Stressing about trying to not stress = causing stress...

[Faith27]

Anyone else feel like their losing their shit!? 😂😂

Honestly I've had months and months in the past where I haven't stressed or even thought about TTC (genuine!) But as time goes on and on and I'm waiting for a gaeny appointment which cannot come quick enough.. I'm really starting to struggle.

Everyone around me is either pregnant or talking about their children. What's harder I find is that every lady relative in my family has children of their own and hasn't really had a hard time (as far as I'm aware) trying.

I've been telling myself not to ask 'why me' but instead to ask 'why not me?' . This has helped me for quite some time but slowly my patience is wearing thin and I can feel myself beginning to loose my head, optimism and hope.

It's such a bloody lonely experience!

[Midge8]

It is really hard, you’re happy about other people but sometimes it’s just easier to keep these people at arms length. Everyone around me is either pregnant or gave really small children and it just sucks to be honest. Every time someone else announces I feel like it’s someone else leaving us behind. I’ve been stressing about stressing too I don’t think I feel stressed but everyone keeps telling me to not stress! I didn’t realise I was! The whole TTC thing is just an emotional rollercoaster! You’re not alone 😊

[Faith27 in reply to Midge8]

Thanks for your comment hun. You're so right that it feels strange when someone else announces their news and you feel sort of left behind almost! I don't know about you but the fact you (as a lady and human) should be able to conceive makes it harder to comprehend!! There's so many people going through this but unless your on here talking to them and sharing personal stuff.. It's simply unbelievable that this is all happening isn't it! Hope you get some good news soon xx

[88giraffe]

You have just described exactly the way that I feel too so please do not feel alone! I find the most difficult part is the jealousy/ grief that I feel any time someone close to me announces their pregnancy and then I feel guilty for not being able to be over joyed for them.

I am also playing the waiting game for appointments and finding it hard not to stress. This week the coping strategy I’m trying is to allow myself 1 hour in the day when I can obsess over it then try not to think about it for the rest of the day. Easier said than done though!

Keeping my fingers crossed that things start to move more quickly for us both soon ❤️

[Faith27 in reply to 88giraffe]

Thanks for replying hun. It does help to make you feel less alone and I know I don't just speak for myself when I share these honest feelings. It's horrible there are people feeling the same but a comfort to know this too so thanks for your comment. I'm also waiting appointments and must say that this is probably the hardest bit because we still don't know the issue so it's a huge waiting game! Good luck for the future xx

[londonrc]

Hi Faith,

I have found myself stressing again as at the moment I don’t have a full plan in place - we are still waiting for tests and results on my partners side and I just want to get on with it! I have found my stress tends to calm when I have plan and know exactly what is going to happen but with uncertainty hanging over your head it just destabilises us! It’s hard not to wish time away ( as women who find out their pregnant want the first 12 weeks to just come so quickly) so each stage the stress comes back! ( sorry not to stress you even more! )Ha ha. I have found meditation has a good calming effect on me- also not being on my phone on forums / google too much is also good.

I too have been through the ‘ why not me’ and it comes and goes with depending on if I have a positive mindset or not which can vary from week to week!

When is your apt? I hope it comes soon and you can get to move onto the next stage. You aren’t alone in feeling this way. X

[Faith27 in reply to londonrc]

Thank you for replying! We are in similar situations by the sounds - you're right that not having a plan in place makes it an anxious time. Thats certainly the issue with me at the moment. I'm waiting for a fast track gaeny appointment but previously paid for a private gaeny appointment which I thought would help speed up the process and it hasn't as yet. All its seemed to do is make me more worried because that private consultant believes it to be endo and as I'm waiting for this to be looked into, I've got the feeling that all this trying has been in vein! That's my worst fear, that I should have had tests and shouted louder about my past issues and this is what's causing the issues were having now. Thanks for your tip about meditating! I'll give it a go. Have you got some appointments coming up shortly? What's your plan of action xx

[Faith27]

Finally have an appointment next month ladies! Xx