Ahhh just had enough

[rachyroo1234]

So today is one of those days where I just wwnt to give up and start all over again with no endometriosis no pain no fatigue no sudden miegraines that happen for no reason to be able to be happy again and just relax at night and not have to worry about anything or everything be able to work a full 5 days instead of 4 and canceling on work if I am having a bad day with pain and risking losing my job. Endometriosis have really put a spanner in the works for me becoming a lorry driver and starting up my own company due to all the pain meds that I am on they will not take me on the course and it's so frustrating and annoying to the point that I cant take it anymore. One of the things that really annoys me is people putting me down and telling me I cant do stuff and I am trying my best in all ways that I can there is nothing else I can do but try my best. The one thing that is making me happy at the moment is the fact i am able to take pain killers go to the gym and work out as I have been told I can no longer ride horses and that was my only stress relief untill I started the gym.

Sorry about the long vent but just had enough.

[jenipovey]

I just want you to know, you are not alone!

I am currently in the exact same situation as yourself! I was diagnosed 4 and a half years ago, two excision surgeries and multiple different other ‘experiments’ my consultant has tried.

And I have never been in as much pain as I am today! It is such a physically debilitating condition, but I think people don’t understand the mental constraints it can also put on you - the constant whimpering of ‘you can’t do that’, or ‘you shouldn’t’. It affects everyone.

We all have days/weeks where we just want free of it all, to just have a single day where you don’t experience pain!

You are not alone, and don’t ever feel like you all! There are thousands of us all here, with an open mind and and open ear. If you ever need to vent, all you have to do is message xx

[rachyroo1234 in reply to jenipovey]

Thank you for your kind words. It's just annoying I used to be fit and healthy and loving life and in a matter of 3 months becoming so ill with blood poisoning due to one out of two cysts bursting. I feel bad when I have to cancel on people and trips out / away due to the pain. It does take a huge toll on mental health and when surrounded by family who dont understand sucks so bad.

[jenipovey in reply to rachyroo1234]

I was the same - I would be up walking the Lake District or Scottish Highlands. Within a matter of a week, from consultation visit to surgery, it was all stripped from me!

I’ve gone past cancelling on people, I simply do not plan anything. I cannot remember going out with friends, other than a quick bite for breakfast with them. It is horrible! Luckily the few good friends I have, are very considerate of my pain. But it still isn’t nice having to miss out on everything that a 24-year old should be doing!

[rachyroo1234 in reply to jenipovey]

Hugs it just sucks I turn 28 in june and in flying to Spain for a week but so scared of eating in case it causes exstream pain