Feeling fobbed off after 1st gyne appointment

Well after waiting three months to see a gynecologist, I finally had my appointment today and have left feeling very upset and frustrated. All he did was take swabs (which i had done 2 months ago at the docs) and tell me to take my pill for three months back to back, he said if that didnt work he wanted me to try the coil (which ive never been keen on). Basically he told me he would write to me in four months. Because nothing showed on my ultrasound and because of my age (21) he doesn't know what it could be as many of my symptoms are bowel and back related which apparently he cant deal with.

I feel totally fobbed off, I cant cope another four months of being this tired and achey! :( What happens if the symptoms dont improve? Do i go back to the doctor? Soo upset right now :(

Anyone else feel like this/ experienced this? xxx

22 Replies

  • Really sorry to hear this. My advice is call your GP and tell them how you were treated hopefully they will be supportive if not speak to another GP. Ask for a referral for a second opinion, you are entitled to this as a min. Good luck, don't lose faith.

  • Thank you i'll see if they will refer me to another gyne. Just had so much hope today that things would finally start to be on the up after two years of docs etc waiting to finally be sent to a gyne and now they were useless and no help at all :( xxx

  • So sorry to hear about your bad experience :( I know how it feels to be fobed off. I waited nearly 6 years to be sent to see a gyne and he too did swabs after my Gp had already done several over the years! He basically sent me away with a diagnosis of IBS.I have all the symptoms of endo he did at the end of the appointment say it cld possibly be a little endo! When I left I was very upset so I asked my Gp to refer me for a second opinion which he did. So I am now waiting to see another gyne next month. So hopefully your Gp will refer you for a second opinion. Best of luck with it I hope you get answers soon xxx

  • Goodluck for you too :)

    Just feeling very deflated right now :( I dont want to mess with my contraception, if this is something that could interfere with my fertility I want to know now, not in 4/5 years time when I cant concieve, putting me on the coil or taking the pill for three months at a time is just covering up the symptoms not finding out why they are there...Im frustrated because they dont seem to say that they are lookin for the cause, they jus seem to want to cover the symptoms :/ xxxx

  • Please GET A SECOND OPINION. Sorry for the raised caps but I was 22 when I first saw my first gyne and she told me to do exactly what you have been told to do. I stupidly didn't follow my gut instinct in getting a second opinion and I just did what I was told. I am now 41, childless, had every medication treatment and surgeries under the sun and now been told this week that all the damage caused has resulted in me now being scheduled for total hysterectomy, cervix removal and part bowel/part vagina removal just before Christmas this year. This all could have been avoided if I had gone for a second opinion. xx

  • Thanks Fordie I will definately be askin for a second opinion :) xx Sorry to hear u have had such a rough time xx

  • That's good to hear. I'm sorry if I have frightened you with all that I have gone through. I just don't want anybody else to have a ruined life like I have had. I do hope you get seen to quickly xx

  • No No you havent scared me, youve given me a reason to go back to the docs and nt sit here wondering if its worth it. You start to feel disheartened when they dont believe u and makes you wanna give up, as im sure most women on here know, so hearing your story gives me the push i need not to suffer in silence. xx

  • If you need any advice or you just want to chat, I'm here for you xx

  • Thank you x

  • I totally agree you are young and have many years ahead so it's only right that you get answers now. I don't blame you for not want to try to many pills or the coil because as you say in the future you may want children. Ask your Gp about all of this before you decide whether to try anything. I know what you mean about felling deflated I felt the same after my gyne appointment but after finding this site and reading everything the other ladies had been saying it gave me confidence to go back and get answers! Well done you for not giving in stay strong and determined and I'm sure you will get your answers. And thank you xxx

  • Hi hun your situation sounds a lot like mine. I'm 22 and i've recently been diagnosed with Endometriosis after 8 months of bad abdo, pelvic, back pain every single day.. awful periods.. painful bowel movements.. painful urination. The docs I saw kept trying to fob me off as I had a normal ultrasound and they tried to treat me for PID twice after negative internal swabs and my first gynae consultant told me he didn't know what the pain was.. that he wouldn't do a laporoscopy as he didn't think it was endo and sent me home to take paracetomol as it was musculoskeletal pain. ?? I know how upsetting and frustrating it is and i've had lots of time off work due to the pain which adds stress into the equation too. My advice to you is keep on at the doctors.. go to a walk in centre or your doctor every time you have bad pain... make sure you annoy them.. don't take no for an answer.. don't be fobbed off waiting months for different things. Also ask to change your consultant as he sounds pants like.my first one and if all else fails and no one will listen go to PALS patient and liason services. . Its a shame but it seems that when you have a moan they start to listen. Pain is a way of your body telling you something is going on so you need to know what's happening xx

  • Hello, I'm sorry to hear what you've been going through. The exact same pattern has happened to me. I'm 20 and have been fobbed off by everyone and still am no closer to getting any form of diagnosis. I know how you feel as doctors always use the line "because of your age" on me too and it's so frustrating!! Our age might mean that certain things are less common but it doesn't mean that they should disregard us. If you ever want a chat/someone to rant to, feel free to message me as it seems as though we're going through the exact same thing at the moment xx

  • Hi Nette thanks for replying :)

    Sounds like things for you are pretty similar to me. Fingers crossed things will soon start to progress.

    Feel free to write to me too if you ever need to :) xxx

  • Hey,

    Really sorry to hear you had a bad first experience! I had my first appointment on Tuesday and mine went rather well. Not sure if it will be because of your age, as I'm 22. There will definitely be better consultants than others, which is a shame, but there isn't much we can do. Maybe go back to your GP and ask for another referral, this time choose a different hospital if you don't mind travelling a little bit further?! I was offered to take the coil, and he says after my ultrasounds then we will have a chat about it, but i don't think i want to go down that route.

    Also he should've told you that an ultrasound isn't a definitive way of looking for Endo.. it doesn't always show up. The only true way of seeing this is by having a Laproscopy.

    Maybe go back to your GP and explain the situation and how your feeling?

    Could you also have forgotten any of your symptoms? I took a diary with me of when all of my symptoms occurred, and a little notebook to ensure i made him aware of just how bad the pain was.

    If your GP reffered you then at least you know that they think its serious enough for you to see someone, so i would go back and arrange your appointment again at another hospital.

    Im really sorry you've had a crappy time though, theres nothing worse than thinking its all in your head, and he certainly won't have helped!

    Let me know if you need to talk though, and please please push forward with this, don't just stay in agony! xxxx

  • Hey, i'm glad your appointment went well and that you are progressing forward! Goodluck!

    I took a list of my symptoms and a diary that ive kept over the past five months, and I read through those when he asked me my history, so I didnt forget any symptoms.

    I dont understand why he hasnt referred me onto other specialists if he believes that my problem could be bowel or back related :/ Just feel like its going to be a long four months.

    Thanks for your reply xxx

  • Yer thats really strange that he hasn't followed this up with anything else, especially as you've already had the ultrasounds etc! It will definitely be a long 4 months... thats just not on really!!

    I'd book in with your GP and explain that your still really struggling pain wise and with your other symptoms, and see what he/she can do about it for you.

    Other than that theres not much i can say :( Just wish they would help you out more than that... its irritating they just don't take this seriously!!

    Fingers crossed for you hun!


  • Hi, I totally sympathise with you, I am on my third referral now as have been seen and discharged by 2 gynaes telling me its not a gynae problem! I am in a better position than most a I have had my children and my problems started after that. All I can say is keep pushing and pushing, you know your own body and you must keep telling them that, eventually you WILL find someone who is sympathetic to your cause and you will get help. I am really hoping I have found the right consultant this time, supposedly a specialist in endo BUT it has taken me over 6 years and 3 referrals and many many horrible appointments like yours being fobbed off....don't lose heart xxxxx

  • I was first referred to a gynaecologist in 1993 because of my constant pelvic aches and pains and heavy periods. I already had a 3 year old daughter by then. The doctor said she couldn't find anything wrong from examining me internally and to go away and see if I could get pregnant with a much wanted 2nd baby. If I couldn't get pregnant I should go back to see her. I had my 2nd baby in 1994. Over the next few years my contraceptive pill alleviated some of the symptoms but my periods were still quite heavy every month. I thought it was just me and so learnt to put up with it. How, looking back, I do not know! In 2001 I had a 3rd baby and was unable to go back on the pill because of headaches. My symptoms came back with a vengeance!!!! For the next 10 years I was taking Tranexamic Acid tablets for heavy periods but still felt really crap and tired and achy all the time. Two years ago I had had enough and went to a new GP with my symptoms (I was also severely anaemic) and started having a lot of different tests (bloods, scans etc....) at the hospital and was told I did not have Endo and was advised to have an endometrial ablation op (because by then I was in my late 40's and finished having babies). I had the op but although periods became lighter I still had the pain and then an internal scan showed a shadow on one of my ovaries! Went in for a laparoscopy and was found to have stage 4 Endo which I am told I probably also had back in 1993!!!!! My advice is KEEP PUSHING AND ASK FOR A LAPAROSCOPY IF YOU CAN! Don't be fobbed off like I was. They CAN find out more now than they could in 1993. Good luck! Bokkie XXXXX

  • I am 23 and in exactly the same position as you. I have been to several different consultants eventually got the op as they thought it was endo to the be told everything's fine and sometimes you just have pain for no reason. It makes me so angry. I have had another appointment today to be told it's probably IBS so there's nothing they can do. It is effecting my life so much. I burst into tears in my last appointment because I just feel so lost. There must be something because it seems so many people are suffering with very similar symptoms and yet have no reason for it!? Keep going keep pushing only you know your body and know when something's not right. Have a look at endometriosis uk they are very good at giving support and they also do meetings. X

  • The thing which amazes me is that I can type my symptoms into google and it automatically suggests endo. Why don't doctors? :/ Today has been another day of painful back ache, ovary ache, fatigue, and frequent urination. There seem to be more symptoms every week :( So fed up. Going to make a docs appointment next week to see if I can get some sense out of someone. Going to try and see a female gp as, as of yet I have only seen males :/

    THANK YOU EVERYONE for sharing your stories and words of wisdom / encouragmenet, I wont let this beat me! xxx

  • Heya hun am 21 aswell ive been unwell since I was 16 and I have only just been diagnosed with endometriosis took years for them to listen to me I kept getting told it wasn't gyane problem until my gp had enough and sent me to a different gyane and first thing witch came out of her mouth was endometriosis then did a Laparoscopy and diagnosed me I hope you get sorted soon xx

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