Praying for a baby every night

[Brennac05]

Hi my name is cassy I have been trying with my partner for 6 years now to have a child. I went to my doctors and have been for every test under the sun I have repeated some twice . I have been in pain for a long time now it had become the normality . and a few weeks ago there have told me that I need to go in for surgery because they think the endo has spread to my bowels not just my uterus I hope and pray every night that this would just disappear I ask myself why me do I not deserve a chance to be a mum and just hope one day life will give me a chance.

[Mummy1982]

Hello

Ever so sorry to here what you are experiencing.

I don't have any experience of this myself ( other tham having endo) but my sister is currently in the same position as yourself has pcos and endo and has had 5 failed rounds of Ivf and a eptopic pregnancy.

It's absolutely heartbreaking when it's all you want so so badly.

Please do not give up hope.

Are you trying everything you can from a natural approach? for example supplements they aren't a miracle but i have heard diet change and supplement have helped some people achieve this.

I really hope your wish comes true soon and you become a mother soon xx

[Brennac05 in reply to Mummy1982]

Hi thank you for your message back ir means a lot . I have tried everything I Google and speak to people all the time and think of things I aint doing but I couldn't possible do anymore . I think it's up to faith now wethere it wants or thinks I deserve to be a mum I always think and believe that maybe I was a bad person in a past life . I am waiting for another operation now to see how far this disease has spread x

[Mummy1982 in reply to Brennac05]

Aw hun

That's awful that you feel that way. Don't doubt yourself I'm sure you have not done anything to deserve what you are experiencing.

Try to stay strong I know it must be so hard when you want something so badly.

I hope that your next op goes well and hopefully you conceive before or I have heard a lot have ladies have conceived in the few months after there lap.

I hope you manage to fulfil your dream of being a mum soon I'm sure you will be amazing. fingers crossed for you xx

[Brennac05]

well after waiting 7 years for results on having a lap operation the hospital have canceled me off their list with no exploitation just a letter through the door and now they expect me to go back to the fertility clinic and repeat all my test again which will waste another 2 years of my life i am jut physically and emotionally tried of being in pain and stress don't know how much more i can take . i never thought it would ever be so hard and its hard to talk to family and friends cause they don't understand not really but can honestly say i feel as thou i could go into early stages on depression . i feel for my partner too as i feel as thou i should let me go and be happy with someone else and to have a family he deserves .

[Disneygirl]

It isn't fair that it works this way, such loving women desperate to be mum's experiencing this difficulty and pain. Especially when some girls seem to get pregnant just holding hands!!! Be kind to yourself and be patient, 6 years is a long time I know but give yourself a break and relax. I have been told by many that when you stop trying that's when it happens, stress can have a very big impact on your reproductive system as it is all hormones. Just be nice to yourself, you have done all you can for now and respect how much your body and mind have gone through. I think we girls all need to give ourselves a little more credit now and again. We go through alot xxx

[Brennac05 in reply to Disneygirl]

I do agree but there is only so much bad news you can take I have tried my best to relax and not focus on getting pregnant I used to think It will happen when it happens but never seems to come with the extent of endo attack my body it's impossible so i need this operation to stand any chance . I am sorry I sound so negative but I don't feel anything else anymore with all the let down I have had I feel like I'm loosing the battle x