Not alone

I used to think I was the only one that suffered with this awful illness. The feelings of isolation, despair & chronic fatigue are at times unbearable. Since joining this website I have been reading other peoples problems and realising that I am not alone with this awful iillness. Apparently some of the greatest minds in history suffered with mental health issues, Winston Churchill, Vincent Van Gough are among many. We are usually very thoughtful, caring & creative people. I don't want to be like Van Gough by cutting my ear off & shooting myself in a cornfield. My glasses would fall off if I cut one of my ears off & I would be even more depressed, if I could not see. I think shooting myself would hurt to much & be very messy. So my only option is to follow Churchill (Winston not the dog on TV) & fight depression in the fields, streets & on the beaches. I think depression is a war that I will be battling for the rest of my life. Sorry for waffling, the drugs must be kicking in.

11 Replies

  • You are definately not alone. I have suffered with this too for years and have good and bad days. When you mentioned Churchill the dog, I thought you meant Winston Churchills black dog. That was the name he gave to his deppression. He lived with his dog for years like we do and he learned how to train it like we must try to. There is a good book called Black Dog which I recommend. It looks like a childs picture book but it is not a childs book. It is about how we live with this dog every day and it never goes away but somedays it is very quiet other days it is noisy.

    We must take life one day at a time.

  • You are not alone! I suffer with the same fatigue too... it is so draining! :( Especially when you have uni work to do and right now I am trying to revise for my summer exams.

    By the way I love your user name! :)

  • Hippocampus as you probaly know is part of the brain that stores memories & form constructive thinking. I thought it was funny as I have the memory of a goldfish & find it very hard to think of anything constructive. I believe it is also greek or latin for a Seahorse. Being mad on wildlife photography, I thought it was the perfect user name. Good luck with your exams.

  • Hi Hippocampus

    I too am chronically fatuiged but that also comes with my Fibro. I've suffered 20 yrs & it sure does'nt seem to get any easier.

    I've heard about famous people like Winston Churchill & knew he referred to it as his black dog. I must go onto Amazon to have a look & see if I can download the book.

    Luv & hugs sent your way.

    Jackie xx

  • Your sense of humour is intact and that will help you get through. I think we do wage a war against depression/anxiety and have minor skirmishes some days and bigger battles on others. But we get through it which makes us stronger and better and able to sympathise and support others with illness of any kind. Good luck with your 'black dog' .Now I must look for that book.

  • I sent you a PM

    Jackie xx

  • hehehe you made me laugh- my face almost crumbled-havent use those muscles in a while- so thanks xxxx hugs xx

  • I have been away for the weekend & I feel very tired, I slept in until noon as the exersion has caught up with me. I find getting out of the house harder & harder these days. But you cheered me up this morning because I made you laugh.

  • Hey Hippocampus

    Keep that sense of humor up :) I read this on a monday morning and it made me smile, thanks for a great start to the week.

    check out this site might just help you though the rest of the week :)

  • I am research assistant for the NeuroScience dept at my uni, which is apt also as I forget within a second haha! Thank you! Keep smiling! :D

  • Hi Hippocampus,

    Just to let you know you cheered me right up!! Problem is we're just too brilliant, something's got to give :))

    Seriously though, thank you, nice to hear someone else on my wavelength!!