P***ed off my gynae dr and now he is treating me badly? Can I get a new one before my op in 2 weeks?

Hi all, basically my dr after loads of tests and an exploratory this time last year told me I have cysts and endo on my left ovary and endo in my POD. Well I was admitted into hospital a few weeks ago for pain in my sides and belly. For 5 days I saw 5 different drs who told me 5 different things but didn't do a single test apart from a blood and urine sample. I was given a internal scan by a dr who told me I had a grapefruit sized cyst filled with fluid, turns out it was my bladder. I was told I had endo in my bowels, how they got that with no tests I don't know. And then on the last day the head of the team, my gynae I'm under discharged me and told me I'm making a fuss over nothing as there is nothing wrong with me. Yet he discharged me on morphine pills, anti sickness, eastrogen and codine?? I think it's because I fell out with a nurse the day before because after I told her to get out my room the rest of the lovely staff suddenly became mean and very uncaring. Including my dr who discharged me even though I was still being sick after every meal and hadn't been for a wee in 36 hours.

This mans meant to be operating soon and I'm terrified he won't put the effort in I deserve. And why am I having an op if there is nothing wrong with me? Why am I in so much pain if there is nothing wrong? I'm feeling so scared and very let down.

What do you think the chances of me getting a new dr will be when my op is in 2 weeks? X x

22 Replies

  • Zero.

    If you want to cancel this op - you need to ask your GP to refer you to a new gynaecologist and back you go on the waiting list for the new person. and then another waiting list for surgery if that is deemed to still be required.

    You cannot swap Surgeons and get that surgeon to undertake your surgery just because the operating room is pre-booked, because surgeon No.1 is allocated to it and probably all day too.

    I don't think you did yourself any favours by abusing nursing staff, even if you felt you had good cause to. There is a protocol for complaining - through PALS. Getting their backs up when you are the patient, I am sure you have come to realise - is not the best move you could have made how ever frustrated you are with pain and misdiagnosis etc.

    Surgeons for the most part are professional and they won't let your wide awake behaviour cloud their surgical expertise when you are under general anaesthetic.

    You do need to know whats going on inside more than ever, after that trip to hosp.

    So my advice is go ahead with the op. Apologise to the Surgeon on the offchance he was made aware of your encounter with that nurse.

    Let the surgeon do his job and see what's up inside and what needs doing to it.

    They may end up being the ones to eat humble pie when endo is found.

  • I didn't abuse nursing staff, she was horrible to me and I told her to leave. I'm a HCW myself so I know that how she was treating me was wrong.

    I tried complaining to pals, that's what made everyone so mad at me. I even got told off for going to them by my dr.

  • Hi Jofus89,

    I agree with Impatient especially in respect of the surgeon's professionalism once you are wheeled into the op theatre under GA. He will get on with treating you like any other patient. Just like any sportsperson has to forget everything and focus on the task at hand.

    Some doctors don't quite grasp the concept of pain which is ironic! But hold on to the fact that he did give you appropriate pain meds which tells me that he did listen to you even if it appeared the opposite was the case.

    Some of the nurses can be a bit brusque which seems to jar more when you're feeling a bit delicate. It wouldn't hurt to send a card to the staff to apologise saying perhaps you over-reacted a bit and be the peacemaker. Explain briefly that you are on meds that cloud your judgement. Sometimes you don't need to win every battle or cling to every principle. Just make sure you win the war on endo!

    ...sorry...I just noticed you said you were discharged with ....OESTROGEN! Are you sure that shouldn't read progesterone? Oestrogen will make your endo worse. It loves oestrogen.

    Also, if he is a general gynae and endo is found you can try to get refereed to an endo specialist which would be more appropriate.

  • I'm not appologising. She was horrible. She's lucky I'm not making a formal complaint!!! She was so un professional.

    Yep estrogen is definitely what iv got.

    Although he has given me pain meds, they dont work on me. And he knew that before discharging and told me to see the pain team.... But didn't refer me!!

    Why did he contradict himself and say the complete opposit to what he told me before?

  • I'm really sorry the nurse was horrible to you. Once when I was coming round from surgery I was sick and in a lot of pain and a nurse went to give me an injection in the bum and I didn't want it, I just want to come round once it's done and she went mental at me. Told me how dare I question her and wouldn't say what it was and was shoving it in my face when I couldn't see clearly yet. It's difficult to be patient in these situations so when you are and then they are rude it's so frustrating. I think all endo sufferers are wary of the medical profession anyway so when someone is horrible it really undermines your trust when you are really relying on them. I would go ahead with surgery as others have said they can't show bias in surgery, they'd open themselves up to serious lawsuits, if you don't trust them, trust that. Once they open you up they will see exactly what's going on, not guessing. And they will help you. Can't believe they've given you oestrogen?! I only had raspberry leaf tea and I was in agony, oestrogen must seriously hurt. You will have a chance to talk to the surgeon before, just be really nice then. Best wishes to you xxx

  • Have you had diclofenac? I find it makes pain more bearable.

  • I love it for pain relief - but the medics are now switching ladies on to Naproxen in the UK as it is a safer drug. I still prefer the diclofenac tho.

  • I started naproxen on Monday. Had to stop because it made me feel like I was going to have a heart attack!! And didn't help the pain is been given it for so no point in taking it x x

  • You can buy naproxen over the counter! It's rubbish! It's called feminax ultra or something.

  • I was given it for pain in my legs..... Made my heart race at 122bpm and 134 bpm..... Felt like I was going to have a panic attack or something but for no reason!!! Was just watching tv, no reason to be scared!!! It made me feel Crap and my legs still hurt x x

  • If you don't feel you can apologise when the fault was on the other side, I do understand. Sometimes it can help iron things out and improve relations a bit and you get to feel like the bigger person. I often pity people who are horrible and realise they mustn't be happy people. At least you don't have to be near her forever!

    On the subject of oestrogen, that seems rather odd to me. Maybe there's a good reason I'm unaware of. Try checking with your doctor...get your Mum to ring!

    Anybody out there know about taking oestrogen 2 weeks prior to lap for possible endo?

  • She was the nurse from the pain team, she was horrible!! It wasn't even me that asked for her to come see me and all she did was tell me off for being in pain. She had a go at me for having allergic reactions to different pain relife and told me off for still being in pain after starting the morphine pill :-( I didn't mean to still be hurting. And my allergic reactions are big reactions not just intolerances :-( one pain killer even causes me to be unconscious but I can still hear everything. I can't wake up or fall asleep. I just exist. That's terrifying!!! Especially as it doesn't even help the pain so I'm stuck in a body in pain but I can't even adjust my position! And she told me off for that!!! I put in a complaint about it with PALS and the ward sister and next thing I know EVERYONE is telling me off because I'm ungreatful for her advice?!?! She didn't advise me anything she just told me there is nothing they can do for me.

    Yea diclofenic pills don't work on me and the suppository did work but it left me with serious blisters and swelling up my bum :-( x x

  • My GP says it makes no sense to be taking these pills but said I should carry on if the consultant says so. The consultant isn't answering mine or my mums calls. We are posting a letter this evening because my GP said he has a legal responsibility to reply to a letter. I tried to apologise to the staff on the ward for getting so upset about it but they wouldn't take it saying I was wrong for going to PALS about a member of staff?? Surely that's the point?? X x

  • I get it 100% when I was in hospital I had a nurse that did her round as she started the night shift and she was so busy texting she forgot to turn my iv drip on with tramadol and didn't even give two girls any pain meds before bedtime. She wondered why we were all hitting our buttons an hour later. I was crying I was in so much pain. Everytime I go into hospital there is always one nurse that isn't supportive or thinks you shouldn't be in pain. I just smile & wait for the next shift change. It's so hard.

  • I tried waiting for shift change.... Such a shame they hand over their personal feelings during handover and not just the facts :-(

    There was a night nurse who tried so hard to help me but she was fighting a loosing battle. She tried getting me help when I reacted to something that bad my eyes swelled shut but the dr said it wasn't important. Maybe not for him but I was stuck in a single room with no TV and I couldn't read because of my eyes and it was the poor nurse that was having to help me with simple things like going to the toilet. What a waste of her time and my time!! I wasn't even given a diagnosis when they discharged me. I went in for pains in my kidneys so why was I under a gynae dr?? I never said I had gynae pain :-( x x

  • Hi I don't think you should apologise. They should apologise to you.....after all they are there to serve us whilst we are vulnerable and in need. Not be sharp, arrogant and rude. You always do seem to get one thats out of order on a shift. I think you are in your right to complain. The rude ones need a kick up the bac.s.de and no one seems to want to confront them as they continue to act like this. I complained about my gynea once as he spoke to me like a lil kid patronising me. Next time I seen him and since he has been ok and I know the message got back to him and why shouldn't I complain if I feel the need. If there wasn't the need we wouldn't complain why should these people with bad attitudes towards us in high responsible jobs get away with it when they are getting paid to help us. Don't forget who pays their wage.... You have done the right thing. X

  • O forgot to say why the he.l has he prescribed oestrogen??? Is he taking the p1.s do you think x

  • I think he might be. So far I haven't had any endo like pain since I started prostap but iv had awful side effects that have resulted in me calling 999 a few times. This is why he's put me on it? X

  • I kind of agree with the above, but maybe keep quiet until after your op. I'm also thinking if he prescribed wrong meds I would be slightly concerned about him operating on me, does he actually know what he is looking for ???

    Some staff at hospitals are fantastic but then some nurses, you wonder why they bothered to do all the training when their bedside manor is crap.no care what so ever !!!.

    If your in no rush for op, consider moving gp and starting all over again, but you know this will take forever xx

  • Although he isn't a specialist he is meant to be pretty good. The first time I met him I had glandular fever so I was in agony when he examined me and he said I was over reacting. Yea I didn't know it was glandular fever until that night when I collapsed but he was still a dick. So instantly I didn't like him. But then I saw him when I got admitted a few weeks ago and he was just horrible. When he mentioned the amount of unnecessary pain I was in before I told him it was because I had GF and he just said don't lie. I don't trust him at all, but I need this op. I need them to fix something even just for a little bit or I'm going to loose my job :-( x x

  • Don't let him operate on you if you don't trust him. Cancel the op and get referred somewhere else.

    As for nurses, I'm not surprised at all. I encountered a number of

    nurses when I worked on the wards, who had the compassion and caring capabilities of a plank of dead wood!

    You have no reason to apologise.... It's your health that these rude incompetent people are dealing with! Do not take any chances. Make sure you are referred to a hospital that treat you how you deserve and not just a patient number.


  • The nurses on the ward were lovely until I fell out with the pain nurse and then they became grumpy un caring monsters. The HCW shoved the thermometer in my ear that hard my ear bruised and swelled up and she told me off for flinching. I'm a HCW myself and the type of patients I work with would of punched her for it. Serious attitude problem!! It was that bad the night nurse got a dr to look at my ear, just made the HCW develop an even worse attitude then the day before!!!

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