So.. after the getting a natural BFP last week, I am now having another mc. I woke up this morning with very heavy bleeding with clots and strong lower back pain.
This is my 3rd mc since first falling pregnant last July. I just don't know how much more I can take, the emotional as well as the physical effect really takes its toll.
My partner and my mum (they're the only two that knew I was pregnant) are so supportive. They don't really know what to say because they know nothing they can say will make it any easier and they're both just trying to help me think of the positives. Like, at least I am falling (it's just keeping a baby that seems to be a problem) and that now this is my 3rd they should do tests before actually starting the IVF process. I know all of this is true and I'm really trying to think like that, but at the same time the selfish part of me keeps getting upset and thinking 'why do we deserve this?'. My partner is a London Black cab driver, I work in the NHS, we're both young and honest people so why does it feel like we have constantly got bad luck.
Think I need this weekend of feeling sorry for myself, and for my partner, and then just try and be positive again. Just wonder how much more positivity I have left in me?