation. 
3rd round IVF failed - devastated :(
