being sperm donor for 2 women in the ... - Fertility Network UK

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being sperm donor for 2 women in the clinic abroad

juancarloseperes profile image

Hello

My name is Juan, I am a sperm donor in Spain. Recently I have written to the clinic the e mail and asked if it is possible to go there for egg donor ivf but as a sperm donor, I would love to donate my sperm to 2 beautiful women whom I met in this sperm bank, they have chosen me and contacted me. We have been deciding on what to do for some time as I fell like it is my responsibility to not quit those women. They want to know their sperm donor (me) when they will be getting the egg donor treatment, I know that you don’t get to know your oocyte donor in the majority of the clinics so it would be at least better to have one donor to know and trust. They have been told by their doctors that they have to go for egg donor treatment as it is their last chance. Something unforgettably painful and horrifying so I want them to have just some comfort in this life..

So I have sent an email to this clinic and now I am waiting for their response. But I hope that it is possible thought I don’t know.

How do you think, will I have the chance to go to another country as a sperm donor, to a country with less stupid and strict laws.

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juancarloseperes
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17 Replies
tiffany6868 profile image
tiffany6868

Hello, Juan! It is so nice to meet someone who is willing to help others because you are doing an important job! On the behalf of all the women who have been dealing with fertility issues I want to thank you!

PS I think that it is totally possible but if course it depends on what clinic you choose.

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes in reply to tiffany6868

Thank you for supporting me, but it is nothing, really, I have chosen to be sperm donor not only because i am young and healthy but I also need money so you don’t have to say all of those to me, because clearly i don’t deserve it. i feel really sorry for those two women because they do suffer a lot because of their fertility issues, so helping them with getting pregnant is the most that i can do.

i know that most of the clinics differ, but i hope that the one we have chosen will be the one.

thank you again! PS hope that you are okay and nothing bothers you in terms of your health!

tiffany6868 profile image
tiffany6868 in reply to juancarloseperes

thank you for asking, i am looking for the clinic too right now, but there are so many options really this makes me so frustrated, i literally cannot understand which one is better for us.. stupid me

it is the same thing for me, egg donor ivf is the last chance for me to get pregnant. And we also are suffering from law system in our country..

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes in reply to tiffany6868

But there are so many options, I don't see why it is a problem for you, basically you can go anywhere you want! if you don’t know which clinic is the best for you, you can ask people on forums, i think this would be the best way to understand how each clinic works and if there are some problems with it, because people on forums like this won’t lie. that’s how we have found the clinic we may potentially get the tx done in.

or maybe you should figure out what you are looking for in the clinic so it will be much more easier using your own criteria to decide on this question?

Hi! If you are a sperm donor that means that you have done all of the tests and if you want to go for the treatment with both of those women you can easily do it, it just depends on the fertility center as it has been told in the previous comment. As far as I know most of the clinics will accept you in the treatment if you provide them with all of necessary documents. Easy like that.

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes in reply to obsessedwithmygrlz

Yeah, I kind of know that i will have to give the clinic all of the necessary medical information they will need before we start the treatment, but thank you! i suppose that you think that in every clinic it is possible? i mean, i don't know how the things are with not married couples if they can even get into the tx, because we are looking for the country where this kind of thing is not required so basically the clinic of our choice suits us but we kind of do not know maybe we are mistaken.. will wait for their reply!

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes

Can you please be more precise talking about those tests and examinations? Because I don’t know if there is a difference between requirement in Spain and in Ukraine. and if I would have to find some time to undergo those tests in order to be accepted? I know that it is not that easy but I was just hoping that in the fertility center abroad they would have the option to be examined over there.. Isn’t it true?

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes

Hi! You all are too kind to me. I have written to one Ukrainian clinic, the three of us have found it on the internet and it is one of the best options out there, because everyone just keeps praising it. As I have mentioned I have written to this clinic and asked them if it is possible, I don’t know that much about the fertility treatment in Ukraine though so it would be impossible for me to say whether it is possible or not to choose the donor.

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes

So basically I can go there one time give my sperm, they will freeze it (as far as I understand) and that’s it. Everything else is up to the girls? Right?

72cloud9 profile image
72cloud9

I'm not sure if u volunteer as a known donor in Spain if they allow it but certainly if these women did their treatment in the uk they are able to take u as their known sperm donor and also then have access to the egg donor s details when the child is 18.im not sure whether a uk clinic will accept all ur test results from Spain.worth looking in to this if u have no joy there.

Very nice thing that u r doing for these ladies x

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes in reply to 72cloud9

Thanks! We are going to Ukraine though, those girls they are both wanted to pursue the tx abroad so.. they will be going to Ukraine and the clinic said that they accept the tests results but I would rather do them for the second time over there esp if it's not just blood test and spermogramma

thank you for advising that

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes

No, I don’t think so, I will just be the sperm donor for their two egg donor ivf treatment, that doesn’t mean that I gave my consent to using my sperm in other cases. Those two women have chosen me as their sperm donor and I want to help them. I was told that they could go to the clinic at the same time and like sign the contract and after the stimulation theirs and donor’s the embryos will be fertilized with my sperm and then transferred to their uterine. And it can be performed at the same time.

abbeyaz profile image
abbeyaz in reply to juancarloseperes

Okay, good to know. I will have to go with surrogacy if I don't find any solution to my fertility problem but I still hope that we will be able to have our own kids. My dh doesn't want to use donor's sperm but if I tell him about you, will that be rude or ignorant if I show him your posts and maybe we could talk privately not that I want to make you my donor it is just my husband is a huge conservative, he is the head of the family so it has to be his baby and not mine. But I don't want to give up though.

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes

Really? Great then, I will tell this them so the girls will ask their managers if it is possible to see the donor's list.

yes, I am going to Ukraine in couple of days, though I didn't buy tickets yet, we have arranged the appt for next Monday so i will go there on the weekend.

tiffany6868 profile image
tiffany6868

Great news! When are you planning to go there? You said that you wanted to fly to Ukraine in couple of months, not now. And they’ve said that it is okay for you to be the sperm donor for both of them? it is quite hard to understand though.. how will they perform the contracts and all. And so, you don’t need to be married or something? I am sorry it is kind of confusing honestly, I am myself in a search for the place that would accept me for the ivf de treatment, but I know that for lonely women it is okay to use de and ds, but when you are coming together..

juancarloseperes profile image
juancarloseperes in reply to tiffany6868

it is the same, actually. She will just use my sperm, but contract and everything would be on her name and she would be the one sole responsible for all of the installments that are needed to be paid sooner or later. Plus, they will just keep my sperm frozen till the second woman decides to fly to Kiev. Nothing that hard, I don’t quite understand the whole process but the manager girl said that I don’t need to be worried or anything, that they will take care of every single legal issue.

godsbaby profile image
godsbaby

Hola Juan, Thank you I am so happy you are helping these woman. I am too in a dilema. I want to be a mum and want a sperm donor who the child can get to know. I live in the uk and can not have the treatment here. I am scared but will carry on.

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