urgent how not to lose faith - Fertility Network UK

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urgent how not to lose faith

bfrida profile image
20 Replies

Hi, i'm not a professional user here and don't know to write here but i need your advise. the problem is we lost our faith, i had one son and we've been trying for another child but all unsuccessfuly. i've failed 4 cycles of ivfs and wasted money and time. my mind is going crazy

a few days ago a friend of my mom advised us to try ukraine as a option but i'm afraid. i don't really believe people there/ i've heard about poor situation there and noo

truly to say i'm writing here just to know if someone hear something about clinics there or had a good experience. i will be very grateful you'll calm down my sick soul/

thank you

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bfrida profile image
bfrida
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20 Replies

to be quite honest going for a treatment abroad is already a risk and you should make a very thoughtful decision on where to go and what to choose because this is a very sensitive topic you do not want to mess with.

go for it only if you are 100% sure. for now, if you have any doubts google the info and try to research more on the clinic you were advised.

bfrida profile image
bfrida in reply to notactuallybellatrix

i've googled a lot about it but of it's better to hear from real people about conditions and so on. i've been looking the pics of it and that's seem to be very small clinic. how can i be sure that there are working qualified people? a lot of doubts

notactuallybellatrix profile image
notactuallybellatrix in reply to bfrida

what makes you think that way? if you think like that there must be some proof of it, like a steal proof. or there should be something that makes you suspicious.. or you are just worried because it is a foreign clinic?

I myself am undergoing a tx abroad and also were cautious when we first thought about it but later it became clear that our clinic became the best option out there. even if it is in another country, even if we have never visited that country before.

bfrida profile image
bfrida in reply to notactuallybellatrix

i've read a lot and know that there is a war. so obviously i'm afraid of it. i'm not aware where exactly it is but still. if there are so big problems that mean people also rude and aggressive, even don't know what to think about it

the same about that clinic, i'm not sure in people there

notactuallybellatrix profile image
notactuallybellatrix in reply to bfrida

war? what country is that?

bfrida profile image
bfrida in reply to notactuallybellatrix

ukraine, we found there

miri-p profile image
miri-p

Hi there, it sounds a bit like you are being pushed towards something that you don't believe in. I'm sure there are people who have had good experiences in Ukraine; but first of all it needs to be right for you. You need to be comfortable with the clinic, the travelling involved there (the treatment is probably quite a bit cheaper than in the U.K. but you have to pay for flights there and need to be sure it's safe, yes, Ukraine is not an easy country at the moment). Personally I couldn't have had treatment abroad because I have a full time job here and would have been away for too long, I had a few cycles and needed to go for scans and check ups quite often. I think for some people it works but you need to find out if this applies to you, too, or if it was just good for your mums friend. Good luck for your decision x

bfrida profile image
bfrida in reply to miri-p

Thank you for great words. of course there are a lot of people who have already chose Ukraine as a option but I need to be sure that my choice will be right. I've read that they have good prices and conditions for people. Yes, you are right, there is a difficult situation and I really don't know about it and people there. I think there is a stressful atmosphere and that makes me a bit nervous.

Sorry that you don't have enough time for checking up. wish you luck too. probably I need more time to think about it.

bfrida profile image
bfrida

Thank you for great words. I saw your post about this clinic. It seems like there is no worries but i'm a bit afraid. My previous tries made me helpless. I don't want to live and do anything. Only my husband tries to cheer me up, I'm so happy god gives him to me.

I see, your situation almost like mine, can you share your recepie of being so strong? haha

Keep me please updated, I want to know everything about that country. Thank you very much

xxx

bfrida profile image
bfrida

Wow, now you make a bit calm. If there is not dangrous situation why people always talk about it?

Is kiev in the centre of ukraine? oh, yes this is the capital so probably it should be. I didn't google this.

btw, about clinic, that's great their goal is success because I'm so tired with all my fails. my husband doesn't want to listen to me, he's always late from work. I know he loves me but I can't stand such attitude.

what about extra payments? do the have such? because once I was reading the people who are signed the contract should pay for some medicine and other examination, their hotel and food of course. I'm not talking about ukraine, in some other country? so how's there?

bfrida profile image
bfrida

agged with you. being infertile is such a tornado. You don't know what will happen tomorrow and what to expect from people around you. i'm saying that, firstly, my family support me and now they'are against. especially my husband's mom. once I've listened in their conversation . and she told, why do you want to be with her? She couldn't get pregnant. You wasted your time and money on her? Does she understand it? She doesn't care about you and your help?!!

can you imagine my feeelings at that moment? I was like braking in small pieces. The woman who always smile to me and bring pies in my house said that. Can't believe

now, pregnancy is my last hope to save my family.

bfrida profile image
bfrida

I'm afraiding of all this stuff. And worrying about my family. But if you said so, probably I should believe you.

you said you had contract, what this mean? How many payments did you make? Can we pay whole sum in one time? Do we need to have interpreter or they understand English?

Sorry for these questions.

mannamay profile image
mannamay

I get youor concerns, bfrida! it's naturally to hesitate when it comes to infertility treatment, but if it's to be abroad then you need to think twice or even more. We have lots in common, but I had only 2 failed cycles before the successful one.

If you consider to go to Ukraine, well, as far as i know it's safe there now. I was there 3 years ago rafter all the demonstrations, or revolution as they name that movement, finished. Moreover we felt good.

As for treatment, there are few great clinics. there is a good resource where you can find clinics in different countries and compare them (eggdonationfriends). It may be very useful as it was for me. I can't say anything bad about Ukraine, because I became pregnant because of them.

Hugs x

bfrida profile image
bfrida in reply to mannamay

Thank you for reply. I was thinking about ukraine lots of time. And my hausband told me to contact them because we can speak volumes but without any actions. If I contact them I will know If I have a chances to get pregnant. Am I right?

It makes no difference to me if ukraine have some political problems. The main issue is to offer "yes, you are with us"

I'm trying to think positive. xxx

mannamay profile image
mannamay in reply to bfrida

good for you! stay positive and cheer up! it's a long way, but in the end it would'n even matter, you'll be a mother!

fingers crossed!x

mannamay profile image
mannamay

That's great! What news? Have they already answered your letter? Are you in? How do you feel? What does your husband say?

mannamay profile image
mannamay

Oh I see, it's ok to worry. But you are together and need to support each other. You did well and you will succeed sooner or later; your family is going to be full, making your life meaningful. however, not all at the same time.

Anyway, stop thinking about possible troubles and failures. think green!

Good luck to you! Everything is gonna be great!

bfrida profile image
bfrida in reply to mannamay

Thank you very much for such encouraging words. You think I'll be a good mother? I was dreaming about all nights long. How we will walk, sing songs, read fairytales before going to bed. Wish it all come true soon. Will they meet us at the airport, yes? I don't want to miss our driver, haha, it's killing me softly.

mannamay profile image
mannamay in reply to bfrida

Oh, that's nothing. I'm sure you'll be the best mother for your child, as we all are! Time runs fast, after all, and your dreams will come true soon.

I'm sure you will be met, as the clinic guarantees transfer. So calm down and don't worry. Try to think of it like it's another adventure and the prize will worthy!

bfrida profile image
bfrida in reply to mannamay

I want to get that prize right now. Feel a bit nervous. My husband told that he couldn't go with me to Ukraine.

He occupies a serious position at work and they don't want to give his extra days off. What to do? I thought we would go this week.

How do you think if I take my husband frozen sperm will it be ok with clinic? Or I should ask the consultant? If no we will go in Kiev in 2 weeks. That's tough

btw, how do you feel? any good news?

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