Fertility Network UK
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Boyfriend considering being a sperm donor

Hi all

About to start round 2 of ivf very soon and my boyfriend is considering asking about being a sperm donor. His is the most normal the clinic have seen in years and I know I'm biased but he's a lovely kind man from an amazing family with no health issues - and to top it all off, he's tall, dark and handsome! Has anyone else on here had any experience with sperm donation - either donating or using a sperm donor? I think you have to be an open donor in this country which i believe we are both fine with. Just want to help others going through this all if we can!

8 Replies
oldestnewest

Whao what an amazing man and couple ypi are! How selfless and generous! I have no words of advice but just wanted to say what a lovely thing to do 💕

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Thank you x

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I’ve heard of so many women doing egg sharing but so few men, it’s good to know that altruistic sperm donors are out there! I’m sure your clinic will suggest making use of their counselling service before you go ahead with this, which will help you be sure this is the right route for you x

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That’s a lovely thing to do if it’s right for both of you. We were going to do it, as we were self funded and some clinics offer you your own ivf free of charge if you donate, but we missed the age cut off by just a couple of months. They will offer counselling I think, my one thing I had to get over was if our own ivf didn’t work, his sperm would have been used to create up to 10 families (some families would have more than one children so would be more than 10 actual babies) so that’s a fair bit to get your head around, and if that’s ok with both of you then it’s a lovely thing to do. Xx

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I'm too old to donate but didn't think there was an age cap for men? I'll have to ask.... and yes I have considered how I'd feel if it doesn't work for us but his sperm is used for others - still lots to think about but I feel fine with the idea. I met a lesbian couple the other day who had to go to Europe for their sperm as there's a real lack in England now due to having to be an open donor. They inspired me to talk to my boyfriend about it! X

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The cut off is 40 for men so all samples have to be before their 41st birthday I think, we were a little bit too late as you have to give samples on 10 different days and they like around 2 weeks between each one, which was logistically the only reason why we couldn’t quite fit the 10 in before his birthday xx

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My partner is 41! What a shame! I'll double check with the clinic what their age cut off is but maybe it's the same everywhere. Thanks for the info x

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How amazing! Your boyfriend is incredibly generous. Yes you’re right, in the UK egg and sperm donation is identity release. You’ll probably have to go for implications counselling where those things will be discussed xx

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