First counselling tomorrow: Ive never... - Fertility Network UK

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First counselling tomorrow


Ive never been for counselling before. How much do I tell them? do they want to know about all my life woes or do I just stick to IVF?

I am super emotional at the moment, work stress combined with family issues, sisters baby, IVF round 2 looming but late period so can't start... and stupid things like pets breaking my heart.

Is it ok to cry? I seem to be crying a lot at the mo.

I literally don't know how much to say and how reserved to be??

Ive just watched 24hrs in A&E. Makes everything so insignificant. My problems aren't life threatening .. am I just being the biggest drama queen and should just give myself a slap?

HELP!!! Thank you! x

12 Replies

Not implications counselling .. its the "free" counselling you get with your paid cycle when it doesn't work...!

Oh my yes therapists love it when you cry!! Let it all out! But seriously just talk about whatever is worrying you, and the therapist will guide you through the sessions, it’s quite hard work to begin with, but I have to say my counsellor has been a life saver for me these past two years, it really does help xxxx

Daisy1245 in reply to Aleelilook

thank you so much, poor woman/man whoever they are - they are about to get it both barrels and will need a LOT of tissues in that case!! Really pleased it helped you.. I am sorry you are having so many difficult decisions to make. I was just reading your last post - ive had loads of hysteroscopies and its always reassuring.. or at least you know what you are dealing with.. I reckon you will feel better knowing whats going on xx

Aleelilook in reply to Daisy1245

Ah thank you, I think I’ll feel like I’m staying on track whilst having a bit of a break to be more me again! How was today? Xx

Hi, I'm sorry things are hard at the moment but you are doing the right thing talking to someone. My advice, be as honest as your can, if he/she doesn't know how you're really feeling they can't help. It's always ok to cry. I've been crying most of the week, either that or shouting at my husband for no reason (tonight's was because he suggested I was having a day off as I'm working from home tomorrow) needles to say he won't say that again.

Take care of yourself, talk to people who know what it's like and give yourself time and care xx

Thanks so much, sorry you are having a tough time too - have everything crossed for your EC.

My OH is constantly dealing with crying or RAGE.. I never used to be like this. So much of me wants to be the old me years ago before I even thought about children.. but so much of me is terrified it won't happen and that person won't be the same person after all of this and life will be so empty. Life is so tricky!

Good luck xx

Hi Daisy, I’m really sorry to hear you’re having such a difficult time. I was nervous and uncertain before I went for counselling for the first time. Try not to worry. Your counsellor will guide you through it all. I had other things going on as well which contributed to how low I was feeling and they did come up during the sessions.

You are not being a drama queen and it’s definitely ok to cry!

Good luck for tomorrow, not that you’ll need it xx

Daisy1245 in reply to Dunla

Thanks so much, your responses are always so good to everyone’s posts. I read what you have been through and mine seems trivial in comparison. Hope you are ok xx

Dunla in reply to Daisy1245

Yes, I’m the best. There is nothing trivial about what you are going through. Like you said about watching 24hrs in A&E, we might tell ourselves we shouldn’t complain as infertility isn’t life threatening as such. However it’s massively life altering and can be very traumatic. Take good care of yourself xx

Share as much as you feel comfortable sharing but I do think in my experience that holding onto unresolved issues has an effect on fertility. It definitely did in my case. This whole infertility journey has such an impact on your mental health on its own never mind with all the other rubbish that life throws at you. Good luck xx

Daisy1245 in reply to Sarahmanc

Thanks so much, I love your story and hope I can have a similar positive outcome as I also have 'unexplained' infertility. I hope your little one is still doing well x

Sarahmanc in reply to Daisy1245

Ah unexplained infertility is so cruel. I almost wished they could find something wrong with either one of us that could just be fixed! But it also does mean that it can happen eventually like it did for me! Yeah he just turned one and we spoiled him rotten. I do think as shit as all of this is, it makes you a more dedicated parent at the end of it. Fingers and toes crossed it happens for you soon xxx

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