Has anyone given up?

[Olivia80]

Hi, we’ve had 3 unsuccessful IVF rounds and have been trying naturally for 3.5years.

There’s nothing wrong, I just can’t fall pregnant!

I’m going to be 40 next year and don’t want to be a new mum last that (it’s a personal thing and I don’t have a thyroid so already get very tired etc etc etc).

We’re very close to giving up.

We have 2 more Frosties and I just don’t feel like I want to use them, perhaps just keeping them there in case I get this desperate urge.

We’ve never been obsessed about having kids, not really cried at the failed rounds (drug induced craziness yes!) and have a very nice life at the moment. We did the IVF so we don’t look back in a few years and feel we missed an opportunity.

What makes you know that actually, it’s not for you?

[Alpatchino]

It is ok to stop, and it is ok to be tired from all this process. You have been through a lot and it is up to you to know what you have to do to enjoy your life. You have two frozen, which allows you to take some time and figure things out. Good luck! I hope you can find comfort in whatever decision you make!

[hannahkc]

Hi Olivia,

I wish I knew the answer 😊

But thank you for posting this.

I would say be as open and honest with your partner. While it's great that you have the embryos it's up to you whether or not you still feel you want to keep trying.

If you feel stuck counseling could be something to consider.

I found this a useful site and although it's a charity for miscarriage there is material on there that relates to making the decision to continue or not

miscarriageassociation.org.uk

[Hidden]

Gosh I know what you mean, I’ve been fortunate enough to get pregnant but had several MC and only managed through ivf although there is technically nothing wrong with us.

We have a great life too, and I am 42 now.. and really don’t want to be an ancient mum.. my OH is 47 and doesn’t want to be a new dad at 50. I am so torn about trying again, we could carry on our great life with holidays, horses, friends etc. Or we can keep trudging on with ivf. The ONLY thing that makes me keep going is I panic at the thought of not having a family - but even this panic is diminishing over time

I do have one friend who tried everything to get pregnant including 4 rounds ivf, giving up job etc, then gave up ttc and got really stressful job and was pregnant within three months... maybe that’s the answer!?

Wishing you luck and just saying you aren’t alone xx

[alockie]

Have you considered going natural remedies route, such as doing acupuncture or mesotherapy treatment to ovaries? From what I have read procedures might increase chances of getting pregnant x

[Cinderella5]

We were on the verge of giving up just before we got our first ever BFP. More so hubby than me, he was just done with it....sick of the highs and lows, sick of not knowing. We miscarried and I think in some ways the fact that we got pregnant has given us a bit of a second wind and we've decided to do one last cycle of DE, however we have both agreed that if this doesnt work we cant keep putting our lives on hold and financially we have to draw the line....Im 41 now and getting to the point where I dont want to be too old to enjoy being a mum too. Only you can know when you've had enough, I know someone that has walked away recently, very similar to your situation where she has 2 frozen embryos....she just couldnt do it anymore. Best of luck with your decision.xx

[CAS2]

I know what you mean. It's hard work. For most of it you feel (and look) like sh1t and your life as you know it seems to go on hold. It's so consuming. We're on our third round, and have some in the freezer. If these don't work, I think I'm going to give in gracefully, live the life of riley, go on lots of lovely holidays and ensure one my nieces and nephews can one enjoy a lovely inheritance, ha ha! I'll keep reminding them so they come and visit me and invite me round at Christmas when I'm old!

Jokes aside, it's exhausting. And it's ok not to want to do it anymore. I'm sure you'll make the decision that's right for you both xxx