If you're not going to say something nice to m... - Couch to 5K

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If you're not going to say something nice to me, please shut the #*@% up.

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate
41 Replies

Hi everyone! Since I started this running malarkey I have lost 10 kilos. All the fat on my derrière has magically transformed itself into muscle and I think that I now look really good in skinny jeans (even if I say so myself). So why, oh why, did a colleague take it upon herself to warn me about the effects of losing weight at my age?

She told me that if I were to lose another ounce I would end up looking gaunt.

Now, I did not ask her for an opinion. And I am hardly anorexic. Ladies, I am a DD bra size (tmi?) and a size 10/12 elesewhere. That is hardly skinny is it?

But I must admit, she has got me worried...

Seriously, I feel great and have only cut down on sugar. Which is what I said, when my "friend" nodded knowlingly and said "ahah, Dukan, eh?"

I was bought up to comment on people's appearance only if I was to say something positive and nice.

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DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItaly
Graduate
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41 Replies
BigEd profile image
BigEd

Hi Delia if you are happy with your shape then it doesnt matter what anyone

else thinks. She should keep her opinion to herself.

DD and a size 10? You must look incredibly good!

Mitts profile image
MittsGraduate

She's probably just jealous. Some people can't seem to help themselves making negative remarks. Ignore her and enjoy your fitness!

psarapsych profile image
psarapsychGraduate in reply to Mitts

Dearest D.... Now take it from me and Mitts.... The lady is jealous and doesn't want you to look even better. You are a mirror for her own laziness and failure on the fit and fat front. She may not even be fat but for some reason, while you weren't in the best of shape, she had someone to feel more superior to and now you've taken her security blanket away - good for you and for heaven's sake ENJOY THE WAY YOU FEEL. You are NOT anorexic D... That is a very serious and sad psychological disorder - it's not just about being thin. You can have fat anorexics you know....

Hugs and congratulations on your sexy derriere, Sara :-) xxx

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to psarapsych

Hi Five Sara!

psarapsych profile image
psarapsychGraduate in reply to DeliaItaly

And to you sexy DD :-) - be proud and let the misery guts form their own club!

Slater profile image
SlaterGraduate in reply to psarapsych

(in the spirit of Facebook) - LIKE!

I agree with everything everyone above has said. You should feel proud!

AuntieAli profile image
AuntieAliGraduate

bloody ignore her delia!!

with those stats - bet you look great! ( tmi info never in this community :-) )

you're doing something positive for yourself, your body and your future. i agree with Mitts, she's only jealous. you're fit and healthy.

gaunt my arse!!!

ali x

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to AuntieAli

You guys are fantastic, you really are! THANKS!

BigEd profile image
BigEd in reply to AuntieAli

Ditto, DD is excellent ;-)

SBG356 profile image
SBG356Graduate

A typical jealous remark from people trying to sabotage your good efforts. I have had the same said to me before but just ignore them. I feel and look good and that's what matters. So do you Delia and I'm with you on the skinny jeans - I am proud to wear them and now only get positive comments. I even got chatted up at the bus stop by someone young enough to be my son - made my day!!! LOL Be proud Delia and yes they can certainly shut the %#*@ up!!

Sue

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to SBG356

Thanks Sue! In fact, she was jabbering away about how I would get wrinkles soon and my associate simply said that she should think about HER OWN wrinkles!

Burstcouch profile image
BurstcouchGraduate

I used to get a lot of comments like that when I lost 49 lbs in weight over 6 months. People comments included, you look ill, ...........your too skinny........... we are worrried about you. However I was at that time within the normal range for my height.

That was 12 years ago. I put most of it back on over this time. But I have noticed now my shape has changed. I have a BUTT!! Never had one before.

So Delia be proud and happy with who you are not what other people think and say.

ps I have 5 pairs of skinny jeans right now !

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to Burstcouch

Good on you Burstcouch! Thanks for the support :-)

mark909 profile image
mark909Graduate

hah jealous much? Tell her to suck it up

swanscot profile image
swanscotGraduate

What a check of the woman! It sounds like jealousy to me too.

sfb350 profile image
sfb350Graduate

She sounds rather jealous to me. Ignore her. She's probably wanting to justify filling her own wrinkles with CAKE and PIES !!

As you say, if she can't say anything nice she should shut the f*** up !! I've known people like that - they pretend they're being caring but the reality is that they're just jealous and perhaps even a bit spiteful.

Rise above it, you're fit and healthy and you've worked hard to get there - don't let someone like that get you down.

sfb350 profile image
sfb350Graduate

She sounds rather jealous to me. Ignore her. She's probably wanting to justify filling her own wrinkles with CAKE and PIES !!

As you say, if she can't say anything nice she should shut the f*** up !! I've known people like that - they pretend they're being caring but the reality is that they're just jealous and perhaps even a bit spiteful.

Rise above it, you're fit and healthy and you've worked hard to get there - don't let someone like that get you down.

notbad profile image
notbadGraduate

Ignore the nay sayers is what I say. :-) I'm sure you're looking good with those vital statistics but most important of all how do you feel? If you're fit on the inside it tends to show on the outside.

psarapsych profile image
psarapsychGraduate

Add you can shut the ?.¡# up too!

suki_007 profile image
suki_007Graduate

Delia, everything everyone said is true! I've been having the same thing said to me too, but it's so delicious to be size 10/12 and I'm loving both my running and eating. Such a journey here on C25K. You're a triumph Delia, re-sculpting both your derriere and your life!

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to suki_007

Suki, hi! How's it going?

suki_007 profile image
suki_007Graduate in reply to DeliaItaly

Fine thanks - I was on tour and worried that I might not find the time to run and eat too much and lose fitness. But it turned out that although I did eat waaay too much, I managed to fit in a treadmill run most days and came back to find I'd lost a few pounds! Now, where's that chocolate again...?!

Hi Delia

Congratulations on your fantastic weight loss.

I'm interested in how you achieved this. Did you follow a specific diet by cutting out sugar?

Keep up the good work. I bet you look AMAZING! ;)

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to

I just run 3 x a week and have cut out sugar (bar a cake or two x week) although i do sugar my coffee.

I have a plate of pasta for lunch and meat/fish and 2 veg for tea. I have also upped my fruit intake. Try it!

shakylegs profile image
shakylegs

Was she Italian by any chance - I too live in Italy and rarely find a female friend that can compliment you if you look heaps better than she does! You sound perfect - enjoy your new body and keep running. Buon Natale.

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to shakylegs

She is indeed! Yes, you have described Italian women perfectly -- but we shouldn't really generalize! Buon natale to you too Shaky!

Anniemurph profile image
AnniemurphGraduate

What a miserable cow she is! Never mind, she obviously has a sad life and issues of her own to deal with, and you have a great figure, a lot of fitness and a happy outlook. Poor her.

And I agree with you, btw - I have always said to my daughters, who loved the film Bambi when they were little, "If you cain't say anythin' nice, don't say anythin' at all." Sorry, it has to be said in a slow, Thumper voice to be fully appreciated, but you get the idea :D

Annie

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to Anniemurph

Absolutely, a miserable cow indeed! Yet she is tall, slim and rolling in money!

I agree with everyone else here that it's how you feel that matters, I'm a bit jealous of th weight, must try this eating properly :-)

My only question is this, Is there any possibility that this college may just be worried that you might go too far and is trying to temper you, think about other interactions you have witnessed, is she generally pleasant with people or not! That will then tell you how to take it, we all sometimes say thing the wrong way, but then it is too late.

Looking at your other comments, think you've answered my last question. IGNORE her comments and make sure you stand near her in your skinny jeans :-)

in reply to

D'oh colleague

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to

Nah, I think she's just someone with problems of her own -- funny but she is a very attractive woman who (apparently) has it all!

I firmly believe that pasta is the secret to weight loss.

Pasta combined with C2kK ;-)

Wishingb profile image
WishingbGraduate

What's "Dukan"?

Whoa, that is some passive aggressive personality she has. Appearing to have it all but definitely not really and not even finding joy in it is she.

DO NOT be with people like that, they are toxic.

paterson profile image
paterson

your weight loss is fantastic. I agree with Wishingb. People like that are toxic. what has made you happy is the weight loss. I bet she isn't happy even if she is loaded.

redfacewoman profile image
redfacewomanGraduate

Ignor the silly woman i think i feel the green eyeed monster raising her ugly head! I've had the same comments that have made me even more determined to continue to date i've lost 20lbs and it's still falling off cut down on bread and potatoes upped fruit and porridge made with water and honey i consider i eat more than ever but of the right things and run 30 mins three times a week look good and feel great- this is a great community website which will continue to encourage and support all of us /WELL DONE x

redfacewoman profile image
redfacewomanGraduate

Ignor the silly woman i think i feel the green eyeed monster raising her ugly head! I've had the same comments that have made me even more determined to continue to date i've lost 20lbs and it's still falling off cut down on bread and potatoes upped fruit and porridge made with water and honey i consider i eat more than ever but of the right things and run 30 mins three times a week look good and feel great- this is a great community website which will continue to encourage and support all of us /WELL DONE x

OldNed profile image
OldNedGraduate

What cheek. Take her for a run and see how she gets on! Then tell her to wrap her comments round a pineapple and shove it (I'm sure she'll be able to work out where). Alternatively (but not as much fun) affect to rise serenely above it, while seizing every opportunity to rub her nose in it because she IS jealous. And have a great Christmas.

Deryn61 profile image
Deryn61Graduate

Just catching up. Just reiterating most of the above! I still have loads of weight to lost but recently have been told on more than 6 separate occasions how brilliant and how much younger than my 51 years I now look (with a few people then adding very quickly that they didnt think I looked bad before, honest lol!). You know whats right for you x

Vivwestie profile image
VivwestieGraduate

LOL at a lot of these comments. They're all true.

You look great, you know you look great and nothing she says can change that.

Anthony Hopkins has a great philosophy, one of the things he says is "what others think about me and say about me is none of my business. I am what I am and I do what I do."

I love it because it takes the pressure of and let's everyone be who they are. Even if they're some twisted, jealous unhappy old bitch!

vixiej profile image
vixiejGraduate

as everyone said, this probably stems from jealousy. I posted somewhere else on here that people around you (close or not, emotionally), do not always like it when you make these big changes in your life, it threatens the status quo. This comment is not about you, Delia, it is about her, and her own insecurities most likely.

Perhaps you should offer to mentor her if she'd like to take up running ;-) Don't waste energy worrying about it. It's great that you love the way you look, don't let her (or anyone) pass their 'bad day' feelings onto you.

I wish I was size 10/12 with DD :-D I was only that way when about 6 weeks pregnant, I'd previously been an A at most, it was like a gift from god when those puppies arrived ;-)

DeliaItaly profile image
DeliaItalyGraduate in reply to vixiej

Hahahaha! That really made me smile! I think the truth is that my working environment well and truly sucks. I don't know about other workplaces, but almost 20 years of benchmarking and bitching are starting to get to me. But of course you are right, it is not my problem. xox delia

Beek profile image
BeekGraduate

Sounds to me like a touch of jealousy creeping into your friend there!

Ignore the negative comments, carry on what you are doing - you do it for YOU , not the audience!

You sound to be in perfect shape!

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