I'm new here How can I help my chances? Overwhelmed newbie

[CheshireKit]

Hi all I've just joined the group as we're about to embark on IVF and I'm desperately seeking advice from others who have gone, or are going through the same thing. Reading many of the posts I can already see that our emotional and challenging journey to this point is not at all unusual which is comforting. We've been trying to get pregnant naturally for 4 years and fell pregnant last year. I was overjoyed but at my 8 week scan we found out I'd miscarried and my hope was shattered. I took it very badly but we're now getting back on the horse and trying IVF for the first time as the natural way hasn't worked since. My age is against me which makes me worry I'm just about out of time and my partner doesn't seem to be taking it very seriously not looking after himself physically. Does anyone have any advice about what's best to eat, drink, do to help things along? I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed with it all 

[Aimaim77]

Hi, and welcome to the forum. Trust me this forum is just great. I'm 39 in July and I started IVF this January, but in April I was told I had to stop the cycle which was crap. 

Anyway am due to start again nxt few weeks if all goes to plan!

What I would say is , this is a massive rollercoaster , there's are such highs and lows as well. 

Try not to plan to far or look to far ahead. 

Try to be as chilled as possible to and patience will become your middle name. 

As for your partner , I think they think worry about it just as much as us girls ( just takes them longer to get there heads around it) try to involve him does he or will he be going to appointments with you? 

As for diet ect - let him have a drink or burger if he wants but nearer the time of your treatment then explain you really need him to be more healthy . 

Get him some vitamins and make him lots of healthy dinners too. 

Good luck and take one step at a time . You will think at points your going mad but your not alone xxx

[CheshireKit in reply to Aimaim77]

Thanks so much Aimaim77  and hope84   it really helps being able to talk about it as im feeling quite alone in all this. I'll up our intake of veggies and try to speak to OH again about cutting back on the beer. Will look into acupuncture too 😳 Everything's worth a try! Xxx

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK in reply to CheshireKit]

Hi CheshireKit.  Just thought i would add my  list of "eats" too!  A good diet to have at this time consists of variety, however, I have listed some of the “good” things to have: Carbohydrates - Wholegrain bread and wholemeal pasta, oatmeal, brown rice. All fresh vegetables especially raw or steamed. Over boiling rids them of vitamins and minerals, pineapple juice, apricots, potatoes, all fruit and honey, beans, chickpeas and lentils. Protein - Organic meat if possible, poultry, fish, Milk and hard cheese, nuts and seeds. Fat - Extra virgin olive oil and sunflower oil, avocado and peanut butter, mackerel, sardines, nuts (especially Brazil and walnuts), seeds, sweet corn and sweet potatoes. The things to avoid are too much sugar, processed foods, ready meals, butter, ice cream etc. A little is OK, but not all the time. Drink plenty of water and only a little tea and coffee if feeling deprived. Cut right down or right out – alcohol and smoking. Oh and don’t forget the Folic Acid! Hope this helps and all the best! Diane

[CheshireKit in reply to DianeArnold]

Many thanks for the advice Diane. I'm going to stock up on extra healthy foods this weekend.  I'm trying to make sure we look after ourselves especially well given my age challenge (I'm 42 and sadly it just hasn't happened for us yet). Thanks again X 

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK in reply to CheshireKit]

Hi CheshirKit.  And don't forget the sunshine - while we have it!  Vitamin D!!  Diane

[hope84]

Hi

I turn 32 next month we have just had a failed first cycle back in April so we don't plan on trying again until year. We made sure we ate plenty of fresh fruits fresh veggies and ate fresh homemade meals drank plenty of water!! Make time for each other if he wanted a beer he had a beer it was his treat but he had no alcohol weeks before collection. Eat well drink well rest and exercise if you fancy chocolate have it!! We had a 5 day blastocyst transferred good grade clinic was happy with what we had but unfortunately didn't work out now awaiting review appt next month!!  A few of the ladies here have tried acupuncture before and during tmt!! Keep a positive mind lots of luck xx

[EmBlazes]

You are definitely not alone CheshireKit! I also felt quite overwhelmed at first and was SO grateful to have found this forum!

I also have the "challenge" of a not-so-healthy husband (who is also older at 53) so you aren't the only one to deal with that. Men are notoriously bad at looking after themselves so you definitely have to help him with that. I give my husband his vitamin every morning and try to encourage him to have 2 days clear from drinking every week (he has a couple of glasses of wine most days). 

For me, I had acupuncture after my first failed IVF cycle (BFN at the end) and got BFP on my second cycle. Unfortunately that ended in a miscarriage, and although that was sad, I was still just so happy that it actually WORKED that time. 

Now on cycle 3 and this will be our final time as we can't afford any more (not to mention the emotional rollercoaster) so fingers crossed we'll get a good result this time. 

I also know how you feel about being "older" as I'm 39. I try really hard to look after myself. I also have a thyroid condition so my diet can seem quite restrictive. The mediterranean diet is a good guide to follow when ttc - lots of fresh vegetables and meat/fish - healthy sources of carbs etc. I also try to cut down on refined sugar and that really seemed to help with my cycle in between IVF. I also try to avoid gluten and dairy - but that's because of my thyroid condition and I wouldn't recommend it to everyone!

When I had acupuncture - she told me I was doing too MUCH exercise for my constitution (it's very much tailored to the individual). So now I just walk but do a lot of walking and it is a great mood enhancer. 

Good luck with your journey and feel free to ask questions on here whenever you need to as it can be quite a confusing process to go through XXX

[CheshireKit in reply to EmBlazes]

Thanks so much EmBlazes  it really helps to know I'm not alone. Can u have acupuncture during treatment or is it best before it? Best of luck with cycle 3, keeping everything crossed for you xxx

[samrakkar]

Along with the healthy eating 

If recommend the endo scratch along with acupuncture or reflexology x 

[CheshireKit]

Ooh sounds interesting @samrakkar, what's an endo scratch? Xx