Hoping to conceive naturally while waiting for IVF

[seekingpeace]

We're booked to start IVF in January, so we have two more chances to conceive naturally before we start (currently in 2WW for one chance, next one due end of Nov). Does anyone have any experience of dealing mentally with the wait, and still hoping desperately to conceive naturally?

[bella79]

Hi seeking peace. I'm not sure how much advice I can give u as I'm not the best at dealing with all the waiting! It drives me mad. I guess I would say the usual things like keep urself busy, talk to someone when u need to , whether it's a friend, counsellor, or on this site and make time to relax. I like doing yoga, and have found relaxation cds helpful. Yes there is always the possibility that u wil conceive naturally so keep positive. However also make the most of ur time before starting ivf as I have found both rounds of ivf take over all aspects of ur life and it's hard to think of anything else . Hope that helps !Xxx

[seekingpeace in reply to bella79]

Thanks Bella, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who is rubbish at dealing with the wait. All the theories tell you not to obsess, and I know it makes no sense, but you just can't help it. I know what you say about making the most of our time before IVF - I'm really looking forward to starting the meds, because for a while I won't be able to conceive, so there's no point worrying about it. I'm sorry you've had 2 rounds - good luck, sending sincere wishes your way!

[Hidden]

Know how you feel .. I'm in the 2ww of my next period..hoping to conceive naturally too..esp since discovering my fertility issue was down to an underactive thyroid and am into my second month of taking thyroxine..it is now within optimum levels for conceiving..so I'm hoping it stand a chance of it happening now I haven't got great advice just all I can say is if you do fall without the need for ivf it's an bonus..that's wot I'm telling myself.. If it happens wonderful but if not don't give up hope coz there's ivf in the offering and for many couples it gives full fills their baby dreams I'm waiting for hubby's screening blood tests as was told by my Clinic to hold off doing em till my tsh was ok..hopefully will receive em by Thursday. Can't progress to the next stage till clinic has his results..

Good luck I hope you do conceive naturally.. Keep me updated

Take care

Jess

Xxxx

[seekingpeace in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Jess, you're right - I should focus on the positive, I do still have IVF to fall back on. Although I'll only get 1 cycle as I'm 40 in April, and they've given us a 15% chance of success. So not great. I keep telling myself that we've done everything right this month, so all I can do is wait. Still, doesn't stop me assessing how greasy my chin is (I take this as a sign of drop in oestrogen) and how much discharge I have, even though I'm only 6 days DPO (which I know is stupid as there will be no defining symptoms at all). Good luck with your wait!

[Hidden in reply to seekingpeace]

Bless you hunni.. I'm exactly the same.. Looking for possible signs.. When you want something this bad it's impossible not to obsess.. I dread to think wot I'll be like with ivf.. ! Awful!!! How long have you been ttc? Have you been given a reason off why it's not happened? My hubby and I have been ttc for 3 years and 2 months.. It took us 3 years one month to finally get a reason why I haven't conceived..it's a relief to have a reason.. But yeah it's really tough.. Esp with our friends having babies right now .. I'm happy for em but sad it's not us., we made extra effort since I've been taking thyroxine..feel like we have just as much chance as anyone else does Feel relieved to have ivf to fall back on... Hopefully that will take the pressure off it.. Although I would love to naturally fall and not have to endure ivf be a lot easier..!

I've seen ivf work with less than 15% there is always hope.. How many embroyos are you allowed to put back in?

When's the period due?

Good luck

Jess

Xxx

[seekingpeace in reply to Hidden]

Hey Jess, thanks for being there! We've been TTC for 2 years exactly (think this is the 24th natural cycle). We've passed all the tests so are officially unexplainably infertile. They've given us a 3% chance of conceiving naturally, which makes no sense since there's nothing wrong with us (apart from me being 39, but I was 37 when we started). You're right, you see lots of lovely stories on here about people with less than 10% having successful IVF.

My sister-in-law announced her pregnancy on Saturday, which really cut me up. happy for them, but sooo distressed. None of the family know we're even trying.

We're allowed 2 embryos but my husband is insisting on only one - he's totally freaked out by the possibility of twins. I had always wanted twins, so was quite thrilled at the thought IVF might make that possible, but then I read that the chances of something going wrong at any stage, including birth defects are significantly higher with twins, so I'd kind of decided just having one embryo implanted would be enough (that's assuming of course we get one...but now I'm just catastrophising...)

My period is due Tues/ Weds next week - what about you?

Take care

xxx

[Hidden in reply to seekingpeace]

My sister had a baby last year that was really hard..

Mines due then too how odd..!!

Even when you obe transfered with ivf if has a greater chance of splitting hence identical twins..

I think you have to weigh up all the pros and cons..you don't want to take risks if you don't have too..I think you're being sensible..knowing me if I had the choice I'd have 2.. complete our family in one hit they're only let me have one I'm under 35.. it prob does make it a more high risk complicated pregnancy..after all you would've gone through that's the last thing you need.. You wanna smooth sailing pregnancy

That is very bad odds ESP if it's unexplained.. There's always a chance keep going it only takes one egg and one sperm to meet up I do hear of a lot of women of 40 having babies it is totally possible., my late gran had my mum at 40 and that was in the 50s where there was no fertility help.. Not like now.. Have your drs told how you can increase your chances? Some women are advised to take dhea supplements etc..?

Good luck for next week let me know how it goes.. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you xxx

[seekingpeace in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Jess, must have been hard seeing your sister all the time with her wonderful pregnancy journey and new baby. What's dhea supplements? My doctor hasn't recommended anything - I did start taking Chasteberry, but then I stopped because I thought self-medicating isn't such a good idea.

I have no choice on the single embryo - my husband says it's the one thing he won't compromise on. But I hadn't thought that it might split and we might still get twins - that would be great

I'll be thinking of you next week - good luck and loadsa baby dust xxx

[bella79]

Of course u can't help obsessing! U would need the patience of a saint not to get frustrated with all the waiting! Yes-once u start the ivf it does take the pressure off trying to conceive naturally. Like jess1981 said-u have ivf to fall back on if it doesn't happen naturally. I know it's hard not to think about ages and statistics but all it takes is one good embryo for it to b a success! Wishing u lots of luck xxx

[seekingpeace in reply to bella79]

You're right - it only takes 1. I even think that about conceiving naturally - it only takes 1 little sperm and 1 little egg. Thanks for the kind wishes, that means soooooo much xxx

[Hidden]

Hi seekingpeace, We have just started IVF i have just started Buserelin injectings about a week ago now, i don't really think there is a way of dealing with the wait we had been trying to conceive naturally for years but it just never happened for us we just thought one day it would just happen that i would fall pregnant but it never happened, months turned into years for us after me and my husband going for tests we found out that my husband had a low sperm count, IVF was the only thing for us in having a baby and were just praying to god we get a result at the end of it. It is really hard to cope with in hope of wanting a baby and just wanting to conceive naturally your self seeing all your friends and family members and other women with it happening for them so easy and you just wondering why cant it be that easy for you. Anway i wish you all the luck in the world in trying to conceive naturally and hope it works for you before going for IVF, if you need anyone to talk to about ivf just msg me im happy to try and answer any questions. X

[Hopeful1982]

Hi ladies

My hubby and I are in a similar position. Have had all our tests and they can't find any problem. We're going back to the fertility clinic in the new year to discuss starting ivf. In the meantime we're still hoping to conceive naturally. To relax I just try to keep myself as busy as possible but I do have the occasional melt down too! I find the best thing is team sport. It's pretty much the only time I don't think about babies!

My sister-in-law has recently had a baby. It has been really hard so I can understand all those feelings. They tried for 1 month. When they fell pregnant we had been trying for exactly 1 year. It felt so unjust.

Wishing you all lots of luck. Wouldn't a BFP be the best Christmas present ever?

MC x