Donor egg, Home or away

Hi, After one failed cycle of IVF we have just found out the only way forward for us is with egg donation. Has anyone any advice on this? It's a big thing to consider and my DH is slightly concerned about it not being my egg and how that will effect me.

We also don't know if it is best to stay local or opt for abroad. Does anyone have any recommendations/advice?

9 Replies

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  • We used DE for round 3 of ICSI. We stayed in the UK but other ladies have gone abroad. Sadly it didn't result in a BFP.

    It took me quite a while to get my head round using DE. The Donor Conception website was helpful for answering my queries about bonding with any resultant baby/babies. We also had to have an implications counselling session before beibg accepted. This was to advise us to tell any resultant children that they were conceived with DE but we'd already had that discussion. The DE felt like ours once they were fertilised but it was different to other rounds using my eggs as we weren't allowed to know details eg number of follicles.

    I think that as you'd be carrying the baby/babies you would start to bond before birth plus there is evidence the baby could get some of your DNA.

  • Ahhh really, that is interesting to know. I will check out the web site too. We have a consultation next week so I'm sure that will answer some more questions.

    So sorry to hear that it didn't work out for you on with your DE. Wishing you all the luck for any future attempt. xxx

  • Hi

    We went to Czech Rep for DE. The pluses in my opinion of opting to go abroad are; that it is less expensive, no waiting list, young donars.

    We got a BFP on both transfers but sadly the first transfer resulted in a miscarriage. From our second transfer( FET) we have a gorgeous wee princess.

    It is difficult choosing a clinic as there is so many out there, abroad and home. I found the website "fertility friends" great as they have discussion boards for many clinics home and away.

    Pm if you have any questions. Good luck!

    Jx

  • Passing de ivf abroad is definitely cheaper! We've got the long history and our fertility journey was not the shortest one.

    We experienced IUI and ICSI rounds home - got nothing but failures and broken hearts. I'm pretty ripe age and have not so much time left. The decision of moving onto egg donation wasn't smooth and fast as well. The idea of using another woman's eggs was weird at the beginning of our new route. And all those conversations about biological relation of the baby were torturing me. Furthermore I faced all that with our so to say family's proven fertility! (All the women in my family were/are fertile except ME!) But talking to more people in the similar position and investigation on the net really helped us much. This way we found eviternity.org specializing on egg donation and surrogacy. We had our free consultation with the patient coordinator Josephine in London. She was going through the same thing that time so we were absolutely understood and supported. In a couple of weeks we went to Ukraine, Biotexcom clinic and signed contract with them. It was the program of 5 shots for 9900 euro. All meds for the protocol included into the package price. Also selective reduction; housing, transportation and other minor issues. The most attractive about the program was that in case of 5 failures they refund all money paid.

    With our previous history of failures we thought that guarantee was great luck cause were so much tired of paying extra and almost out of the pocket.

    Fresh gave us more chance to try simply because you get more eggs. We Biotexcom clinic that fortunately had plenty of women for us to choose from. We selected a donor that is cute, tall, very athletic, had higher scores than me, dog lover like we are and many other things we liked about her. Plus, she is 25 years old!

    Over all my ICSI and IUI I never got more than 3 eggs and never past day 3-4. I always say it's a big difference from being 38 and 25 when it comes to fertility!

    This process gave us hope and a possibility at having a pregnancy and a child. So if this is the way for you first try to make peace in your head, then take action. The process is not ascomplicated as it seems.

    Wish you all luck in the world with your decision and further treatment! XX :)

  • Thank you so much, that is so helpful. I am also from a family where nobody has any fertility issues, I have been told my issues are just because I am older. :-(

    I wish you all the luck in the world with your journey. xx

  • There is more information on egg donation at overseas clinics within eggdonationfriends com, for those interested Good luck with yr treatment

  • Thank you, I will look that up too. Good luck to you where ever you are in your journey. xx

  • We are starting treatment using DE after Xmas, after 3 cycles with my own eggs I know the quality just isn't there with mine and we know 100% we want to be parents so We have found the decision surprisingly easy. I did loads of research and talked to so many clinics abroad and Uk, along with other people on various fertility sights etc and for us we have decided to stay in the UK.I like the idea that the child could find their biological mother if they desired (just our personal opinion) We are using a DE package where you sign up for 3 cycles and if none are successful to a live birth you get 70% refunded, it's a considerable price to pay out but we feel it suits our needs better (if you want any info just private message me) and knowing we have 3 cycles takes the pressure off slightly.

    Good Luck with your decision xxx

  • Hi Button-123,

    Thanks for your message, we are still in the early stages of the decision making/research process, but I am finding talking to people in the same situation a big help so I really appreciate it. I need to start calling a few clinics too.

    My DH would prefer to stay in the U.K. If we go ahead but I still feel it's worth researching abroad. Which clinic have you gone with, it sounds like a good package.

    We have a consultation today with a clinic at home but they have connections abroad too and you go for the actual egg transfer abroad. Hopefully today will help with a lot of our questions.

    Good luck in your treatment. xxxx

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