Not sure what to expect

[Melonay1987]

Hi.

I'm not sure what I expect from this really, but I suppose I just wanted to express my frustration and maybe if any advice can be given, then that would be great.

I'm same sex couple, living in Wales and I am waiting for IVF in England. I've been told its a 12-18 month wait because its welsh policy. Its been over a year and ive heard nothing, I know they said could be 18 months but I struggle to understand how we can be left longer than 12 months as its physically impossible for us to conceive. I would normally call to check the progress etc but unfortunately I had a bit of a bad response from someone I spoke to a little into lockdown. I felt like it as moidering and wasn't really given any reassurance.

I'm sorry if if this long winded and doesnt seem to have a point, but im beginning to become frustrated now

[Cinderella5]

Sorry to hear that the waiting list where you are is so long. It is frustrating knowing that you are just hanging on.....I think we all feel the same when we are waiting to get started and sadly there are are a fair few in the position that have no chance of conceiving on our own.....its shit! Im guessing that as you have phoned previously you know that you are definitely on the waiting list?! The only other thing I was going to suggest is to say that you would accept a last minute cancellation (that is if you can of course). Its no consolation but you are not alone on this forum and its a great place for support, even if it is just to get those frustrations out!xx

[Melonay1987 in reply to Cinderella5]

Thank you so much for you reply. Its rubbish isn't it. I guess I can call them to ask if I can be considered for a cancellation, I always feel I am being a pain in the bum when I call up (I'm sure that's not the case). I'm such a wuss and don't like any sort of confrontation, but think for my own piece of mind I need to call up for some reassurance. Xx

[Cinderella5 in reply to Melonay1987]

If its any consolation I work in the NHS and never would think anyone checking up on a waiting list is a pain in the bum so yes just bite the bullet and just say you are checking that you're on the waiting list and can you put your name down for a cancellation and leave your telephone number. They may not have a cancellation list but "if you don't ask then you don't get". They might even be able to give you more up to date info of how long things are taking.xx

[Melonay1987 in reply to Cinderella5]

Thanks cinderella, thats boosted my confidence im going to give them a call xx

[Cinderella5 in reply to Melonay1987]

Good luck.xx

[Nat246]

Hi sorry to hear you’re still waiting, it’s torture all the waiting! I am also unable to conceive naturally and waited similar time. They don’t consider this is their decisions. It is sad though as whilst you are waiting you read about surprise natural pregnancies but know this will never happen for you. Hoping you hear soon x

[Melonay1987 in reply to Nat246]

Ah sorry to hear you are in a similar situation Nat, its so frustrating. I'm hoping to hear back from them.soon and ill keep you all updated. Good luck with your journey too xx

[BroodySingle]

Don’t have much in the way of advice, but as a single person I understand the frustrations to some extent. There’s no funding for singles my way so it’s the one benefit of paying for my own treatment is that there’s no waiting!

I’m also on a waitlist for DE as it’s unlikely I’ll get anywhere with my current cycle as my numbers are awful.

The waitlist for DE was about 9-12 months when I went on it in April and it’s super hard just waiting around for that call.

But, April to now has flown by in a way and I’m almost in the position on the waitlist to get called to start the process (although I’m looking at another 3 months or so from that point!).

Wishing you lots of luck and a speedy move up the waitlist. xx

[Melonay1987 in reply to BroodySingle]

Ah I'm sorry to hear you've not had any funding, that really sucks. Yeah the wait is tough isnt it, like you say I'm sure it will fly by xx