Solo

[Ppops]

Hi all.

Warning - this is a fairly long winded post!

I've been quietly reading all your posts to each other over the last few months whilst shielding!!

Before lockdown started, I decided, after many years of deliberation, to attempt to become a Mum (all I've ever wanted) via IVF (Not what I always wanted!!). Obviously along came our friend Covid-19 and put a halt to everything. This was hard enough but also knowing that members of my immediate family weren't too supportive has been pretty upsetting

Anyhoo, I had my initial consultation in Feb with an amazing clinic (good AMH levels - phew) and they contacted me yesterday to say I could continue with the various scans (and potential HyCoSy - eurgh). YAY

It came so out of the blue but now I feel super anxious. Any wise words would be greatly appreciated,

[Purplis]

IVF journey is a very interesting one. A smooth ride for some and a roller coaster for many. Nevertheless, the joy and hope of being a mum keeps us on.

Good to know you're up for further tests and all. Take it one day/step at a time I'd say and go thro the tests and scans. Hopefully it will be an all clear, then onto the next step. And something else I learnt from this great group, every step forward is a win, so enjoy every moment of the journey while at it.

All the best

[London_Lady1]

Hello hello, welcome to the group. When you titled your post 'Solo' should we assume that your using donor sperm? The reason I ask is that my understanding is that there isn't much point with a HyCoSy unless you

A) want to try naturally for a bit longer (as it will help clear out any debris (yes they use the word debris!!!)

Or

B) your planning on trying IUI

If you're using donor sperm and IVF then your tubes don't really play much of a part in IVF as you skip that whole bit of the cycle.

That being said it's always good to get things checked out and during the HyCoSy they check the whole landscape down there. (So much fun, you'll love it!)

Great news on your AMH means hopefully you should get lots of lovely eggs to play with. Are you getting your other levels checked as well? FSH, Progesterone?

The whole IVF process isn't as bad as you think it will be (from a practical perspective) it's just all the waiting and emotional drain and heartache that you really have to be prepared for. Distraction is your friend in this process!

If you are going it alone I think you're amazing! There are quite a few ladies on here doing so as well and I'm sure they can offer better advice than me on that front. But everyone here is so supportive and knowledgeable that I found it's a great place to be to help you get through the mental side of fertility treatments.

Family are always difficult regardless of the situation. My hubby can't get the support he would really like from his sister because she thinks IVF is wrong for religious reasons (she has 3 kids and is classed as 'first time trier', so she might feel differently if her situation wasn't so fortunate!). So we haven't told any family members we are going through this process. Instead we have a few very close friends who know and having been amazing at supporting us through this.

I'm also sure that if all is successful then your family will be super excited and supportive with the end result of you being a mum regardless of how you got there.

I wish you so much luck with your upcoming journey. Go with the flow and trust the experts.

We are all here for you.

xxx

[Ppops in reply to London_Lady1]

Thank you so much - just had a mini wobble with your end few words. I've got some amazing friends who are totally supportive of what I'm doing (only told a few friends who I knew would support me!)

Yup will be using doner sperm. However I've had quite a lot of surgeries on my abdomen over the years due to a chronic condition I have which has caused scarring on my tubes and have Polyps which need to get checked to. When I went for my initial consultation I was told I'd be there for 45 mins, my appointment lasted nearly 2hrs....thorough or what!

xx

[CLDxxx]

Hey Ppops,

Good on you for making this decision!

I’m also doing this alone and am now 10 weeks pregnant after 3 transfers. It’s not been easy & I have a long way to go but it’s all worth it. I’m sorry some of your family haven’t been supportive but I do hope you have people on your side too?

Plus you have us 🤗

I listened to a great podcast this morning about a woman who also used a sperm donor and think you should give it a listen ☺️ It resonated with me so much. I also read a book called Going Solo by Genevieve Roberts which was great and so informative.

Here’s the link to the podcast should you be interested and I’m here if you need any help.

podcasts.apple.com/gb/podca...

😘 xxx

[Ppops]

I read her book in lockdown which made me even more determined. I'm also doing the Stork and I: Choosing Solo Group Coaching course. Knowing I have you wonderful ladies behind me really helps xx

[IVFat40]

Hello, just wanted to say I'm also doing this thing solo. It's so nice that there are quite a few of us solo flyers on this forum 😊

I'm just waiting on the outcome of my 3rd transfer.

Wishing you all the luck!

[Ppops]

Oooo crossing everything for you! Keep us updated xx

[Gerti2020]

Hi, I’m also doing this solo. It’s not how I planned my life to be, but as I got close to being 40 I realised that I had the rest of my life to find a life partner but not to have children. I have only told a couple of friends and they have been Really supportive (but don’t live close to me). The only time I found it really hard (And lonely) was egg collection where I had no one to take me to the clinic so had to get a taxi. All in all, It’s been ok, if you’re strong enough to make the first steps (as you have done) then you will be able to to this! Wish you and everyone else on this site all the luck in the world 😀