All Over the place emotionally

[ZiggyandBC]

hi everyone,

I hope I don’t upset anyone with this I just wanted to get some advice and hopefully speak to anyone who’s felt similar.

I’m 6 weeks pregnant and the sickness has well and truly hit. I feel sick all day every day and nothing helps! I’m bed bound for most of the day and stuck inside.

I’ve been a hormonal wreck since I started not feeling well. I’m just so full of worries and doubts and it all just feels suddenly real and I’m terrified.

I keep having these awful thoughts and worries that my partner will leave me and how will I cope if that happens? And how will I cope if I have to do this on my own?

My partner is wonderful and reassures me but these thoughts are still there. I do have anxiety and depression and am still taking me meds but not sure if I’m even absorbing them with how much I’m being sick.

I feel so guilty for not feeling overwhelmingly happy as all I feel is constant worry and keep thinking ‘what if this happens…’

Thank you to anyone who’s read and would really appreciate any advice as I’m spending most days crying in bed!

[Sunflower35]

Sorry to hear this! Are you having any counselling at the moment? I expected to be a emotional wreck through IVF and had some counselling which I have just stopped at the beginning of the third trimester, my hormones and exhaustion seem to have taken over so I don’t have the energy to worry! It may be worth reaching out and finding help until you feel more reassured and less affected by hormones. They can be horrible and nausea makes things a lot worse. On the other hand, be kind to yourself, you are going through a lot! I am a worrier too in general but you need to give space to your feelings, acknowledge them and let them be, pause and move onto what you can control in this moment, rather than engaging them or trying to fight them, which would increase your anxiety. Take one day at a time and give yourself a break, it will get better!

[ZiggyandBC in reply to Sunflower35]

Thank you so much for your lovely reply. I’m not currently having any counselling but I’ve been thinking maybe I need some. The only trouble is the waiting lists! It’s helped a lot just to tell my partner and get it off my chest. I told my mum too who reassured me.

It’s such a rollercoaster. Hope you’re doing well?

Xx

[Shaze12 in reply to ZiggyandBC]

Hey hun anxiety and depression is awful I have been there had counseling etc. The only thing worked is (time) and learning to use negative to positive. I have learnt that no matter how much I worry or stress it won't change outcome in the end what ever it is.. so really it's just a waste of time worrying it may never happen also... I feel you when it comes to feeling sick I am also in the same boat this pregnancy is hard and it's definitely my last I have a 7 year old and a 18month old and he was up all night so I feel like I could just sleep all day.. but in fact I don't have that luxury right now until hubby gets in from work. So I'm feeling so tired and sooo sick but at the same time I chose this so do feel grateful at the same time. Hopefully the Sickness will get better for us.

[ZiggyandBC in reply to Shaze12]

Hey! Sorry to hear you’ve struggled too. I’ve had counselling through my teenage years and more recently but I think it’s a whole new can of worms adding hormones into the mix and such a big life event. I’m hoping the sickness gets easier but my boyfriends sister suggested I ask for anti sickness meds as this is what she had when she had terrible sickness with her little girl. If I don’t get any better I’m going to ask if I can have some because it’s no good feeling like this everyday! I can barely keep anything down! Sending you lots of love to you and your family ❤️

[HollyT7]

Get to your go for sickness meds, my worst regret with our first is not doing that. ❤️

[ZiggyandBC in reply to HollyT7]

I’ve been told this by my partners sister too. I’m going to call my GP tomorrow and beg for some. I did call them yesterday for advice but the nurse said to try peppermint tea which I have and didn’t help 😅 They seem reluctant to give me any but it can’t be any good me feeling like this!

[HollyT7 in reply to ZiggyandBC]

Ive tried everything. My midwife said to play on it when speaking with them, not that I needed too. I’d explain that you feel sick all the time, your drinking water but are sick during the day.

[ZiggyandBC in reply to HollyT7]

I’m going to ring them today. The physical impact is affecting my mental health too which I also want to speak to them about so hopefully they take me seriously x

[Fruitandflowers]

Please don't feel guilty about not being happy, somewhere underneath the hormones and anxiety you are but everything else is taking over and you really don't need to add guilt to that mix. I had awful sickness and at one point was just sitting with my forehead on the table crying, surrounded by every ginger based food and drink there is, with my husband confused going 'but you wanted this, didn't you?' - if I'd had the strength I would haven thrown one of the massive ginger roots at his head. It's way more complicated than that, especially after IVF and you can feel anxious, scared, upset, unwell, tired, relieved, sad... and happy, all at the same time. You don't need to be Pollyanna but if you're on meds for depression and anxiety speak to your GP about that too as you may need some careful monitoring. It's such a cliché but take it a day - or even an hour - at a time. Eventually this bit and the negative stuff is just a memory you can let slide.

[ZiggyandBC in reply to Fruitandflowers]

Thank you lovely. I was absolutely over the moon when I first found out! Then as soon as the sickness kicked in I’ve just been miserable and full of anxiety! Talking about how I feel has really helped and my partner is great for reassuring me ❤️ I think once the physical symptoms slow down I’ll hopefully feel more like myself xx

[Hidden]

Oh gosh!! There is nothing glamorous about pregnancy, just because you’ve wanted it for ages you can still complain and feel fed up!!! It’s a huge onslaught of hormones and changes. Intrusive thoughts are really really challenging. Yeah I’ve had anxiety & depression like many of the others, You will be flagged up and taken care of by team when you get to booking apt - so might not have such a wait list . For example I’m in my second pregnancy and getting a couple of extra HV home visits and support etc. Do you have any spare cash? If so I highly recommend a nausea relief band you use conductivity gel with it - it’s been such a saviour to me honestly transformative . Have a look into them some are around £100 and some £200 maybe also try eBay?

Get some good tv or audio books in and do you best to be kind to yourself ie talk to yourself like you would a friend x

[ZiggyandBC in reply to Hidden]

Thank you lovely!! It really isn’t glamorous is it 😂 Luckily I’m going to be speaking to a psychologist this week so hopefully things will feel better soon. It’s so hard emotionally as well as physically! I’ll look into the nausea relief band! Anything is worth a go! Xxx

[Pnw2020]

Hi. Congratulations and sorry to hear how you are feeling.Some great advice above.

Have you done an early bird referral to the hospital? Once you have that they can make sure you receive the ante natal mental health support you need.

In the meantime I am not sure if you have private IVF but they normally include counselling in their packages.

Sickness wise you could try the travel bands

myrtleandmaude.com/products...

I also quite liked their peppermint sweets.

Some people find acupuncture helps.

Finally, take each day as it comes. Try and eat something whenever you want. my diet was very beige for the first trimester! Don’t feel guilty about that!

[ZiggyandBC in reply to Pnw2020]

Thank you for the lovely reply ❤️ I’ve got my first midwife app booked in and thankfully I also have a psychologist app booked in for this week so I’m hoping that will help. I’m currently living on ice pops! Seems to be the only thing that doesn’t make me sick! Even though I guess it isn’t technically food! 😅 I’m just happy if I can keep anything down at the moment! Sending you lots of love xx

[Redsequin in reply to ZiggyandBC]

Hi lovely, sorry to interrupt the convo but just wanted to give a tip: the Jude's fruit and veg lollies are great for a few extra nutrients!

[Lamagarden]

Hi Ziggy, I’m so sorry to hear how poorly you are feeling. When you speak with your GP insist on some immediate psychological support, ie. some talking therapy or CBT, this will support your mental health. Wishing you all the best xx

[Lydia2210]

Hi Ziggy, sorry to hear how you’ve been feeling. I’m currently 8.5 weeks and have also spent the last few weeks feeling terrible - constantly nauseas, exhausted, have felt useless as a girlfriend - constantly moaning to my partner and unable to help around the flat. I‘ve also been beating myself up for not feeling happy and grateful about what has happened or for being a better girlfriend/ friend / colleague etc. I haven’t quite had the same level of intrusive thoughts or depression that sounds tough, but it hasn’t been great. It must be all the drugs we’re still pumping ourselves with and the natural hormones that are going on. Hopefully in a few weeks we’ll come up for air and will feel a bit more ourselves again and able to do things. Nothing to advice on from my side, but just to say, you’re not alone in how you’re feeling Xxx

[ZiggyandBC in reply to Lydia2210]

Hello lovely! Sorry you’re struggling too! You’ve summed up how I’m feeling perfectly! I’ve had to have the last 2 weeks off work which makes me feel so guilty! My partner is working overtime to compensate and I just feel a bit useless at the minute! All I’m doing is sitting around all day 😣 I really hope it calms down over the next few weeks because I am well and truly fed up! Sending you so much love ❤️❤️

[Shaze12]

Hi Ziggy was thinking of you how is ur sickness? Mine has reduced dramatically. Thank god! Xx

[ZiggyandBC in reply to Shaze12]

Hi angel! It’s still kicking my arse! I was prescribed anti sickness meds but they don’t help that much! I’m 8 weeks at the minute so I’m just praying it slows down over the next few weeks! 😫 I’ve never been as sick in my life!! Throwing up every day is no joke! I’m so glad yours has reduced! It must be such a relief, hopefully mine will stop soon! 🤞🏻🤞🏻 Xx