Constant dissapointment

Hi all.

Feeing a bit low today. I`m now CD45, possibly19- 21DPO(got a solid smiley CD24) so i`m assumimg it`s another anovulatory cycle as i been testing and BFN`s but very high OPK tests , i`ve had several of these since starting on Clomid 11months ago , my longest cycle being 54days. I turned 46!! last week and now i`m feeling whether it`s worth the disappointment every month as i know ny chances of getting pregnant and carrying to full term are about 1-2%. I`ve decided to try Tamoxifen for a couple of months. My OH will not entertain Egg Donation and really isn`t bothered as he has two grown up children from a previous relationship and has said he really doesn`t want to go through the sleepness nights again etc and we can`t afford it anyway, so i don`t really get any support. I feel very alone and have no one close to talk to. Maybe i should just accept it`s not going to happen for me and stop the constant dissapontment.

Baby dust to all

xxx

2 Replies

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  • Hi webchick - I'm not surprised you're feeling low with all of this to think/worry about. Bless you. It's such a shame your OH isn't more supportive, he can't possible understand how painful this is for you. It's such a hard road, we have to endure so much disappointment and it's so unfair. I'm always praying for a miracle for all of us. Lots of love to you, take care of yourself x x x

  • I'm 44 and doing my treatment on my own, however it is really hard and I don't get much support either so I know that feeling. At my clinic after you reach the age of 44, they won't treat you with your own eggs any more so I've just had a cycle using donor eggs and sperm. It is so expensive though and I guess we have to wonder how long do we keep going with it.

    I'm due to test next week and absolutely dreading it, if it's a negative my whole world will crash as I don't know if I can pay to do it again at £7000!

    I guess if your partner doesn't want any more children you may need to re think things - it's not easy though as my last partner didn't and yet I had that niggling feeling that I did so that's partly why I've done it on my own but wasn't the reason for our split.

    If you want someone to speak to, you can always message me.

    Hope you manage to get things sorted out x