The abusive relationship: running and me

[Girlsgotbutt]

Running: Hi Iris! Its a fabulous day! I am so excited that we are going out today! Do you feel the buzz? The energy? The thrrriiilll???

Me: go away. I am staying home.

Running: Oh, okay. I can see that you are very busy. Netflix is a really important part of your life. Ill just sit here next to you and maybe youll change your mind.

(Exercise pokes me in the ribs)

Me: Oi! Why are you still here?

Exercise: Oh come ooon! You promised youd come out today! I even sent you a text to remind you thos morning. Pleeeaaase??

(Me puts her shoes on and goes for a run)

Me: I hate you, you know.

Running: Naaw, you love me! Look at you! I am so proud.

Me: Stop crying. Its dripping into my eyes.

Running: Its called sweat! Sweat! I love it!

Me: that makes one of us.

Running: Come on!! You love this! Push a little harder and relish in the pain!!!

Me: you are a sadist.

Running: well done, flower. You completed todays programme! How do you feel???

(Me puts a carefully smiling face on the app rating system)

Running: I knew it!!! You love me!!! We will be together forever!!!

Me: I have created a monster.

[Hidden]

Hahahaha that's made my day, and it's so true!!

Coercive control, isn't that what they call it?

The bad news is that there's a great danger you'll get addicted. Maybe you'll want to leave this abusive relationship, but you'll find you just can't lol

All the best, and trust me, even though running is evil at times, when you have that perfect run where everything just falls into place, you'll feel on top of the world, and it will all be worth it.

Neil

[Dexy5 Graduate]

Haha. I must say I didn’t enjoy the actual running to begin with but loved the sense of achievement after. But you will soon be addicted like the rest of us!🏃‍♀️🏃‍♂️

[Leggy_lass]

Love the blog! It is addictive. Why else would I run in the rain. Just finished W6R1 and now I can plough on with my day. Have a good day Iris.

[sallenson Graduate]

Better than The Archers!!! Brilliant....

[Jay66UK Graduate]

Great to read - I recognise it completely. And Iris is a beautiful name.