Is it possible to pull it off taking pills, mainly Sildenafil/Tadalafil without my GF knowing it?

[persona_non_grata]

By the way, I have no idea where to start. As I don't have experience with these drugs. Or what they do to in terms of getting aroused, staying hard for how long, what happens once ejaculated, replenish time between and long term dependency effects both chemically and physiologically. I'm a very physiological man, mental blocks such as being possessive makes me go on depressive episodes.

I am fairly healthy 33 M and can pull off a 5K three times a week. (With breaks in-between, lol)

Never taken pills before and I have just realised I have severe depression and anxiety induced inability.

Used to be pretty normal arousals in my teenage years but after a couple of breakups several years ago, I have a lot of trust issues and most recently career stresses. At least that’s what I think and i should check it out somehow somewhere. I really don’t know where to start in London, having just moved to a new place. GP's are closed and online GPs seem wrong.

Outside sex, she absolutely makes me calm and worry less about life in general when I am with her. Maybe I am over romanticising her because of having been single for a long time. When it comes to sex, I don’t want to disappoint her. Like at all.

I wanted to try the pills before penetrative sex. Looking for general suggestions/opinions on how to handle this. 😑

[BerkshireBear]

The quick answer is that it is easy to take a pill without anyone knowing. But after that it gets a lot more complicated.

Each of those drugs works differently on each individual. So the best we can give you is generalities. Neither one gives you an erection, both require you to be in the mood and then they assist your body in creating and maintaining the erection. It is well known that depression, and general and performance anxieties are major erection blockers. Your story suggests that you are aware of that and that your life situation is contributing to it. Some help from a psychological counselor is often helpful in learning to better handle those stressors. OTOH, you say that this new friend is a great calming influence, so she might indeed be a major factor in making this work for you.

I said each works differently for each person, that is 110% true. But generalities can be stated. Viagra/Sildenafil is typically faster acting and shorter lived in your body, Cialis/Tadalafil has a much longer active time. If your date seems progressing in the right direction you can pop in a V/S and should be ready in 20 minutes. C/T is known as the weekend pill, suggesting that you can take it and it will be ready to assist anytime in the next day or two. This all relates to the "average" or "normal" residency of each drug in your bloodstream, V/S is more like hours, C/T is more like 1-2 days. BUT each individual is different.

Also you must consider how each drug works for you individually, that is its effects and side-effects. All the drugs in this class are noted for having side effects, some can even be serious. Remember they were originally being developed for heart and blood pressure regulation, so they are potent. I personally react strongly to V/S both for erections and with agonizing scary side effects, but find that C/T is less effective for erections but has none of the negatives. Just the opposite for my best friend. Also V/S is available in a wide variety of strengths (25 to 100mg), while C/T for sexual purposes is typically 20mg. You can vary the V/S to see what works best without triggering side-effects (best with a doctor's supervision). Some of us find these drugs act "once and done", others find they can support multiple erections.

Bottom Line: Psychology probably plays a bigger role than any of the drugs in this class. And the effect of each is all highly individualized, so much so that I would recommend a few trial sessions while masturbating with whatever stimulus you prefer just to see what works best for you. And don't forget the positive comment you made about your girlfriend, give her a try too, she might be all you need.

[persona_non_grata in reply to BerkshireBear]

Thank you.

[StuartLondon in reply to BerkshireBear]

The main problem with these drugs is if you are taking blood pressure tablets for stress it is dangerous. Talk to GP. It is not a magic bullet.

[persona_non_grata in reply to StuartLondon]

Thank you.

[JPnSD]

Suggest you do this in consultation with your primary care doctor. Side effects (e.g. pronounced heartburn, headache, etc.) can exacerbate certain conditions. Your doctor can also help with dosage to start with and discuss generic vs. name brands.

[rdmercer1953]

why would you need to tell her?

[scout70]

I'm an older man, 70, and have used tadalafil successfully for a couple of years. I take 5mg in the morning which gives me the ability to produce erections until the following morning and sometimes beyond. Sometimes go down to 2.5 or up to 10. My gf doesn't know. No need to bring up the subject!