Getting started when you're depressed

Hi there. I'm looking for some advice or experiences is perhaps more accurate. I'm 28 years old and my life feels like a constant start and stop. I'd hit a point where I had an opportunity to advance my career with a big move and new challenges. I lasted a year and a half which is my constant stop point. Back to square one.

All i've managed to get is a basic retail job 8 hour contract. I struggle with depression and I'm finding it really hard to get motivated to even look for other jobs/ opportunities.

I know trying fitness could help, trying productive online courses, even blogging with all the skills I leaned (my background is art and training) but I have zero inclination. I feel exhausted all the time and plain sad and miserable. I manage tidying when i'm not at the part time job and thats it.

How do people find the energy to get out of bed, to work out, walk, be creative, find better opportunities, basically do all the things that will 100% help, when you're depressed?

Any thoughts, shared experiences?

9 Replies

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  • Ehy there stressbot, Sigh...I am 28 years old too, I am suffering with GAD +Depression. I got the same feelings with you, all actually. My anxiety is in full swing now, everytime I try to get up for work every morning, I really wanna cry, I'm not even have the wants to eat. I wanna take my life, but I know it is so wrong. What I usually do now is really force myself to get-up even if I feel like crying, even if I am afraid about my anxiety at the office, about what will happen. I just try to get-up and work, than stay at home and feel my depression and anxiety in full swing, which made me more paranoid and crazy. Sigh...we can do this! You are not alone buddy. Hope you'll feel alright. BTW, I am 28 as well.

  • Thank you for replying. God knows there is loads of us out there. It's a wonder there are so many that still dont get it or even acknowledge mental health. I keep crying over absolutely nothing. At times in front of people and I have to control it.I'm the same with work i just go because I have to and in some ways it gives me energy I just wish it was more routine.

  • Hi stressbot, Getting out of be has always been my problem much caused by only 3-4 hrs sleep @ a time. Job wise I get call in to different depts/sections to "troubleshoot" when things go wrong. So when things go right the "get up & go" will have "got up & went"! Does your Training aspect always involve up close & personal work or can some be done from home ie, writing training modules, etc. That way you can take things @ your own pace toward your own goal?

  • It feels so long ago. I wrote a training program around art products in my old role and i fear i've already forgotten so much. I thought I could perhaps try and tap into that knowledge I had and make little how to videos online. As I said though finding the will to sit down and work on something like that just doesn't exist. I do feel like my sporadic shifts affect this as I'm never quite sure what time I have but even when I have days off I focus on not staying in bed too long, I either sleep for a few hours a night or oversleep, then I tidy and before I know it its dark out. I almost feel I need forced or have to answer to someones expectations almost to get things done. Maybe not a healthy outlook.

  • Hi Stressbot; Is there much scope to work from home in your area? (Geography & work). More & more companies in Ireland are adapting folks computers so they can work totally from home. If your contracted to a 40 hr week you can do this using total flexi-time ie; Doesn't matter when you put the hrs in as long as they add up to your contracted time. So if, like me, you're awake @ 2 am you can sit in front of your laptop & prattle away!! Any ov time can be taken in pay or time off in lieu. Taking time can add up to some 3 days a week! + the companies save a bomb in heating & lighting, ground rent, subsistence, etc.

  • Hi Stressbot,

    A trick I use is to do exactly the opposite of what you feel like doing or think you should do. The hard part is to trigger the behavior so I wear a rubber band on my wrist, flick it and then go into motion. Weird, but it works for me.

    The doing is part of reasonable new therapy called ACT which is different to CBT. You really do benefit from some talk therapy.

    If your exhaustion is a symptom of depression (not better explained by a physical condition) your doctor can choose from a couple different prescription meds to enhance your energy.

    A doctor's visit would be my first point of call. Since you have moved to a new place, the doc would be aware of support in the local area. Book a long appointment and take along a few notes to get the most of your visit.

    Mental health is never smooth sailing but if you someone in your crew (doctor & therapist), life is definitely easier.

    All the best

  • I'll give that a try. I used to pull my hair and ended up with bald patches so I started wearing a band to stop myself and it did work. Might need to try your technique.

    I'm a big believer in talking about it but i'm struggling to find a counsellor that works just now. Plus someone I can afford. I hated going through doctors as cbt never worked for me and there would be 3 week waits. Also filling in those forms gauging your depression and likeness to self harm were so insulting.

    I'm always weary of meds. I was on various ones all high doses for years and I became either numb or erratic.

    Well I've moved back home. London was awful for getting help and support. I had a doctor tell me to pull myself together when I started crying in desperation for some help. I will say your advice is sound, i'd say the same thing I just need to do it.

    Thank you so much for your reply.

  • Hi

    I am 27 and unemployed. I cannot motivate to look for work most of the time. It is always disappointing for me and never works out. I struggle to take care of myself now. I eat erratically/unhealthily, go to bed late .I have worked full time and part time in the past. It has never worked out for me( I was attacked in one job I did).

    I've got a degree, but am looking at either min wage jobs with bad hours or training in something else. With depression it is overwhelming. I want to be out of my rut but I don't know where to start. My degree adds shame to the equation as others I know were able to get a good job with theirs, not me though.They think I am lazy/ useless as do many older adults. I get slated for being unemployed.

    I am really jealous of people who work ( even though most people hate work).

    Anyway, you are not alone! I am hoping a job will come up for me and you. Something usually does. I am looking.

    Good luck!

  • Volunteering is a good way to get back your work confidence. You are not under the same pressure, get back into the routine if work and they can write you a reference. I'm not sure what thee is around you but charities are always looking for staff, or going int schools /care homes to help, charity shops often need people to help with both the sales but also marketing and websites etc. I don't know what you skills are or what your degree was in but I guess it's just finding something that you are interested in. I am lucky I love my job that I have now and it really helps me feel better because I am around people and feel like I have a purpose. I really hope you manage to find something that you enjoy.

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