I'm feeling lost and angry again today. Had to do pregnancy test to make sure I had misscarried properly. And of course it said I'm not pregnant. I really did not want to do it. But had to. It was awful doing it. I knew what the answer would be. Now Im feeling back to square one. Not knowing what to do where we are going to go. Not the start to the new year I wanted. With this hanging Over us. And it seems everyone around us is having no trouble just falling pregnant. Going to go for a nap. See if that helps make me feel better at least for a bit. Sorry for rambling on and down post.