Emotional: I feel like no one wants to... - Endometriosis UK

Endometriosis UK

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louisepercy2000 profile image

I feel like no one wants to understand the pain and emotions that I am going through at the moment. I even feel like my boyfriend doesn’t want to know about it.

He keeps telling me how well I am doing but I then feel like he’s saying it purely to shut me up as I complain about how much pain I am in allllll the time ☹️

I just need someone to talk to 😢

11 Replies

I can relate 100% - my boyfriend tries but he really isn’t very sympathetic, it makes me feel bad for complaining about the pain but it’s just so bad. I’ve tried being more open about my endo and treatment etc and it seems to be making it a bit easier. Hang in there - they care they just can’t understand ❤️ x

Big cuddles!

It's horrible when you look fine but then are in agony. My fiancé is good but doesn't know what to say when I get emotional about it either. That's great that he says you are doing well and really good to hear you can mention it to him.

Do you have any friends you can talk to? I find my girlfriend's tend to be better at understanding, even if none of them have endo.

You can always drop me a message on here if you like? I had an awful time before my lap and didn't have many people to talk to. I've found this forum a life saver. I hope you feel better soon or find something to help with your symptoms, this illness is just horrible.

Xxx

Thank you so much for your message, I just feel like I’m complaining all the time with my pain 😣xx

You are allowed to complain about pain1 Pain is horrible, its uncomfortable and raining and as its invisible its so frustrating!! Moan away! Im at work today and already on codeine but trying to power through, so I will definitely be complaining to my bf and demanding a hot bath and cuddles when I get home.

Moan away and get it all out - even if its online.

Pain isn't nice, don't feel bad about complaining about it!

SENDING BIGGER CUDDLES! xxxx

I will give you a message about how my gynae appointment goes this morning.

Surely it’s not healthy for me how every single morning I am taking codeine and mefenamic acid 😣

Xxxx

Ill be thinking of you, fingers crossed you get some help at your gynae appointment. Let me know how it goes.

Oh I was living on tramadol before my lap, and my old manager still thought it was "just a bit of period pain". (I cant eye roll dramatically enough about that!!).

Sending you positive vibes, I really hope it all goes ok for you at your appointment xxx

Ive felt exactly how you feel and I just ended up shutting myself up and not talking to anyone about it, which really did not help at all, I don't recommend not talking about it.

It's really difficult for people to understand because it's an invisible illness and because they can't see the pain they can't relate. Everyone only understands from their level of perception and if they've never dealt with an invisible illness then it's hard for them to understand. I think that's why this community is so beneficial because we all are going through it together and understand each others pain.

My boyfriend also comments on how well I'm doing and I think that's just because they don't know how to be there for you and just trying to be supportive. I'd suggest sitting down with the people you care about and the people you need to help get you through this and just explain what a day in the life of you is like and how you need/want them to be there for you and what they can do to help. I did this with my boyfriend and also asked what it was like from his point of view, and we discussed it for ages and I explained everything to do. Although he can't relate, he tries so hard to understand for me cos he knows I need that support. Even if he just makes me a hot water bottle when I've been in pain, it's those little things he wouldn't of known unless I told him.

I suffer a lot with fatigue as well which people mark down as laziness so I started to explain this to people by showing them the spoon theory which explains what it's like living with a disability/chronic illness (might be useful):

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spo...

C765 profile image
C765 in reply to C765

Sorry typo "explained everything to him"

louisepercy2000 profile image
louisepercy2000 in reply to C765

Thank you so much for your reply xxx i feel like a burden to him as I know he has his own life and things to worry about, he doesn’t really need me blabbering on about something so constantly xxx

C765 profile image
C765 in reply to louisepercy2000

I feel exactly the same and he's constantly looking after me and I feel awful, but I know I'd do the same for him. And remember you are a big part of his life as well so your worries are his as well xx

Hi Louisepercy2000,

I am sorry to read your post, please do not feel alone. Endometriosis UK run support groups across the country and online as well as the telephone helpline all run by volunteers like myself with experience of endometriosis: endometriosis-uk.org/get-su... if you do want someone to talk to.

Best Wishes,

M Mary, Volunteer Administrator

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