Going through a missed miscarriage, any advice on what to expect?

This morning I had an ultrasound scan at 12 weeks and the doctor confirmed that I had a missed miscarriage as there was no heart beat and it appears as though this happened at week 7/8, I had light cramping all day and light blood when I went to the Toliet this morning but it's been 8 or so hours since and there hasn't been any more bleeding. I know how hard this must be for anyone who has gone through this but please can you advise what to expect as it appears the baby passed four or so weeks ago and I'm wondering how long it will take for my body to go through the process of miscarriaging? I said today that I would opt for this to happen naturally but at the time I had no other information so was this the right choice to make? If anyone can provide further details I would be very grateful xxx

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  • So sorry to hear this, thinking of you xxx

  • I'm so sorry. I had a similar experience at 12 week scan when we found out our 2nd natural conception had ended in a missed mc at 8 weeks, we also found out we'd lost identical twins. We were taken to the EPU (early oregnancy unit) immediately and treatment options were discussed. I opted for medical management as nothing had happened in the 4 weeks after the babies died to the mc being discovered. The medical management took weeks and 3 overnight stays. Treatment options include natural management (wait and see if mc happens), medical management (drugs to make mc happen) or surgical procedure (under general anaesthetic). Having been through a natural mc and a mc that was medically managed I'd suggest the surgical option but of course it is your choice. Our bodies respond to mc in different ways so it might be different for you. You can always contact the hospital/EPU to discuss your options.

  • Thank your advice I think I need to go back to the clinic and ask more question, at the time I was just in shock and wasn't prepared with the right questions. Sorry to hear your stories it's such a curel process to go through xx

  • hi there. So sorry this has happened to you,I went through very similar in January where I found out at 9wk that baby had died at approx 6wks. The first thing was I had to wait for a 2nd scan to confirm which happened 2wks after the first no hb scan. I had had no bleeding by that time so I assumed it wasn't going to happen naturally very quickly and as I was worried about being out or at work when it happened (my first loss) I opted for the pills they give you. I booked time off thinking it would happen quickly after but 2 weeks later still nothing. They then suggested more pills or the op. As I had had a tonne of time off work at this point I said I would have the op which was booked 5 days later. It was a day surgery appointment but due to them having a rush in surgery I had to wait 12 hrs before getting taken in by which time it started naturally as they give u more of the same pills in prep for the op. I don't want to worry you and everybody is different but it really is a hugely emotional thing to go through, you will not believe how much blood there can be and I found the pain like a labour, they gave me a form of morphine to help but it still came through even that. The process being dragged out just prolonged the agony so if I was to hv to go through it again I would choose the op and just hope the waiting time was less. Am so sorry and I hope the process goes smoothly as possible whatever you choose. If it gives you hope I am now 13wks and scary as it has been everything is fine. I like to think a missed miscarriage is proof that your body is happy to carry and wants to keep any baby even when things have gone so sadly wrong in there, and this will bode well for your future Xxx

  • Firstly I have my fingers and toes crossed that all goes well for you this time and I agree that at least my body was able to carry for 7 weeks so I must be able to try again. Thank you for your honest advise this is very useful, think I'll wait a couple of days as it's almost new year anyway and then discuss my options with the doctors. I naivety thought it would happen today due to early blood this morning be done in a few days similar to a period I should have known better that these things are never straight forward xx

  • Hi I went had managed miscarriage. I was healed within a week. Both options are very emotional & neither is a guarantee (a natural can still need to be medically done & a medical option isn't a guarantee) go with what you believe you can deal with as it's hard enough going through it without doing an option that makes you feel worse xx

  • We were told about our missed miscarriage at 9+5. They said natural is better for your body to recover by itself, but if after a certain amount of time nothing had happened they would review the options.

    I dreaded the thought of it happening when I wasn't expecting it. I decided to see my acupuncturist to see if things could be progressed that way a couple of days later. I had some spotting that day before seeing her, so I knew things were beginning. Less than two days later, the main part of the miscarriage had taken place.

    I was woken up in the middle of the night with the increased cramps/pains/contractions.

    Some advice I was given:

    Make sure someone else is with you in the house, as some people can have funny turns with what is going on.

    Have some painkillers ready.

    Stock up on pads

    I can't really explain it very well, but you will know when you have passed your little one, even if you don't see anything...there is almost a feeling of your body knowing after it has happened.

    My bleeding/spotting went on for a while and I had to go back for a scan to check if anything had remained which could cause infection. I had a little bit of what they thought was blood and after some more spotting, the miscarriage was confirmed as complete at 12+5.

    Only you can truely decide what you can deal with to get through yet another heartbreak.

    The second one with IVF was much earlier being 5+2 so I opted for natural again.

    Having experienced these MC's with IVF, we know that I experienced two more before that too.

    Look after yourself x

  • Thank you for sharing your story its just a heart breaking process, im bleeding a bit more this morning so hopefully I'm on my way I was also seeing an acupuncturist a few months ago so might see if he can do anything to help the situation as well, wishing you all the best for 2017 xxx

  • So sorry to hear this terrible news. My first miscarriage at about 6+5 I waited for it to happen naturally and it took 3 weeks and when it came it was sudden (overnight) and much heavier than a period and it took 12 hours in total to clear in three different episodes- strong painkillers and being near a loo would be what i'd advise for this. The second time at 8ish weeks I opted for surgery as I had awful morning sickness which didn't let up but the surgery was pretty painless, done on the third day , home by early afternoon and then took a few days off as was tender and they insisted (was glad I did emotionally more than anything). This time looks like I'm headed the same way but as I don't have the sickness I will probably wait a week or two to see what happens. You can change your mind at any point. Take care and here's to a happier 2017. X

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