8 weeks and feeling anxious

[almostfamous]

Hi, I'm not 8 weeks pregnant following our second round of IVF. We had our 7 week scan last week and everything looked fine and we saw the heartbeat. I've had very few symptoms, sore breasts at night for a few nights but that's now stopped and some mild cramps/twinges which I know can be as a result of the embryo growing/uterus stretching etc. However, in our first round of IVF I got a BFP but when we went for the 7 week scan it showed the embryo hadn't developed and I then miscarried about 5 days later. Prior to the scan I didn't have any bleeding or major cramps so it came as such a shock.

I'm now so worried that the same thing will happen this time and when we go for our 12 week scan it'll be bad news. The lack of symptoms is a real worry for me. I know nobody here can tell me that it'll all be ok but has anyone else had a similar experience? Did anyone go for a private scan prior to their 12 week for reassurance, would you recommend that or did you regret it for any reason? Or any practical tips on how to manage these feelings of anxiety? It's a long time until our 12 week scan and I'm driving myself mad symptom spotting and fearing the worst! Thank you

[Cinderella5]

Its awful when you have had bad news previously and nothing takes that anxiety away unfortunately. We had a scan at 7wks and I had virually no symptoms (twin pregnancy) which didn't help. We waited until we got a date for the 12wk scan then booked in a private reassurance scan exactly in the middle. It was awful leading up to each scan but the reassurance at the time was money well spent and definitely didn't regret it and I figured even if it was bad news then I wanted to know asap. Hugs, do whatever you feel may help you along.....a friend of mind had weekly scans as her anxiety was through the roof.xx

[almostfamous in reply to Cinderella5]

Thank you and congrats! I would have thought a twin pregnancy would mean more symptoms. We don't have a date for our 12 wk scan yet but I think booking a private scan for mid-way is a good idea.

[Cinderella5 in reply to almostfamous]

Thank you! I know you would think eh?! The private scans do help for a little bit, however it doesn't last as I said so enjoy the good days and just get through the bad!!xx

[Naddy1]

Hey hun congrats on the bfp!!!

We had a chemical our first round and currently 15 weeks from our FET so not exactly the same but i also had very minimal symptoms and even up until now don’t feel pregnant so I would try not to worry too much about the lack of them.

I had a scan at 7 weeks with my clinic then a private scan at 10 weeks as my 12 week scan wasnt until 13+4 and I couldn’t wait that long. It defo helped with the anxiety but it does come back.

I feel much better after our 12 scan but will probs have another before our 20 week lol

I don’t have any tips to help the anxiety unfortunately and I know its easier for me to say but try to enjoy your pregnancy as you dont want to look back on it as a bad time in your life

Xx

[almostfamous in reply to Naddy1]

You're right, I don't want to look back on my pregnancy as a time of stress and worry. I know the odds are better once you've seen a heartbeat but it's so hard not to worry after our last experience. Thanks for responding.

[Hidden]

Me 🙋‍♀️ I found out we were having twins just before 8 weeks, all looked fine and I was happy for a couple of days then the anxiety set back in. No real symptoms other than sometimes I'm more tired and I get up a lot through the night for the toilet.Now waiting for a date for the 12 week scan amd im desperate to book one in between but my husband wants us to wait. It's absolute torture but lack of symptoms seems to be pretty common so I'm trying to stay positive but i totally feel your pain xx

[almostfamous in reply to Hidden]

I'm so surprised about people having twins but hardly any symptoms, I would have thought double the baby double the morning sickness haha! I'm over analysing everything, I need to get my thoughts in check. I've googled far too much, but it does seems that no or few symptoms is more common than I realised to. My husband isn't keen on a private scan either, thinks we should wait. I'll try to hold our for now, or at least until we know the exact date for our 12wk scan. Good luck & congrats!

[Hidden in reply to almostfamous]

Tell me about it, all i read is how twins wipe you out and give you severe morning sickness! I've lost count of how many times I've been told to stay off google 🙈. I'm coming up 10 weeks so not far away from you. I dont think lockdown helps with the time passing extremely slowly 🥴

[almostfamous in reply to Hidden]

I agree, time is really dragging when we've not go much to do or anywhere to go. I have been going for acupuncture so that's helped me to feel like I'm doing something positive while we wait for the scan. Good luck for your scan 🙂

[Hidden in reply to almostfamous]

Thank you, you too xx

[87Ballerina]

Hello,

Your situation sounds very similar to mine, I too had a miscarriage which was found at the 7 week scan, I went onto another failed cycle then a successful one which I now have a 3 month old boy. I found that it was only when I got to 20 weeks I started believing it. When I went for the 7 week scan (alone due to covid) I was petrified as was my husband but the nurses were so convinced everything was fine after seeing a heartbeat they said I could

Tell everyone, we didn’t until 12 weeks but I thought it’d share as that’s how confident they are after a 7 week scan. Sending wishes your way xx

[almostfamous in reply to 87Ballerina]

That's such a shame your husband couldn't come in for the scan, we were lucky and my husband was allowed in, don't think I could have done it alone after our previous experience. Wow, that's saying something that the nurses said it's fine to tell people after 7 weeks, that gives me some reassurance. We haven't told anyone in 'real life' yet so finding it hard not being able to ask friends about their experiences or share my worries with them. Thanks for responding and congrats on your baby boy!

[Zebedee1971]

Hey,

We had scans every 2 weeks up until 14 weeks-- it helped a lot.

I know people focus so much on symptoms, but I'd say try to remember that miscarriages usually do involve sharp pains or heavy bleeding... Personally, I only ever got a few pully feelings in my lower stomach, sore nipples and literally 3 days of nausea. I didn't get cravings or anything extreme, mostly I was just tired.

I know it's easy to assume the worst, because if that's all you've experienced then what else can you expect? But I'm currently 17 weeks in (first time ever with a heartbeat and first time past 7 weeks) so it can happen. You can't do anything to control what happens next, but just keep faith that disappointment, sadness, loss... None of these are guaranteed, you're not destined to fail every time, there is no rule to say you can't go on to be successful this one time.

Good luck 🤞

[almostfamous in reply to Zebedee1971]

Thanks, that's wise words. I think the lack of control over the outcome is a factor for me. I'll really try to chill out over the next couple of weeks and see how it goes, if I'm still feeling anxious then I'll look into booking a private scan. Thanks and lots of luck to you!