How to get through another baby showe... - Fertility Network UK

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How to get through another baby shower 😢


I am just getting ready to go to my husbands cousins baby shower and I am completely full of dread. This will be the 3rd baby shower I have been to this year.

They are extremely large family and they all seem to fall pregnant straight away. Of course I am happy for her but it doesn’t make this any easier for me.

It’s not helped by the fact that the sister in law of the cousin who I am friendly with is pregnant and fell straight away after getting married a few months ago. There will be babies and young children there just adding to my anxiety.

I guess I just need to put my war paint on and get through this. I would really appreciate any tips. I am going with my mother in law so am hoping she will pick up on my anxiety.

When will this all end and be our turn 😢

9 Replies

So sorry you’re having to go through this Katrina. I can see you posted 5 hours ago now so it may be over by now...hope it went ok. You are doing better than me as I just don’t attend baby showers anymore. Xxx

Hope it wasn't as bad as you were dreading well done for even going hope people were kind and not insensitive and especially hope your turn is next x

Get in and out quick would be my advice! These things are boring and drawn from another culture - personally I think babies should be celebrated once they arrive, not before when there is still potential for things to not go to plan. Sorry if that’s negative, just know from awful experiences had by close friends and family. But most relevant to you, is don’t feel quirky about not wanting to go! You always have a choice! Xx

I just don’t attend anymore. It was a decision my husband and I made a few years back. I always feel fine until I get there. It’s the days after... when I get really upset. Hope it goes ok for you x

I know it feels like you have to go and you’re expected to be there but you really really really don’t!! Be selfish. Go out with your husband and do something nice together instead! On this fertility journey you have to make so many sacrifices and put yourself and partner through so much emotional strain, you don’t need to expose yourself to more. No friend or family member that cares about you as a couple would want to put more aniexty on your by forcing you to attend an event. Just send a card and your apologies you can’t make it. Don’t feel bad, don’t feel guilty. This is your life and at this difficult time you’ve got to put your own health (physical and mental) first.

Thank you everyone it was really difficult but I got through it. Hopefully that’s it for a while now xx

I am so with u on this. We will have our turn eventually xx

Hi I have only just seen this. I hope the baby shower went ok.

I haven’t had any recently but after receiving a bfn I would now explain myself and not attend any.

It wasn’t great she is due in a few weeks she didn’t really say much so that was ok. The sister in law was awful she isn’t due to jan and knows a lot about our ivf and three failed cycles and she would not stop going on about her pregnancy and how excited she was and all the things she wanted to do etc which really got to me. But my mother in law was really understanding so I just kinda sat away from anything to much. One of his cousins was really chatting to me about the ivf which I think helped me that at least someone had acknowledged how I may be feeling. Xxx

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