EPu scan results: Thank you to everyone... - Fertility Network UK

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EPu scan results

KittyK profile image
15 Replies

Thank you to everyone who offered support the other day really appreciated it. Unfortunately turns out Friday 13th was unlucky for me besides the snow and ice and not being able to sleep due to the worst indigestion ever.

Smaller twin hasn't grown at all since the last scan. So probably going to lose it. They said they'll check again at the 12 weeks scan. More waiting for something awful to happen.

And all they could say, each time I asked a question about it is that the first one is fine like that's supposed to make it hurt less like the other one doesn't matter. The scanographer pressed so hard on my belly I'm surprised she didn't do any damage. The most unsympathetic people just talking to me like the one I'm losing/lost doesnt matter. And they just say it happens all the time like that makes it easier. Now I have to go to work and pretend I'm normal. Great. Knew it was too much to hope that things would be fine from here on out. Honestly there is no consoling me and I didn't even want my husband to talk to me afterwards I just want to give up and I know that sounds dramatic and I'm lucky to even have one but I don't feel any better for it right now. It feels like the world is ending.

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KittyK profile image
KittyK
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15 Replies
MommaBear16 profile image
MommaBear16

Hi Kitty. I am so sorry to read this and sending you so much love. The loss of your baby is very real and, regardless of you having one healthy baby (which is amazing), the pain of the loss is completely justified. If you can take the day off from work I think this would be a good idea, you need some time and comfort. Don't let anyone tell you that the loss is less real or important because you have another baby, you have every right to feel how you feel. At my first scan the lady pushed so hard on my tummy she left a bruise; you are right some can be uncaring and unsympathetic but to them this is routine and they forget that to us these are life-changing moments. Wishing you peace over the coming weeks and the strength to keep going through your darkest moments. Lots of love x x x

Lucyloo81 profile image
Lucyloo81

No words will help sweetheart, feel what your want to feel. Sending you a massive hug 😘😘😘😘

Janer85 profile image
Janer85

I'm so sorry to hear this, sending lots of love to you xxx

I'm so sorry to hear this 🙁 ... it makes thing so much worse when there unsympathetic. I know when I'd been messed about with my chemical pregnancy and scanned and better scanned I lots the plot and told the women I was so pissed off ( not language I'd normally use) her attitude totally changed and she couldn't of been more lovely, I think mommabear16 is right sometimes it's just a job to them and don't realise what it means to us.

Get your hubby to give you a huge hug and treat yourself to something nice. I know it won't make everything better but may make yourself feel a tiny bit better.

Sending you hugs xxx

City74 profile image
City74

I'm so sorry to read this KittyK. It is no wonder you are upset and you have every right to be upset however many babies you are carrying. Thinking of you and your DH and your babies. xx

CountryCat profile image
CountryCat

I don't have the right words, but I am thinking of you and your husband, who now have to deal with such sorrow.

I don't understand how professionals who specialise in treatments that can go along with great heartbreak for thousands of people, cannot comprehend the grief of losing an (already-loved) baby. Their whole attitude must make it so much harder...

Very, very sorry! Do look after yourself x

emzlou25 profile image
emzlou25

Oooh babez am so so sorry i no how u feel..when they told me i would have an inevitable miscarriage with my little one then just left me 2 it..their so uncaring like our babys dont matter 😈 babez pray ur little one will be ok dont give up yet..my sister had this they told her shes loose 1 of her twins coz he wasnt growing..at nxt scan she went back and there he was and had grown since the last scan..both twins were born early he was a little small but there 3 months old now and hes grown and healthy..so dont give up on ur little one xxx

Smithha profile image
Smithha

So sorry to read this lovely, feel however you need to feel, look after yourself, and sending you lots of love xxx

DianeArnold profile image
DianeArnoldPartnerNurseFertility Network UK

Hi KittyK. So sorry to hear all of this - and yes, your little twin is important! It's so sad when this happens, so you can only hang on until the 12 weeks scan just case he/she has made some progress. If it's not to be, then your other little one should carry on growing as expected. Unfortunately, I do see this happen quite often and it is always such a shock when you scan and find one is not thriving. Have a rest when you can, and obviously I shall keep everything crossed. Thinking of you. Diane

Missy_22 profile image
Missy_22

Hi kittyk

Sorry to hear this today. So sad. I know how you feel this happened to me last month. You will grieve for the other twin but try and stay positive for the other bubba. take time out to come to terms with it.

I'm here if you need to private message me or ask me any questions.

take care 💗

liz1985 profile image
liz1985

Hi Honey...

I am sorry to hear about the news of your baby, just wanted to wish you all the luck in the world for your pregnancy really hope there is no further worries for you! Take care sweetie big hugs xxx

Lottypepper86 profile image
Lottypepper86

Sorry to hear that xxx

Awww I am so sorry to hear this and made even worse by the way you were spoken to and treated. Sending big hugs and thinking of you ❤️❤️❤️

yllek1982 profile image
yllek1982

So sorry to hear this-thinking of you xxxxxx

KittyK profile image
KittyK

Thank you everyone for your support I appreciate it. If I'm honest I've fallen into this depression I guess is the word, my husband is still so happy we have the other baby but I'm just sort or numb? I guess a defence mechanism because so much can still go wrong for that one too and it does seem every time we make a bit of progress something goes wrong. Feeling pretty negative and not really expecting much from the future to be honest. I appreciate all your support though thank you again xxx

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