Feel defeated but sometimes Endometriosis just wins!

Currently walking (dragging myself) home from work, where I lasted one whole hour before I burst into tears in my boss' office and told her I would have to go home.

My pain has been awful for the last 2 weeks but I have managed to drag myself around work.

Today Endometriosis has won! Now I feel so angry with myself and defeated by this awful disease that I work so hard to not let take over my life!

Sorry for the rant I Just needed to have a moan and get it off my chest that sometimes I feel like screaming 'it's not fair' and 'why me!?'. Now I'm going to dose myself up with painkillers and antisikcness tablets and feel sorry for myself for the rest of the day!

Take care ladies hope you's are well!

Love Holl x

8 Replies

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  • <3 take care of yourself Holly, endo absolutely sucks sometimes but the fact you’ve battled on for the past two weeks shows how strong you are! Hope you are feeling better soon xxx

  • Thank you soo much MaryLou! Means a lot! Hope you are well. Take care x

  • You poor thing, it's horrible to feel so low to the point that you break down.

    I was put on oral morphine last week as like you I was at my lowest point. I don't like taking painkillers at all and this seemed like a huge step in the wrong direction. However, it has completely changed my pain level and mood for the moment. I am only taking it before bed to stretch out my pain free sleeping from 11pm-beyond 4am. It has worked so far and the extra sleep has broken the cycle even though the pain hasn't gone. I find the morphine easier to cope with than codeine as I can take less for more relief and I am waking more alert and less sick if i follow any rules. That may be down to the extra sleep and the fact that this one is working at the moment. It may be worth a conversation with your GP. I expect the downside is I will rely on it at least nightly for pain free sleep unless the problem is sorted which we know is a long battle and possibly about coping rather than solving.

    Take care and try to switch off and have a day to rest.

  • Glad you have found something that helps ease your pain slightly. If the flare up does not ease then I will go back to my GP! and thank you for taking the time to reply! Take care! x

  • Hi Holl sorry to hear your feeling so low. I'm having one of those days too. I had to call into work sick today which I try so hard to avoid and I broke down too on the phone to my work and infront of my gp this morning. The constant pain would grind anyone down and the fact that you have worked in pain for two weeks shows how incredibly strong you are!! today your body just needs to rest so make sure you do rest, I'm currently on the sofa with a hot water bottle trying to stay positive that tomorrow will be a better day 😊 Don't feel defeated it is not your fault that you have this pain and it is normal to have days when it gets the better of us. I hope you feel better soon!!!!

  • Sorry to hear you was also having a rubbish day and I hope today is better for you! Thank you soo much for taking the time to reply and for your kind words 😘. Take care Holl x

  • Hi holly, so sorry to hear how you're feeling. It's such an awful debiliting disease that only us with this condition truly understand. I feel a combination of guilt and "why me?" all the time. Big hugs and keep your chin up xxx

  • Hi! So sorry you are in pain :( Have you tried the diet for endo? I read that eliminating xeno- and phytoestrogens might decrease our estrogen level by 30%.

    After my lap I changed my diet to vegan. So far Im fine but everyone is of course different.

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