Absolutely gutted :-(: Had our FET and... - Fertility Network UK

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Absolutely gutted :-(

Starsandsunbeams profile image

Had our FET and got a BFP. I'd already posted about some of my worries previously. Unfortunately, they came true. I was booked in for my 7 week scan next Tuesday but had been so anxious over last week, that they said I could go in today at 6 weeks. They couldn't locate anything in my uterus. I re-did a pregnancy test and it came back negative.

We are devastated. And angry and bitter and worried and sad and all other horrid emotions.

Our first fresh transfer failed in March, we only had one frostie which we used and did get this BFP. But now that is all over. I just feel like I hate the universe and that life is so unfair sometimes and have no idea how to deal with this. What am I supposed to do? I cried after the news, then felt numb. Actually went into work for a couple of hours as did not want to sit at home and cry. Yet that's all I can do right now.

This journey is so hard. My heart continues to go out to anyone going through it or who's been on it xxxx

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Starsandsunbeams
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26 Replies
Kitcat12 profile image
Kitcat12

😞 I'm so sorry lovely. It's the saddest, most heartbreaking and unfair thing. It's totally normal for you to feel numb. I was in total shock when my pregnancy test turned negative at 6 weeks. I cried for 3 days straight. You just need to do whatever it takes to get yourselves through the next few weeks of heartache. You'll never forget the pain you're going through but it will get easier to deal with in time. Look after yourselves x

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Kitcat12

Thank you. I just don't know what to think. I don't know whether to go to work tomorrow or take some time off, but will I just spend the day crying and then feel worse about it all? Or if I go to work, at least I can occupy my mind and feel good about at least something I can do, as at the moment, I feel useless with regards to fertility, babies etc xx

Kitcat12 profile image
Kitcat12 in reply to Starsandsunbeams

Only you know what will be best for you lovely. If the distraction of work will help you then go in to work. Whatever you need to do to cope. I'm so sorry you're going through this x

2-shades-of-hope profile image
2-shades-of-hope

I’m so sorry. It is completely heartbreaking to finally get a BFP but then for it to end so sadly. Thinking of you x

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to 2-shades-of-hope

Thank you x

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

I am so sorry you've gone though this! It's so incredibly cruel!💔 Sending massive hugs to you both, look after yourselves!xx

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Cinderella5

Thank you x

Lou7744 profile image
Lou7744

I’m so so sorry to read this. Nothing we can say will make you feel any better. The only thing that helped me process my miscarriages was time. Sending you big hugs 💕 xx

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Lou7744

Time, indeed. Thank you x

Kiedy84 profile image
Kiedy84

I am so terribly sorry, look after yourself and each other in this difficult time😢

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Kiedy84

Thanks x

Noah1981 profile image
Noah1981

This story and all the other heartbreaking reads just make my heart sad and I keep you all in my prayers that your day will come to you all 😢😢 take care sweetheart xxx

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Noah1981

Thank you x

Drives profile image
Drives

💔sending you lots of love x x x

I'm so so sorry to hear this. It feels shit and unfair and you hate the whole world. Take time to work through it. It won't feel like it now but you will get through it. Sending lots of love x x

Muppetgirl profile image
Muppetgirl

Be angry. Be sad. When you feel different I wish you all the luck with your next part of your journey.

Georgya profile image
Georgya

Hi! I am sorry for the bad news! I had my scan last Friday and I new it was game over from a couple of weeks ago when I started bleeding more. It was my first BFP in 3 cycles and we both were devasted. I am so low now I really don't know what to do with my life😞Life is so unfair! Big hugs for you xxx

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Georgya

I'm so sorry to you too. I haven't even bled yet so now just waiting for it. Life is shit at the moment. That's the only word for it! My husband and I are devastated and it is so hard to see how you can move forward right now. Lots of love and strength to you xxx

I’m so very sorry for your loss. It’s just heartbreaking ( been there) I am afraid only time will ease this pain, grief is very individual. Nothing anyone can say to make this feel better but know I am thinking of you during this difficult time & hope you have lots of support around you xxx

Scarlett13 profile image
Scarlett13

I’m so sorry. It’s the worst thing ever. My first BFP last go ended in miscarriage. You’ll find the strength and determination to keep going though - you’ll cry and be numb and be angry but then you’ll be strong and go again. Thinking of you. Big hugs xxx

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Scarlett13

I hope so. Thank you xx

Vegemite profile image
Vegemite

Your allowed to scream, kick, cry and cry some more. The world isn’t fair! It really isn’t.

But I’m going to send some love, warmth and some determination for another go.

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams

Thank you x I have a low AMH of 3.4, but that was November last year. What's PRP? I've heard of PGS.

PurpleLove19 profile image
PurpleLove19

You are so strong to just go work and try to be normal. It’s more than what I would or could do.

I’m so sorry this has happened. X

Maybay profile image
Maybay

So sorry. Could the clinic give you any reason to why they think it happened?

Starsandsunbeams profile image
Starsandsunbeams in reply to Maybay

No, everything went so smoothly, as did the first fresh transfer. Good grade embryos, body responded to meds etc, they said it must have just been something with the embryo that wasn't right x

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