Double Aaaaargh!

Was going to have a miserable rant about how I was totally misunderstood in last night's Counselling class but have actually bored myself silly trying to think what I wanted to say. My own eyes glazed over so have decided to crochet a scarf instead. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Hope you are all having better days.

Snowdrops in the park lifted my spirits.



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21 Replies

  • Amanda why don,t you write down what you want to say next time, you might find it easier. Totally agree with you regarding snowdrops, nature lifts our spirits thats why I walk in a park as much as possible, fresh air is medicine without a prescription and no side effects :D

  • Thanks for your reply. Yes, you're probably right about saying what you want to say - but that's what caused me problems in the first place! Have taken 2 walks today as the sun was shining so did feel better.x

  • It's why I don't think that people suffering with anxiety or depression should train as counsellors. It's hard to seperate your own issues from those you are being trained to understand x

  • Hi Lucy

    Surely that is a skill that can be learned though?? What about the benefit of being able to empathise with the person receiving the counselling and the very caring nature that is so evident on this site. In my opinion these are both very good reasons for those that have suffered from anxiety & depression to train as counsellors.

    You may be aware that there is a great body of research that says Peer support is incredibly helpful to those with mental illness. In my local area the NHS funded wellbeing service has recruited a number of Peer support workers to help those with long standing mental health problems. Personally, I find a real benefit in helping others and I look forward greatly to the monthly support meeting I attend as I know I will get comments & advice from people who really know what they are talking about.

    Just my personal thoughts on this matter.

    Take care


  • Excellent reply Pete x

  • You completely miss the point here Lucy but then you're not planning to be a counsellor. x

  • I agree with the above. I think if people have been able to resolve their issues and have "moved through" the anxiety and depression then they can offer good insight. It is only when people have not resolved their own issues there is a problem.

    I guess "currently suffering from anxiety and depression", yes I would have an issue with a counsellor in this situation (and I have known some); but having suffered and gained insight is a different thing. Best not to attempt it too early and it isn't for everyone.

    Gemma X

  • Thanks Gemma x

  • I agree. My daughter has tried twice to complete a psychology course and failed, due to the unresolved emotions being brought up within a class environment. She also suffers from Anxiety and depression. However she resists offers from me to get her counseling. She is not ready to confront these issues, but the colleges she has attended cannot accept this. When discussing her options (she wanted to do Biology and Chemistry) they refused and insisted she do psychology or sociology. As a result she has done neither. I think she should concentrate on getting some other qualifications until ready to deal with this, or get a job and go back to it later. What do you think?

  • I think the above comments are all valid and recognise that I need to discuss any issues I have with my class who are my peer support group rather than on this kind of forum. I'm only training and as in actual counselling sessions, things are raised which are challenging. It's the outcome which proves the strength of the counsellor or the success of the counselling. I'm certainly not ready to sit with a client and be able to be ethically competent to be in that position. I'm horrified by the number of so-called 'counsellors' with no proper training who are out there doing untold damage. My ability to complete my training will be closely assessed by professionals who are very aware that mental health is a sliding scale and from moment to moment we all move around from the 'good mental health' to 'poor mental health', It's being in the 'poor mental health' area for sustained periods when professional help and even possible hospitalisation are the only way forward. To look on bouts of depression as a reason not to continue training would probably be undervaluing myself and the worthwhile contribution my own experiences will have on me as a counsellor - which won't be for another couple of years. Thanks especially to Pete for your informed response :-)

  • Whether or not this is the right place for your issues, thank you for being open about them. It is a help to me to read about your experiences, and might help me guide my daughter better.

  • I think the fact your daughter doesn't feel ready for counselling is the biggest indicator that she has problems she is unwilling to look at. Counselling is an equal relationship in which both counsellor and client commit to the work needed in equal measure. Your daughter's college seem to have little understanding of the pressures young adults are under which is regrettable as they are in the best position to be able to help.

    I will probably not continue with this site as the general consensus is that counsellors are 'sorted' individuals who don't have difficulties within their own lives that they can't address without it becoming an influence on their ability to act professionally with clients. A common but complete misnomer and understandable if you don't understand what it takes to become a counsellor which is obvious from the comments. Very good luck to you and your daughter. She is in good hands with someone as supportive as you for her mother. x

  • Oh please don't allow these people to put you off. My friend who was training to be a counselor would be the first to disagree. She went through three years of training whilst undergoing regular counseling sessions of her own to explore all her own issues. It was not an option, but mandatory part of the course. She discovered all sorts of things about herself as a result, a lot relating to her parents divorce. She never went on to be a counselor but makes a great friend to call on, and may well continue with her career after getting more life experience (nothing quite beats that does it).

  • Thanks for that. I fully intend to continue with my studies as I know I will eventually achieve what I've set out to do - I'm old enough to see that I actually have some value in this world despite problems with depression and anxiety which vary in degree and frequency. What you have written about your friend's training is completely accurate - ongoing therapy and supervision as support is an essential part of becoming and continuing with practicing as a counsellor. Counsellors remain human after all and if they weren't affected by what life throws at them and their clients they would become unfeeling automatons. Cheers to you for your understanding x

  • I feel quite upset that you said you may leave . I also felt in your first post that you were just been a bit "light" and offloading rather than wanting us all to discuss the ins and out? So it must have come as quite a shock to you to get such STRONG comments? ( I know it would've me) Hope you ok and please stay !

    Gemma :) X

  • Hi Gemma - Thank you for your concern. I think a first post is fraught with danger - do I talk about everything? , do I just hint at problems?, do I just say 'hello' and see where it leads? Is it a safe environment? I really don't mind strong comments - just not sure I should be talking about my training if it gives people the wrong impression of counselling and possibly puts them off getting help. I'm actually ok about it - just don't think others are ok with it and feel somehow I'm intruding on a club where I'm coming from mental health from the other side of the picture. I didn't mean for that to be the case - thought we could support each other but maybe I was a bit naïve. I appreciate your concern very much Gemma. xx

  • Good morning Amanda.

    I am really concerned & upset that you do not feel totally welcome on this Forum. I have been a member for just over a month now and have had nothing but sound advice & support from many members. Your comments have really struck a chord with me as I have expressed an interest in possibly commencing training as a counsellor. All I would say is give the Forum another chance. I for one would really miss your posts & advice.

    Take care


  • Hi Pete, It's ok - and it's not that I don't feel welcome, it's that I wondered if this was the right place for my issues and whether or not it would be helpful to others. I'll keep an eye on what's being posted and if I feel what I have to say is relevant I'll continue posting. Thank you so much for your kind words and I'd like you to know I would be happy to discuss your possible training whenever you need to know anything about it. x

  • Hi Amanda

    I totally understand your concerns and am confident that you will be able to add helpful advice to many on this forum going forward. Thank you for your very kind offer. The counselling training is definitely something that I want to take further and intend to start the next Intro to Counselling course in April. I'll let you know how things progress for me and would be interested to hear how your studies develop.

    Take care


  • Please never feel you are intruding. I would hate to have a narrow forum where just a few people agree completely on everything and I guess the idea of someone not feeling welcome does upset me.

    You will find a lot of support on here.

    Yes of course sometimes people are not well themselves and can get irritable or they have had experiences which give them certain views of things but overall we ARE a very supportive and caring community on here.

    Hope you are doing ok today.


  • Hi and thank you for your kindness. I guess I felt I was treading on a few toes and didn't want to give anyone the wrong idea about what I'm doing. I hope I can be helpful to people here as well as get my own support - as has been mostly evident from the posts. Yes, we all have bad days and I do understand it's good to be able to be grumpy, sad and depressed somewhere it will be safe to offload. I've had an ok day - thank you. I hope you're feeling ok today too. xx

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