Sorry if this is long, I just felt I needed someone to talk to and didn't know what to do.
I have endo and was finally diagnosed a few years ago, even though I knew it was what I had but just took over ten years to get the diagnosis.
I had a laparoscopy and the consultant said I had it quiet bad as they couldn't remove any of the damaged areas to help. But no one has been overly clear on how bad I have it, what it means etc. Thw consultant who I said after being in hospital advised me to take my pills back to back with only a break every 3 months and that did help. She also was very clear about when thinking about children I should try a few years before getting near to 35 as once I get to that age or older I'll have even more reduced chance.
I just got married this year and turned 33, so we started talking about children and I've come off my pill. The worry I have is in not 100% sure I want children, I've never been maternal and never been overly keen on kids. There's times in recent years where I've warmed to the idea and so agrees to come off my pill. But I think I've felt more pressure to come off it because of the endo. The more I keep thinking about it the more I'm not sure I want them, but feel I should start trying because if I leave it it could be too late with the endo and I getting older. I'm now worried I'm trying before I'm ready, but if I don't try and then decide I do want them in a year or two I could regret not trying. I feel so confused and under pressure with this looming 35 and the endo. Plus my husband is more keen on kids and I'm finding that pressure as well.
I was just interested if anyone else had felt this way and wasn't sure about kids but felt like they had to try? I feel so torn all the time and keep getting upset as I don't know what's best to do. Just wanted to post on here as just wanted to get this off my chest and have someone to talk to. It has made me feel a little better just writing this down.
Thanks for listening!